this was like 8 individual slaps in the face
Pick Man.
in celebration of this post popping off for no reason i drew the Pick Man
splatoon fans are like “you GOTTA listen to ‘freshwater freekin it’ that one is straight fire” and link you to a song composed of synthesized cat meows, first graders playing recorders, and vine booms. and then by the end you’re absolutely furious because they’re right
splatoon fans in the notes are behaving how you might expect
Its real now thanks op
i cannot BELIEVE
"fuck my stupid baka life" is the most useful phrase on earth other than variations of "i'm killing myself"
as a kid i had one of those “there’s a monster under my bed” moments except real.
every night i would cry about a ghost or something trying to scare me by knocking on my bedroom windows and walls. like, really loudly, every hour or so, every night. only at night. so my dad was like “heh okay kiddo let’s check it out :) ah see? there’s nothing here :)” and left.
until years later he admitted to me that he did in fact hear the unexplainable knocking when he slept in that room one night, and it kept him awake with fear. and suddenly felt awful for not believing little kid me.
imagine your kid being like “daddy there’s a demon in my closet” and you being like ok son lemme just check that for you :). and you open the door and there’s a demon in the closet
WHAT
[Image ID: tags that read: #as a little kid i cried a lot about a monster scratching at my walls and hissing and my parents never beleived me #until the flat next door was cleared out by cops and they found an abandoned gator in the room next to mine. End ID.]
if you’ve been following me for 4+ years i’m certain you could make a chart of every character i’ve gotten attached to and it would tell you more about me than any therapist’s notes ever could. but we don’t have the time for that. there are other things at hand. do not even worry about it. next exhibit. we’re moving along. we’re walking
“i’m noticing.. a pattern—” well stop noticing. close the book. Put it away. step outside and have a cigarette or something. close your eyes. it’s not worth it
was gonna design a fishmonger character but now they are absolutely a fishfag
oops
think i figured out how to replicate this (you're welcome dev team (btw hire me @staff))
- write a tag
- copy text from a tag that has the #
- paste that text into a tag youre *editing* (doesnt seem to trigger on new tags)
I feel like if humans swallowed rocks like birds do to help grind up food we'd have so much fun with it.
Can just imagine all the girlies on tiktok going "I know this is a bit controversial but I honestly love using limestone as a gastrolith. Not only can you readily forage it but they are just so pretty when smoothed out after regurgitating them"
and then all the comments would be like " girl 😭 😭 calcite dissolves in stomach acid!! Just use quartz if you want a pretty gastrolith like 💀"
I like this site. Y’all just shotgunning counterfactual timelines
HEY HEY LISTEN THE VOICE OF THE MTA TRANSIT SYSTEM, ALL THE ANNOUNCEMENTS ON THE NYC SUBWAY LINE??
SHE'S A TRANS WOMAN AND TRANSITIONED AT 66!!!!!! THE BACKGROUND HUM OF MY CHILDHOOD, AND SHE'S LIKE ME!!!! WHAT THE FUCK
Ant #189,709,928,171 of Anthill #599,198,417 has just been promoted to Lance Corporal
War is hell