i just realised there’s no consequence for making a post that does poorly, now you’re all fucked

This post needs to do some serious numbers just to spite you for saying that

im in so much physical pain i might died

disgusting evil bastard muscle

the stingray

That’s your Trapezius, and its a muscle that everyone easily can and definitely SHOULD train regularly, particularly in our screen-centric world.

It’s really simple, hold a weight of some kind in each hand and do reps of shrugging your shoulders, lean over something and pull your weight from a fully extended arm up to your chest (Alternate sides), and stand upright and raise your arms from your sides to straight out at shoulder level, keeping your elbows straight.

if you train this and your Transverse Abdominis, you have a fantastic start on a strong, stable back that DOESN’T HURT!!!

Tumblr is weird because sometimes you go to a mutual's page and like/reblog half their content like you just broke in their house and imediately ate a little piece of all their food, tried out some of their clothes, sat on their sofa, and then just left.

And sometimes the mutual notices and does the same to your house.

And that's encouraged here. I love it.

Tips for redditers joining Tumblr:

you have to put on a skirt

🫡

😳

You sick fucks.... Ok, it's on, now what?

reblog my post boy

funny phrases to use when something goes wrong instead of jokingly saying "i'm going to kms":

feel free to add on

THIS ONE WINS

oh you know

What is homestuck? Is it like goncharov?

Yes, yes it is exactly like fucking Goncharov.

It's made up, it's not real, we just say this shit to mess with people who aren't in on the joke.

This is why I get meal kits. Do I need them? No. Can I easily make them myself? For way cheaper? Yes. WILL I??? No.

Other tips: if you are going to buy things that aren’t pre-taxed, you need to make a habit of always doing the prep AS SOON AS YOU GET HOME. it will NEVER HAPPEN if you don’t.

Get the bulk pack of steaks! But you are never gonna eat them before they go bad. If you freeze them in individual ziplocks as soon as you unpack you probably will?

Get the celery, but you need to cut it ALL UP and store it in the fridge in water or it will rot.

And don’t do all tgese at once, get like, one or two prep things a trip. You aren’t gonna get it started if it’s a huge task.

Don’t pass by these tips because you don’t have ADHD! 

These are valid points for the busy parent, the overstressed college student, and the person working the “wrong” shift. 

Real story - I have thrown away SO MUCH meat and produce in my time. Frozen veggies can even be better than fresh, since they are picked when ripe and frozen rather than picked early and expected to ripen in shipping. My local grocer will sometimes pre-chop less-than-desirable veggies and sell them in the discount cooler - a chopped onion is more useful than a whole one! Meat in bulk packs is WAY cheaper, but you have to make breaking up that huge pack part of putting away the groceries. Also, having a place to put the groceries away helps make the process easier. It’s taken me more than one decade of life to figure these things out. 

It’s not lazy if it is efficient. Professionals call it “time management.” 

Guys, GENUINELY USEFUL THING!

Get a vacuum sealer.

You can buy things that you won't eat all of before they go bad in bulk, seal them individually or in portion sizes, and freeze them to use one at a time, and they'll be good for well over a year for most things!

Buy your big ass pork loin, cut it into pork chops, seal it, and you can just have one pork chop whenever you want it!

Make use of your functional time to plan for your less functional times! It not only makes life work better, it also costs so much less if you're prepared!

Common tree shrew

GET HIS ASS

This animal looks fucking FAKE

the tree shrew is extremely similar in format to the 65 million year old mammals that survived the dinosaurs and their mass extinction to eventually became you and me.  

often referred to as a “living fossil” the little direct physical evidence we have indicates that they have undergone almost no evolutionary changes in at least the last 34 million years. One of gods perfect idiots, no need for revision

Perfect mammal, no notes

Guy wearing a harness at pride except it says "NERVOUS" on it

This is both performance art, and also extremely relatable.

they are friends they are friends they are friends

Spiderman is not, never has been, and never will be a narc.

They are studying us in petri dishes

It's only a petri dish if they won't willing jump in. Then we just call it a hot tub

boy now????

boy NOW

I always wondered why Nintendo called it a "switch", instant HRT, sweet!

Should go without saying but never date a cop and christ never marry one. Rule of thumb if he's legally untouchable he's ethically unfuckable. You don't like that cop, you like buff men in tight clothing. I can show you more of those, better ones. Take my hand.

burned honey knows what’s up

To take this seriously, at least two studies have found a rate of domestic abuse by police officers of about 40%, compared to the general population of about 10%. That's significant enough to be considered an outlier for the general population, and we also are fully aware that many cases of domestic violence by officers go unreported, or even if they are reported are not investigated, because the police side with their own.

So statistically speaking if you do date or marry a cop, you are AT LEAST 4 times more likely to suffer abuse at their hand.

Officers are often hand picked for aggression, low IQ, conservative ideology (if not outright hate), paranoia, and a tendency for reflexive violence, and honest ones are very often punished or chased out of law enforcement for it.

Your odds of getting a "good one" are pretty poor.

I MADE SEXUALITIES (and transgender) MINECRAFT TITLE CARDS

feel free to use these and tell me if you want any others, i don't know a lot about sexualities and genders but i am no one to judge

Why doesn't transgender get a creeper for an A?

the seal at the bottom of 瓷器 ciqi/chinese porcelain is handwritten

I can’t even comprehend this degree of delicacy, my own handwriting looks like I was holding the pen between my bum cheeks.

@dancinggrimm That was……that was perfect.

Maybe the video is just really old

Last I checked, most of these are made with a stamp.... So uh... We're witnessing a forgery...

I don’t think anything quite gets me like ‘grieving character starts wearing something of their dead loved ones,’ particularly if the clothing/jewelry/object/weapon was something that sorta trademarked that other character. It’s like the character is gone but you can still visually see their memory living on through those that loved them. It just hits so hard.

doubly so when the item ends up symbolically letting the dead character finish there business, there armor is shown deflecting an otherwise fatal blow from someone they protected , there sword is used to slay there arch nemesis and avenge there death, a wizards apprentices continues to learn from them by studying the notes left in there spellbook ect

It can be better! The item is irreparably damaged at the last moment, when the unfinished business is done, the jacket is burned or torn just as the killing blow lands, the sword shatters, but the shard still attached to the hilt pierces the heart of the enemy, the gun barrel finally cracks from years of hard use and neglect as the last bullet it ever needed to fire leaves it.

Then, the remains of that item are laid to rest with reverence, but a fragment is kept, a jewel from the swords pommel, the last fired brass from the gun, a button from the jacket.

I got kicked out from my family's barbecue party because I arrived on rollerblades and it was seen as really rude. So instead, I went with some friends to a new sushi restaurant that was owned by McDonald's for some reason, I sadly can't judge of the food as I woke up before I could order anything.

The exact moment that McDonald's tries to sell me sushi, I will just vanish into thin air, never to be seen again on this plane of existence.

i think we should talk about seika’s bra and choker more

hey can you remove her clothes instead

There you go.

That's an Ahoge, not to be confused with an ahegao

Man. The flagrant lack of critical reading skills and basic reading comprehension just makes me sad. There's a lot of joy in reading the English language that these people are missing out on. There's a clear INTEREST in reading and I feel like if we could just get people off this anti-intellectual streak everyone would be having much more fun reading Metamorphosis AND Twilight.

I genuinely hate this attitude that getting better reading comprehension skills will somehow keep you from enjoying your pulp romance or comic books or fanfiction. All a literature education does is give you more tools to analyze writing. It will only increase the joy of reading.

It's not the reading comprehension that's the problem, it's how it's taught. There is nothing that will make you hate reading like college reading comp classes which demand you over analyze, over criticize, and ignore the more obvious context in how some minutiae of detail effects it.

Academia can be amazing, it can also put you at the intellectual mercy of a person who has a completely false understanding of literature, and the authority to judge you on misunderstanding it as much as they do. Or just as bad, one of the victims of that kind of failure, who has had their ability to see things from a variety of perspectives beat out of them by it.

And it can put you under the scrutiny of elitists who reject and degrade literature, and belittle you for enjoying things

Man. The flagrant lack of critical reading skills and basic reading comprehension just makes me sad. There's a lot of joy in reading the English language that these people are missing out on. There's a clear INTEREST in reading and I feel like if we could just get people off this anti-intellectual streak everyone would be having much more fun reading Metamorphosis AND Twilight.

I genuinely hate this attitude that getting better reading comprehension skills will somehow keep you from enjoying your pulp romance or comic books or fanfiction. All a literature education does is give you more tools to analyze writing. It will only increase the joy of reading.