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west egg

@the-average-gatsby / the-average-gatsby.tumblr.com

Simon, 25. i got soul but i'm not a soldier

tried to google search for that post that's like.. something about squids and it goes "the squirterrrrrrrrr" and believe it or not that did not show me the thing i was looking for

hey guys ✌️ just checking in. "the squirter meme" didnt bring it up either

(exhausted and covered in blood) i found it

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the-real-numbers-deactivated202
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the-real-numbers-deactivated202
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the-real-numbers-deactivated202
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the-real-numbers-deactivated202

WAIT

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the-real-numbers-deactivated202

🤔

Light that sucker up

@maeamian coming in ... delightfully sporting

[img txt: #simple #i would bunt the baby and sprint for first #thus making the problem that of handling the live ball/baby the problem of the catcher and third baseman #who would then have to throw the baby to first before I got there #Then I'd steal second because what're they gonna do try to toss a baby back and forth to get me in a rundown? No fuckin way #I'd take a quick break on second before stealing third and then home #for the game's single most upsetting inside the park home run]

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sotrias-labyrinth-deactivated20
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mozilla-firefucks

Stop putting this christian baby in Situations

genuinely in love with the reveal, from the baby prodigy scenario, that Christian Baby does not refer simply to a baby baptised and born to christians, but to an infant that holds a belief in christian theology

I've never watched Scott Pilgrim but I'm reading about this animated Netflix series and apparently one of the reasons they were able to get the whole cast of the 2010 movie to reprise their roles is bc Michael Cera fucking responded to a 9 year old cast email thread out of nowhere as if no time had passed and got the cast all chatting with each other again

enough preg let's litigate a new fetish. step right up who's got a good one

your mind is so beautiful. im obsessed. i dont even want to litigate over the morals of this one im just mentally playing in this space with u rn. what if i was a naughty little mothgirl and mommy tortured me with stinky mothballs

one thing about americans is that they know how to make a fucking milkshake

i hate the stupid milk consistency shit you get here like if you give me a milkshake it better be rock fucking solid. i want that thang thick like concrete. it should piss me off trying to drink it through a straw. i should have to wait for it to thaw

forgot my night time garlic bread in the oven for the length of 2 mythbusters wpisodes and when i opened the oven door it was so thoroughly cremated that i was blinded not by smoke and ash but what surely must have been its Soul as well