🐸 

Frogs

the afffirmations instagram is driving me fucking insane so here are some faves

tag urself im friday chief

what’s your signature little emoticon !!! for example i use :-] and my boyfriend’s is :o)

the main thing that puts me off of playing chess is that there is 2000 years of gameplay that hundreds of people with higher IQs than me have spent thousands of hours studying the history of, so much so that when i put the pawn forward they say “ah i see youre going for the bulgarian somersault” and then i try to take their bishop with my knight and they go “aw, rookie mistake, youve played the frenchmans cumsock, and in approximately 37 moves i’ll have won”

Oh, "yeast is slow, it costs a lot to fill up" is such a lovely series of word to discover anywhere

tag yourself

i feel like i could find half of these as ao3 tags

I can't breathe this is so funny

There’s something beautiful about the molten glow of lava. It’s a great color and moves in such a way that is satisfying, but its also terrifying knowing that i could touch it and die very quickly

forbidden hot sauce

forbidden soup.

Sometimes I’m like “ancient greek plays are so old, how am i going to relate to the characters?” but then 

HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE

MAKE A WISH

the first post ever on tumblr

I WAS EXPECTING IT TO BE A REMAKE OF SOME SORT HOLY FUCK

WHO THE FUCK KEEPS BRINGING THIS BACK

reblog this because it shows up every blue moon

I FOUND IT ✊

I WAS SO SCARED IT WOULDNT BE THE ORIGINAL

Who first posted this?

I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO END WITH A MEME OR SOME SHIT NO IT’S THE REAL ONE OH MY GOD

Wishing I’ll do well on my finals ✨

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT-

Lmao I thought this was the tumblr posts+ meme version-

GUYS I FOUND I AGAIN-

I’m gonna cry…. It’s the original! Omg

how do i block one post in particular

I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(

hnn I WANT IT SO BAD

on closer inspection, it makes a lot of really obnoxious noises and is also Too Expensive. BUT FEAR NOT I found this slightly smaller dude wedged in the back!

IT HAS BITE ACTION, AND THAT’S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS

now we enter the testing phase

yup. looks good.

Extreme Chompin T-Rex says IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS

Can we take a moment to appreciate that we can use this as a rosetta stone to say “EXTREME CHOMPIN’ “ in four languages?

OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT, let me check the garbage to see if it’s still there! hopefully I didn’t destroy it in my excitement

*roar sound effect*

IMPORTANT UPDATE:

update update: I re-sized her collar and found a bag of toy bones at the craft store. I haven’t put this much effort into a non-school thing since my last job search, help

(secret bonus: the other side of her tag)

There’s more!

I love.

I saw that people are reblogging the thread again, so I thought I’d give you all an update on how Wexter is doing!

(just fine)

Wexter And The Case Of Her Continuing Marvelously Naughty Garden Adventures

OP and Wexter can break all my toes and I would still send a thank you card

Wexter says SHE WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING (but she might chew your ankles a little bit maybe)

so it’s come to my attention that at some point this weekend Wexter blew past 100,000 notes, and I for one think that’s very cash money of her.

it’s been a few weeks, I suppose we should check up on the AHSGSHGAFB?!

ajdhf.

well that’s just,,,

REXCELLENT

two hundred THOUSAND notes???!?!

HELL

YES

HELL

FUCKING

YES.

Nearing on 375K Notes!!! What in the Paleolithic are y'all gonna do when they top 400K?!

cry, probably

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN

I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????

That last fatal scream tho

THE TERROR IN HIS SCREAM OH GOSH

i’m crying

WAAA-

I will always reblog this on the off chance some other poor soul has been searching for it

IT’S BACK

HOYL SHIT ITS B A CK

IT’S BACK?? ON MY DASH?

re-blogging again xD

what was that we were just saying about still having posts circulating from ridiculous numbers of years ago? 😂

@hellsite-hall-of-fame @heritageposts

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to whatever child was just born at the same time the 100,000th destiel fic was posted on ao3. you may have been conceived on november 5th 2020 and that’s horrible to think about

Why seriously tell people to kill themselves when ‘deactivate your account’ is 1000x funnier and 1000x less shitty?

unplug your controller dawg

forfeit my buddy

concede dude

Call your ISP and tell them you’ve had enough.

Now that we have these fantastic alternatives I don’t wanna see anyone telling people to kill themselves anymore.

@. twitter stan accounts: take some fucking notes

Go off-grid (:

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

“THAT’S RIGHT TWAS I that set the house ablaze!!!”

Dying.

Every fucking time I know what’s at the bottom and every time I still lose my shit.

I’m so happy this post is back again asdlkfjsa

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

(via meanboysclub)

The last one

Also good on these people for taking the aggressively petty route instead of falsely registering their pets as service animals

I love how everyone intentionally interpreted this not as “your dog must be small” but “your dog must be in a bag”

“aww cute!! big doggies in ba-”

*cry-laughing as i hit the reblog button*

She’s in a bag! Rules didn’t specify how…

I mean, either the dogs are under control by being carried in a bag, or they’re under control by their harness being a bag… so win-win, I guess?

wallace and gromit

im gonna vomit

i got a glock with your name on it

pacific rim, on blu-ray 

i might suck dick but im not gay

this post getting unflagged is like restoring the library of alexandria