You call and ask do you still love me so calmly
Part of me wants to say yes without thinking and the other part of me pauses remembering everything you put me through.
So instead I answer with
You will always have a piece of me that loved you and I will never get that piece back. You took it from me without asking and I carelessly gave it to you. But I cannot love you now because I need to find new pieces of myself that only belong to me.
A.Val
May you have to courage to live your mysteries with an open heart
{David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest/ Friedrich Nietzsche, from a letter to Malwida von Meysenbug wr. c. 1876/ Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters/ IDK You Yet, Song by Alexander 23/ Robert Desnos/ Albert Camus, from a letter to María Casares written c. June 1944/ Emily Brontë, from The Collected Novels; "Wuthering Heights,"/ Caroline George, Dearest Josephine/ Srinivas Mishra/ Unknown/ Maria Casarès to Albert Camus, Correspondance, Christmas, 1948/ Unknown}
“Be a child again. Flirt. Giggle. Dip your cookies in your milk. Take a nap. Say you are sorry if you hurt someone. Chase a butter?y. Be a child again.”
— Unknown
“Please stop destroying what is left of your heart by constantly thinking about things that have broken you.”
— Nikita Gill
My therapist told me to post this lol
The legacies people leave behind in you.
My handwriting is the same style as the teacher’s who I had when I was nine. I’m now twenty one and he’s been dead eight years but my i’s still curve the same way as his.
I watched the last season of a TV show recently but I started it with my friend in high school. We haven’t spoken in four years.
I make lentil soup through the recipe my gran gave me.
I curl my hair the way my best friend showed me.
I learned to love books because my father loved them first.
How terrifying, how excruciatingly painful to acknowledge this. That I am a jigsaw puzzle of everyone I have briefly known and loved. I carry them on with me even if I don’t know it. How beautiful.
~Edit~
Yikes guys I didn’t expect this post to blow up.
I’m grateful it did though. Looking at all the comments and tags really takes a stab at my heart because it just shows how wired we are for connection. If life has any meaning, then it’s that.
This concept really sunk its teeth into me as it reassures the notion that no one is ever truly gone. Parts of them just change into you.
That teacher I talked about inspired me to become a teacher myself. This was my first year teaching. Here’s to a new generation of curved i’s.
Daniel Saint
I needed to hit my own bottom and claw my way out of i
“I lost myself trying to please everyone else. Now I’m losing everyone while I’m finding myself.”
— Unknown
“Someone who truly loves you, sees what a mess you can be, how moody you can get, and how hard you can be to handle, but still wants you.”
— Unknown
“You can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will.”
— Stephen King
“I wish I could say everything in one word. I hate all the things that can happen between the beginning of a sentence and the end.”
— Leonard Cohen
