You'll never have what we have
ur body is not meant to be as skinny as possible it's supposed to be filled with potatoes
And SANDVICH.
thank you heavy
my second grade teacher tried to gently break the news to my mom that I couldn't read at a parent-teacher conference lol. she's all like "I know this is hard to hear but she's very behind I'm sorry" mom comes home and is like NIA! EXPLAIN THIS!! I'm like mooooooom those baby books at school are so bo-RING! 😂
image description: a tweet from ر ت ت ت (@ raniawrites), timestamped 7:38 AM on 19 Feb 23
many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son’s teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her “he NEVER speaks”, I asked him - “Gabo, what’s going on?” he looked up from his book & calmly said “ Oh I just don’t have anything to say to that woman”
I had the exact same thing happen when I was a kid; my kindergarten teacher swore up and down that I was completely illiterate, cause I'd take the baby books in the classroom, flip through them, then never touch any of them again. My parents kept informing her that no, seriously, the kid can read, the kid is reading full chapter books on their own, of course they don't give a shit about See Spot Run
Teacher continued to insist they were wrong and in denial about their kid being illiterate. She throws such a shit fit over the matter that the principal has to get involved, and I am brought to his office for a specific literacy test in front of him, my teacher, and a parent. they expected my mother to show up, on account of it being 2004. Mom has a full time job doing something sciency at the pulp mill, and no time for this nonsense. Dad runs a small construction company, and absolutely has time for this nonsense. We're off to a good start already.
Teacher is very smug about this, fully expecting me to once again prove my complete dumbassery. My daycare was attached to the school, and that's allowed me to build a reputation in advance. I'm that one kid that slammed their own head into a windowsill for unclear reasons, then failed to understand why adults were concerned about the blood pouring down my face. I've accidentally wounded myself so many times that my incident folder needed to be expanded. There is significant evidence for me being a dumbass of epic proportions.
Unfortunately for my teacher, I'm also a dumbass who can read.
I am handed a book. It is a picture book about an elephant. I refuse the book, because I find it boring and patronizing. I have no idea what we're all doing here, and nobody has made any real effort to explain the situation to me. The teacher looks triumphant. The principal winces.
Dad persuades me to just read the dumb book out loud. I begrudgingly comply.
I tear through the entire thing in about a minute, then throw it aside in disgust.
Dad was prepared for this moment. He is here to produce maximum chaos. The principal and teacher are still trying to understand what the fuck just happened, when Dad produces a different book and hands it me. He suggests I read a chapter of that to everyone.
I take the book, and happily begin reading Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.
The principal is giving the teacher an unimpressed Look. The teacher is torn between wanting to strangle me, and wanting to strangle my dad. My dad is 6'3, which means neither option is very appealing. Neither staff member was emotionally prepared for a five year old to break out a novel. Dad has been arguing about this for weeks now. He is enjoying the vindication. He helpfully informs the principal that I've already finished the first two books, and am eagerly awaiting my older sibling being done with book three so I can start reading it.
The principal, now looking very tired, suggests that maybe I should go back to class now.
The teacher hates me with a passion and vengeance for the rest of the year. I am an autistic five year old, and therefor completely oblivious to it. I remain unaware of this entire story until my parents explain it to me as a teenager.
A 1999 game catalog from Japan contains an extremely rare version of the Japanese Mario Party box art render without the logo that would normally cover the middle of the image.
Main Blog | Twitter | Patreon | Small Findings | Source: twitter.com user "Quiet767"
Anonymous asked:
Where do the characters get the stuff they use In the Mario Kart Games from? And did the characters design the tracks that have their names?
I’m not quite sure what stuff you’re specifically referring to, but regardless, the answer is quite complicated. Assuming you’re talking about Karts and Items, the answer is “various places”.
Back in Super Mario Kart, while Mario was likely the one who organised, funded or at least initially proposed the event, Lakitu was the coordinator of the event, and ran the tracks. In the beginning they had more conservative rules surrounding the vehicles in use on the courses:
Hi everybody! Thanks for dropping by the Super Mario Kart race track. My name is Lakitu, I run this track. If you need my help, I'll be around. We race one seater, metal pipe frame go carts here. There are two engine sizes to choose from: 50cc or 100cc.
Mario Kart stated out a a fun recreational event with a handful of trophies. That’s the main reason the characters take part, and it has been the reason since the very beginning, in Super Mario Kart. Each one of the characters is competing due to their connection to Mario.
An adorable little kart racetrack has been built in the Mario world! Mario and his happy-go-lucky friends have gotten so enthusiastic about kart racing that they're already causing a ruckus! Even now, they're smack in the middle of a race! Let's take a quick peek at how it's going, shall we? Oh, it's just about to start! Even the usually cute characters look a little tense. Let's watch Mario and friends fight hard!
However, in the years since it has become the Mushroom Kingdom’s premiere racing event and grown significantly. Racers from various Kingdoms take part resulting in an incredibly diverse audience. Mario Kart now has dozens of sponsors for each Grand Prix, extended tournaments, its own television network, branded tracks and inter-dimensional courses and guest racers.
Mario Kart 64 was the first major step in this direction, but Mario Kart: Double Dash!! brought things even further. From its manual:
THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM’S PREMIER RACING EVENT IS BACK! HOWEVER, THERE’S BEEN ONE MAJOR CHANGE TO THE RULES OF THE ROAD… THERE ARE NOW TWO RIDERS PER KART! NOW, RIDERS FROM THROUGHOUT THE LAND HAVE COME TOGETHER NO TEST THEIR DRIVING SKILLS. WHICH PAIR WILL PROVE THE FASTEST?
[Source: The Double Dash Grand Prix!, Page 6, Instruction Booklet of Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, November 2003]
When Mario Kart started out, standard Pipe Frames were the only legal builds for the Mario GP. These models were likely built by Mario and his friends themselves.
However, with Mario Kart: Double Dash!! the Pipe Frames were retired in favour of a variety of Karts. Many of these karts were custom-made or modified pre-existing cars. Take Luigi's kart of choice in Mario Kart DS, for example: the Poltergust 4000. This Kart is part of the Poltergust series, a line of inventions created by Professor E. Gadd.
Another pair of examples are the Wario Car, which Wario makes use of in Mario Kart: Double Dash!! and Mario Kart Arcade GP 2, and the Wario Bike, which Wario makes use of in Mario Kart Wii. These are Wario's personal car and bike, which he uses in the Wario Land and WarioWare titles, and both were built by Wario's friend Dr. Crygor:
I AM DR. CRYGOR, THE GENIUS SCHOLAR. OTHERS HAVE SAID A "DANGEROUS" SCHOLAR, BUT I PAY NO MIND TO THEIR OPINIONS. MY LABORATORY IS SET UP TO FURTHER MY EXPERIMENTS IN REALITY GAMES. FEEL FREE TO STOP BY AND CONTRIBUTE TO MY RESEARCH. IT IS QUITE FUN. DID YOU KNOW THAT I WAS THE ONE WHO CREATED WARIO'S CAR? WHAT? YOU DO NOT KNOW? DO YOUR RESEARCH!
[Source: The Laboratory Authority - Dr. Crygor, Page 21, Instruction Booklet of WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgame$!, May 2003]
This odd genius lives in seclusion. He built Wario’s bike. Mona’s moped, Kat’s sword, and Jimmy’s cell phone. He wears a cryogenic suit that doesn’t protect his head.
The Standard Kart series of builds was then introduced as a replacement for the Pipe Frame in Mario Kart Arcade GP 2 and carried into tournaments from Mario Kart DS onwards. As a result of this, in later tournaments, custom or pre-existing vehicles were allowed to enter the tournament upon being modified to be legal for the Grand Prix. The Pipe Frames did eventually return in tournaments from Mario Kart 7 onwards, which featured more in-depth kart customisation.
Speaking of which, the Mario Kart events are sponsored by other brands Mario owns, such as the aforementioned Mario Motors, Mario Star, etc. These sponsors, as well as the many others not otherwise connected to Mario, likely fund the events and even provide them with parts and supplies.
It stands to reason that Mushroom Piston Engines provides engines, Fuzzy Battery provides batteries, Bob-omb Plugs provides spark plugs, Dream Gliders provides gliders, 1-Up Fuel provides fuel, Bowser Oil provides oil, 100% Organic Antifreeze provides antifreeze, etc.
Mario Kart Arcade GP 2 makes reference to a Grand Prix Committee, which sends letters to Cup winners to invite them to the Cup’s special Challenge stage. Their letters are closed with an “M” stamped seal. This would imply Mario is at least on this committee, if not the head of it. This is presumably the committee that organises the events and decides which participants to invite, what items will be used, etc.
As mentioned previously, all of the participants either know Mario directly or have connections to people who know Mario. The Super Mario Kart manual seems to call attention to how each of the participant racers connect to Mario specifically.
MARIO & LUIGI The Mario Brothers have pretty much the same abilities in cart driving. Mario and Luigi have had a friendly rivalry that goes back to their childhood.
PRINCESS & YOSHI At first, you might think that The Princess and Yoshi would have nothing in common (except their fondness for Mario).
BOWSER & DONKEY KONG JR. These two drivers have long been Mario's arch enemies.
While Toad and Koopa Troopa's descriptions don't specifically connect them to Mario, Toad is of course a long-time friend of Mario and servant to Peach, while Koopa Troopa is a minion of Bowser:
Usually a faithful underling of Bowser, [Koopa Troopa] shows even the big boss no mercy during a race.
[Source: Characters and Special Items, Page 20, Instruction Booklet of Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, November 2003]
Koopa Troopa, of the Turtle Tribe. Usually one of Bowser's minions, but as far as races go, it's a different story!?
In short, Mario is what brings them all together - and in turn they each bring their own special items. The iconic Banana Peels thrown by racers in the Mario Kart series are actually from the Kong's Banana Hoard on Donkey Kong Island, having originally been brought to the races by Donkey Kong Jr. back in Super Mario Kart:
Because of Donkey Kong Jr.! He likes bananas, and the peels are slippery, so they got the okay.
[Source: Tadashi Sugiyama, Director and C.G. Designer of Super Mario Kart, Nintendo Classic Mini: SNES developer interview – Volume 4: Super Mario Kart, September 2017]
In the original game, the only CPU-controlled character who throws banana peels is Donkey Kong Jr., which was a way to characterise the characters.
[Source: Hideki Konno, Director of Super Mario Kart, Nintendo Classic Mini: SNES developer interview – Volume 4: Super Mario Kart, September 2017]
Despite Donkey Kong Jr. not appearing in tournaments after Super Mario Kart, it seems his son, the current Donkey Kong, continued to supply Bananas from Mario Kart 64 onwards. Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong even brought along some Giant Bananas in Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, Mario Kart: Arcade GP 2 and Mario Kart Tour:
Special Item GIANT BANANA Only DK and Diddy know where these monstrous fruit can be found.
[Source: Characters and Special Items, Page 19, Instruction Booklet of Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, November 2003] From this we can speculate about the origins of other items. Shells are common clothing/armour worn by Koopas, but seeing as the shells in Mario Kart are standard Koopa Troopa Shells, it stands to reason that the Koopa Troopa racer or perhaps Bowser brought the Red Shells and Green Shells originally used in Super Mario Kart.
These shells are worn by Koopa Troopas, both within and outside of Bowser's Army. We can even see one of Bowser's Airships in Super Mario Galaxy equipped with a shell dispenser:
The Green Shells and Red Shells even function how you'd expect - with Green Shells flying straight forward and Red Shells heading towards the nearest target!
However, with the expansion of Mario Kart in later titles the shells, which are mass-produced, appear to be provided by a company, with sponsors for "Green Shell Strike Equipment" and "Red Shell Strike Equipment" making appearances:
Koopa Troopa and Koopa Paratroopa seem to have their own supply in Mario Kart: Double Dash!!:
Special Items TRIPLE SHELLS (GREEN / RED) Don't let Koopa and Paratroopa worry about not having enough shells.
[Source: Characters and Special Items, Page 20, Instruction Booklet of Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, November 2003]
Bowser also provides his own shells for the tournaments in Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, Mario Kart: Arcade GP 2 and Mario Kart Tour:
Bowser's Shell This big ol' shell on loan from Bowser will crash any karts it hits and keep on going. It can only be thrown forward.
On the topic of items, Super Mario Kart used ? Panels to dispense its items. These panels are likely made by the same people in the Mushroom Kingdom who make ? Blocks. While they weren't used in later Mario Kart tournaments, they have still made a few other appearances since, such as in Mario Party 9.
From the Mario Kart 64 Mario GP onwards the ? Panels were replaced with the iconic Item Boxes, which were likely much more convenient for transportation and addition to the racetracks. But it wasn't until Mario Kart Wii where we actually learned where these come from, through the course Toad's Factory.
This is actually the Item Box Factory, as we can see not only from the trackside banners with the Item Box logo and giant sign of Toad with an Item Box, but from the shipping containers items ready to go into the Item Boxes:
Inside the factory, we can even see the process of how Item Boxes are made. The Items are put inside standard Brick Blocks, before the Brick Blocks are placed on a conveyor belt with stamps of some sort. These stamps appear to be filled with some sort of magical rainbow liquid, likely sourced from Power Stars, which transforms the Brick Blocks into the Item Boxes, giving them their translucent rainbow appearance and their ability to float:
Circling back to the Kongs for a moment, Funky Kong is actually the one responsible for the construction of the DK Barrel Cannons featured prominently throughout Mario Kart courses.
We learn this when Donkey Kong mentions Funky in the context of their creation in Mario Super Sluggers:
Oooook! (Looks like Funky Kong has been busy.)
[Source: Donkey Kong, Best Friend of Funky Kong, Playable Character in Mario Super Sluggers, August 2008]
This isn't all too surprising though, given Funky Kong's previous barrel-based mechanic work and his appearances in Mario Kart Wii and Mario Kart Tour, as well as the barrel-inspired Funky Stadium which he presumably also built:
Speaking of which, it's about time I discuss the stadiums, circuits and other courses and where they came from!
Mario is world-famous and incredibly wealthy from his adventures, businesses and sports stardom. Multiple of the circuits in the games are also clearly built by him or at least in honour of him. He‘s the only character with actual circuits named after him in Super Mario Kart:
State-of-the-art racetracks in the Mario world that are rich in variety. The effectiveness of the pipe obstacles is the key.
Mario Circuits have also been described as the primary circuits of their respective Grand Prix:
Mario Circuit This is the main circuit in Mario Kart: Double Dash!! Familiar denizens of the Mushroom Kingdom can be spotted here and there. The road's filled with curves, so this is a good place to practice drifting.
It stands to reason that most characters had a hand in designing the tracks that bear their names. In fact we know that's the case for several courses, such as N64 Wario Stadium:
That rascal Wario was in charge of the design and construction of this course. A fan of motocross races, he brought in major amounts of sand to fill this huge stadium in an attempt to build a course more suitable to bikes than Karts. Each lap's distance is extremely long, making it difficult to stay concentrated on the race.
Meanwhile the Bowser's Castle courses are modified from or otherwise based on the real Bowser's Castle:
Surprisingly, the Bowser's Castle has been transformed into a race ground! Because it's inside the building, most of the corners are tricky right angles. However, the most difficult part of the course is where the Thwomps are. They will block your path, and if you run into one, you will spin out. Should you be stepped by one, you'll find yourself squished flat as a pancake.
Bowser typically designs his courses with the help of his minions to be filled with traps in the hopes of beating Mario. This goes beyond the Mario Kart tracks and also applies to his Tennis Courts, Golf Courses, etc.:
Lord Bowser designed his course to defeat Mario, so it’s kinda full of lava and bombs and stuff like that.
Bowser enlisted his minions to create this course in hopes of defeating Mario with all the traps and hazards.
However, this isn't universally the case. For example, Peach Beach is merely Princess Peach's favourite beach resort in the Southern Isles, while Toad's Turnpike is on a public road in Toad City!
I could go on and on about the Mario Kart series and the depth to its worldbuilding, but I think that's quite enough for today. Thank you for reading!
I went to a library book sale this weekend and I found a very old book called “Electronic Life: How to Think About Computers,” which was published in I think 1975? I’ve been reading it kind of like how I would read a historical document, and it’s lowkey fascinating
There’s a whole paragraph that’s like “okay, find the keyboard. Don’t panic if it has more keys than a typewriter, that’s normal. Really, it’s fine. The extra keys don’t make things harder. It’s FINE”
Thought this section was particularly interesting:
Can the computer create something? At first glance it seems obvious that it can. Animated computer graphics, with their fluid transitions and whiplash perspectives, look strikingly new. And if one watches the machine doing animation work, there seem to be lengthy periods when the computer is acting “on its own.”
But if one observes these processes in more detail, it becomes clear that creation is not occurring within the machine. First of all, computer graphics are not unique. Computers have yet to generate anything that cannot be done by hand—and usually already has been done. Second, the apparent ability of the computer to “act on its own” is the outcome of thousands of hours of patient human effort to refine its instructions. The computer can manipulate a shape for us if we have already informed it what a shape is, what the rules for shape manipulation are, what this specific shape is, and so forth.
You can start an automobile engine and it will run by itself, too, but that doesn’t mean it’s being creative. It’s just running.
rowantheexplorer
They’re also shooting for 100% renewable plastic sources by 2030! All of the soft plant/leaf elements in sets right now and going forward are made out of bioplastic made from sugarcane, and they’re working on getting the regular hard plastic bricks out of that, too.
They’ve done it, actually! The full bricks are in the prototype stage now, and are expected to be 100% biodegradable without the need for a commercial compost facility. It’s very cool. Right now they’re testing the durability and playability of the bricks and seeing what needs to be revised/reworked on their final model.
apurplefriend
So its that easy huh
Of course it is
Actually, this isn’t “easy” and is huge news. You see, Lego is absolutely meticulous about their quality control. Their standards for manufacturing are stupidly high, as are their safety requirements. You know that distinctive “click” when you pop two Lego bricks apart? They engineered that. That sound is so distinctive that it can be used to tell genuine Lego bricks from counterfeits and it’s a sound that would be based on shape and material.
Furthermore, one of the hard requirements for a Lego brick is that it must be compatible with any other Lego brick. If I buy a set today and pull a set from the 1980s? Those bricks would fit together perfectly. This requires a huge amount of precision engineering and controls on manufacturing quality. (I can’t remember the source, but I’ve at least heard that once the brick molds wear to a certain point, they’re pulled from the line and either melted down or turned into construction material for Lego HQ. Point being, no one is getting their hands on a worn Lego mold)
Recycled and non-petroleum plastics are different from other plastic. The chemistry is different. The timing and process to use them is different. This has been a reason why more companies haven’t moved to them, because there’s a drop in quality for material (so they claim).
What Lego just did is completely obliterate that argument. The corporation with some of the strictest quality control requirements for plastic just kicked the basic foundation of the “bad quality” argument out from under it, because if they feel confident enough to guarantee the same experience as using a brick from over 40 years ago, if they are confident enough that they can meet their own metrics at a huge industrial scale….
Nobody else has any excuse.
The guy who shot Ronald Reagan has been selling cat paintings on ebay
He has 100% positive feedback
It's kinda cute how Argentina just sorta reaches her hand out so she can have a border with Brasil 🥰
Alguém aí já tinha reparado nessa mãozinha boba da Argentina?
... é Yuri ou Yaoi?
Resultado oficial: BRARG É YURI
do you ever watch videos of youtubers reading their own crappy wattpad x self insert fics and think to yourself man i would love to explain the sold to one direction trope to these kids, it would absolutely break them
it was the morning after the big move (a/n idk where she moved too lol) and you swept your messy dark brown hair that was slightly wavy with sun kissed blonde streaks in it up into a messy bun and swiped mascara across your thick lashes that brought out your shining blue ocean colored orbs before throwing on the large frumpy sweatshirt that i had thrown on the floor the night before. i heard the doorbell ring from downstairs. “y/n!” your mom yelled “get down here quick!” “what is it mom?” i yelled back, she was so annoying sometimes. “your new owners are here,” she stated. “my- what?” you stammered, perfect pink lips opening in shock. “yes honey, how else do you think i was able to pay for this house and my alcohol addition? now open the door” you opened the door and saw them on the doorstep, one direction. they looked mostly bored but harry opened his arms and gave you a brilliant smile, his pearly white teeth glistening in the sun. “hey princess get your stuff.”
Fucking the weed man for weed. Fucking the texts man for texts. Fucking the milk man for milk. Fucking the egg man for rrrrROBOTS to TROUNCE that pesky porcupine!
