Top things to do in Cartagena, Colombia

Cartagena was the first Spanish colony in the Americas, and its location on the Caribbean Sea made it a vitally important port city. A gorgeous village on Colombia’s Caribbean coast, has excellent beaches, a historic old town and a extremely unique architecture. Showcasing all the history of Colombia, Cartagena has been the main attraction of thousands of tourists that visit this country. These…

Tips for Visiting Nowhere’sville

• Never stay past midnight. If someone tells you it’s time to leave, they mean it.
• If you arrive after midnight, you are safe to stay through the day, but beware of staying too long.
• The bed and breakfast offers cozy, cost effective lodgings. Be sure to use the elevator and not the stairs to get to your room. The stairs will take to somewhere you may not want to go.
• If you see someone who resembles you walking down mainstreet betwixt the hours of 12 and 2 on Wednesdays or alternating Fridays, it is you. For the sake of your own sanity, don’t approach them.
• The food from the diner is safe to eat, but don’t order the cherry pie. It’s for residents only.
• The free samples from the candy shop are delicious so long as the owner doesn’t ask for anything in return… like your name.
• Have you lost anything important to you? Ask a local to take you to the lake. Lost things always wash up on the shore, there. Even the things no one wants found.
• Should you hear singing coming from the church on a weekday, do not enter. The choir doesn’t like being interrupted.
• If the old lady on the corner of Mainstreet and XXX talks to you, listen to her advice. She’s never wrong.
• The people of Nowhere’sville are a friendly bunch. Feel free to mingle with them and make a few friends. They will remember you if you pass through again.
• Avoid asking questions about the nature of the mayor’s job description. Pretend not to be surprised when he pops up behind you in the strangest of places.
• After you leave, don’t bother trying to post any pictures on social media. No one will see them, anyway.

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