no earth spoilers please, i’m only up to the cambrian explosion

i’m really loving these new dinosaur characters, i hope they stick around awhile

oh fuck off

When you go to a haunted house, it may seem like you’re being funny by trying to scare the actors or jump out at them when you go through a second time, but guess what? ITS NOT FUNNY.

You pay us to scare you. It is your choice to go, so don’t fucking go through if you’re going to ignore the rules and get too close to the actors as a ‘joke’.

These bruises happened because over the course of 4 hours, several people ignored the instructions that CLEARLY stated that they were to wait in the front room until told otherwise. Rather than listen, they ran into the next room and slammed into me- effectively throwing me into the wall. This didn’t only happen once. It happened ten times at LEAST.

Then we had this asshole who thought that once I ‘died’ for the haunt, he could pretend to kick me to see if I’d moved. I, being used to people abusing me- jumped back and slammed my head into the concrete wall.

YOU ARE NOT FUNNY BY BEING RUDE AT A HAUNTED HOUSE. WE ARE PAID ACTORS THAT YOU CHOOSE TO COME AND SEE PERFORM. YOU PAY US TO SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU, SO DONT HIT US WHEN WE DO

I feel that this is relevant considering it is October and more Haunted Houses are opening up. I know it seems funny to scare the ‘monsters’ but all you do is hurt real people. So stop.

It’s not even October but I’m still spreading this

SIGNAL BOOOOOOOOSSSSSTTTTT!!!!!!! Now

Yeah…your director may want to consider reblocking

We don’t have a director? Or blocking??? It’s a haunted house bro, not a play

Reblogging for relevance-

I work at a Haunted House every October, and have been for the past few years. Our house in particular is staffed by Volunteer workers who are either earning credits for Graduation, or people who know the Family that owns the haunted attraction. In our City, we’re one of two Haunted Houses, so while we open in late September, we tend to get incredibly busy during the month of October and often work from 6pm until 2, 3am on weekends. 

We do not get paid to help out. Due to our location, we get a lot of drunk guys coming through, and a lot of ‘funny’ teenagers. In my several years working there, I’ve seen Actors get grabbed and thrown, stomped on, kicked, bitten, everything. A lot of the Actors at this attraction are young teenagers, Middle and Secondary School students, so this kind of abuse is terrifying and potentially emotionally scarring.

There’s a position half-way through the house we call ‘Psych Ward’, and it’s essentially a jump scare. The scare is a corner-room, boxed in with walls and broken windows, that the Actor pops out of and shouts and taunts the people going through. October, 2012, a couple were going through the Psych Ward corner and the scare went off as per usual. The girlfriend of this couple got very startled but laughed it off and continued on. The boyfriend, however, back-tracked and went up to the broken window and punched the Actor in the face for scaring his girlfriend. The Actor, who I’m going to call Tracy, had a black eye for a good two weeks solid and the couple had to be escorted out of the house and were banned from the property. Ever since we’ve ruled that Veteran Actors (someone who’s been there for 3+ years) are the only ones allowed in this particular Scaring Spot.

He paid to get scared and then got violent when we delivered.

There are so many stories I can tell of ignorant customers banging back on scares and injuring the Actors inside, grabbing props from the actors and hurting them with it, destroying props because they thought it would be ‘funny’. 

I just want to raise awareness that the ACTORS ARE STILL PEOPLE. We’re instructed to get the best kind of scare out of you, sometimes with no pay at all (like this particular attraction), so please respect our work.

We wouldn’t come to your job, mock you, and push you around trying to be ‘funny’. Don’t come to our job and do that to us!

I literally cannot believe people are angry over this post saying “don’t fucking beat up actors”

I work at a haunted hayride and a guy tried to dropkick me in the chest and knee me in the face because he thought it was funny.

I got in trouble for breaking character to tell him to fucking stop.

Ive been hit so many times this season it has left cuts and bruises. Back in 2015 I was fucking choked and dragged behind a wagon because a lady was drunk and her son had to pry her hands off me because IM NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH YOU OR FIGHT BACK.

Most recently, a customer groped my breasts and twisted my fucking nipples. Apparently, she did it to AT LEAST twenty other actors.

THAT IS SEXUAL ASSAULT YOU ASSHOLES. ITS NOT OKAY.

Most recently a customer fucking kicked me and sent me to the goddamned hospital.

WHEN YOU GO TO A HAUNTED HAYRIDE / HAUNTED HOUSE, REMEMBER YOU LITERALLY PAID US TO SCARE YOU.

THE ACTORS ARE REAL PEOPLE.

DO NOT FUCKING HIT US.

Why the fuck would you even do this holy shit

Hey guys i know this is out of theme but that comment from @witchcryptid was me and my old url. I plan on working this job again this year if at all possible, so here’s an added psa:

If your family or friend(s) force you into a haunting, be upfront as best you can and tell actors as they come up “please do not scare me i am too anxious / scared” and 9.99/10 times we will listen and leave you alone. just communicate with us even though we most often cannot communicate back.

Also, please remember to keep your hands off of us during your haunting, and also please try to step in or speak up if you see people trying to touch us, assault us, or talking about planning to touch or hurt a staff member.

We cannot do anything and will most likely get in legal trouble for touching you in defense.

Thank you and have a spooky fall 🌻🍁🍂🍃

I…I feel really upset that this has to be a reminder ._.

I mean they should know you’re…justacting.

jesus christ…

I don’t even do haunted houses (I’m one of those aforementioned anxious people) but boosting the signal because this is seriously not cool.

Hey guys it’s that time!!

You paid for a ticket which means you consented to be scared!

As an ex haunt monster please for fucks sake if you KNOW your reflex is to strike when scared DO NOT GO TO THESE.

,

I accidentally punched an actor during a haunted maze because he popped out of the ceiling 5 inches from my face, and I immediately yelled out sorry and felt so fucking bad. I haven’t been to a haunted house or maze since because I now know I have a punching reflex.

To all the actors out there, I apologize on behalf of the accidental punchers. I’m so fucking sorry. And to everyone who punches actors on purpose, GO TO FUCKING HELL.

fuck this pandemic i couldve ruined 2020 on my own

Started from the bottom now we're here.

We've come a long way... we are just getting started.

they are here to inform you

this is the funniest fucking thing to me

i don’t get it omg

who the fuck is party cannon they’re the true rebels here

look at this fucking album cover

all i want in life is michael sheen and david tennant to get back in character for like 2 minutes and do a waltz to the gomens theme song waltz as aziraphale and crowley

Aziraphale:”A pet rock is a fun pet until you realize it’s essentially immortal and you’ve damned it to an eternity of watching it’s loved ones die”

Crowley:”Angel, stop texting me at 3 in the morning”

crowley & aziraphale, rolling up to st james park 1862 in matching outfits and sideburns: well one of us is going to have to change

the best line in good omens, the book, happens in the first proper chapter and it’s the one that says “presumably he was wearing shoes” while describing crowley for the first time. presumably he was wearing shoes. it’s goddamn genius

no, sorry, I’m still .... when the first EVER rain starts falling, Aziraphale’s instinctive response is, “Don’t know what this is, but I’ll protect you?”

i was watching this interview with anathema's actor, Arjona, was on it and the question "have you ever told a lie?" arose and she told a story of how she pretended to be deaf for two weeks when she was younger so she was taken to the doctor but they were like "no she's fine, she's just ignoring the crap out if everyone" like thats the funniest thing ive ever heard in my life

I’m sobbing because crowley would have to be woken up at the asscrack of dawn to go to the farmers market with aziraphale and he would be whining about how cold it is and how tired he is while aziraphale goodnaturedly puts up with it while buying some more honey for their afternoon teas and Crowley on a whim buys aziraphale a bouquet of sunflowers and he hands it to him saying ‘can we go now angel I found you a stupid centerpiece for the week’ and the way aziraphale’s face just lights up makes it all worth it

fellas is it gay if he hands you a bag of books you care a great deal about that he protected from the bombing he provoked to save your life and your fingers brush for a moment before he takes his hand off the handle and offers to drop you off and you're not saying anything you're just looking at him as he leaves and then you look down at the bag for a second and then you look up, realizing what you feel for him, what he might feel for you

Hastur: You played us like a fiddle!

Crowley: Fiddles are actually difficult to play; I played you like the cheap kazoo that you are.

Crowley running into the flaming bookshop

I’ve seen some fics and things where Aziraphale isn’t sure Crowley can really fall in love, which is all well and good, but I raise you:

Aziraphale can sense love, so he felt it the moment Crowley fell in love with him. Way back in Rome, in Mesopotamia, in Eden. That’s why he’s so skittish around him. Because he knows how deep and real that love is, and it scares him. They’re on opposite sides after all. And once Aziraphale really lets himself lean into that love, that affection he’s so starved for, he knows there’ll be no going back. So he hesitates.

Conversely then, Crowley can sense hate and dislike. So he felt Aziraphale’s initial wariness of him ease and fade, but he could never be sure, supernaturally, if Aziraphale ever started loving him. That’s why Crowley is so forward, in his way. Come to lunch, come for a ride, run away with me. The invitations get more desperate as they’re running out of time because he needs to know. He needs to know that Aziraphale loves him back, and he has no other way than the way of mortals, to simply ask and hope.