In honor of Threshold day, on which we celebrate the most insane episode in all of Star Trek I would like to throw out the following:
In a (hopefully not so distant) future Kathryn and Chakotay are finally getting married. Everyone is excited for it, most of all Harry, because he wins the betting pool. Well, Chakotay might also be kinda excited.
At the beautiful ceremony, our two lovebirds are made husband in wife among all their friends and loved ones. The sun is shining, the birds are singing and a light breeze is moving Kathryn’s luscious mane of auburn hair.
Chakotay has finally stopped dying his hair and it is at peak salt-and-pepper hotness. Of course, he is wearing his leather vest, because it can’t be a formal event unless vests are involved.
At the lively celebration, they are given a gorgeous piece of artwork by Phoebe, who has managed to capture the essence of their eternal love in all its complexity. The other gifts are all equally thoughtful.
Finally, the time for speeches has come. As Tom Paris raises his glass, all eyes rest on him. “Dear friends and family, Dear Chakotay, look at your beautiful wife. Always remember that I hit that first and that all the children you will have, will be siblings to the offspring I had with her and who you abandoned back in the Delta Quadrant.”
at the house of Rawk. When Doc yelled WAKE UP LIEUTENANT my kids started yelling it too, but they are too little to correctly pronounce lieutenant, so they are yelling WAKE UP MY FRIEND. I kinda love that.
Goddamnit I just thought of a really good joke (by my admittedly skewed standards) for Threshold Day and it’s going to have to go in the queue for almost an entire year (if this site still exists by then)
I have a question. Why did they assume the lizard babies wouldn’t turn into humans when janeway and Paris both turned back? What if those little lizard babies that could have turned into human babies???? They just left them behind???????????
People tend to get hung up on the fact that in Threshold Paris and Janeway turn into salamanders and have a bunch of kids (and there’s certainly a lot to get hung up over there), but the part that gets me is that… Paris’ plan to get home… totally works? And they just drop it? Turning into a horny lizard probably sucks, but if it means I’m not stranded in uncharted space for 70 years, I’ll bite the bullet and be a lizard for a day.
since it’s Threshold Day and i see people dragging the episode through the mud as usual - and, granted, it’s at least a little bit justified - let’s all stop and appreciate the really good things about Threshold:
seriously, Tom Paris’s transformation was spectacularly done as far as the makeup and prosthetics and so on
RDM acted the shit out of it
big turning point for Tom Paris in his evolution into a Good Boy
the doctor was more sarcastic all episode than he had ever been in anything up to that point
the doctor making increasingly bitter jokes as tom transforms more and more into a big sexy salamander
hearing tom’s backstory and suddenly understanding so much more about him
Why is the threshold lizard thing coming up now? Seems like all the VOY blogs I follow are posting it. I love that episode and all but I’m just curious as to why we all just decided that one was the one we were gonna meme. Any idea? 🐸🐸🦎
Threshold is always a causal meme throughout the year, however, today, January 29th, is a holiday for those of us who enjoy Threshold for it’s meme potential: today is the 22nd anniversary of the episodes release (aka Threshold Day)
I’m sorry I couldn’t get my third doodle done in time, so I’ll describe it for you!
After Seska refuses to even look at the lizards (and refuses to look at anyone after finding out they abandoned lizard children), Ensign Samantha Wildman - the ship’s resident xenobiologist who is criminally underutilised in the show - is called along.
Cue a whole second part to Threshold that we never saw, following Samantha studying the lizards and helping Voyager’s small (even smaller with no Tom Paris) medical team figure out What The Fuck To Do About This Whole Thing.
So Samantha Wildman with armfuls of lizards getting excited about her job while the senior staff look on in disbelief and Seska continues to rage.
Another Threshold doodle I thought about but didn’t have time to make:
After Kathryn is turned human again, Seska coils an arm around Janeway’s waist and is like “You and I have had our differences, but next time you want to turn into a reptile and make babies, you know where my quarters are.”
Kathryn is too busy doing her Grin Of Disbelief to remember to mention it was Tom’s “idea”, not hers.
I like to think that like Galafreyans touching the time vortex, the amphibian children of Paris and Janeway have special abilities (if a tardigrade can travel by spores…why not some amphibian warping) which means that they will make their way home to the parents that were stolen from them, a Delta Quadrant Incredible Journey if you will.
Is there fanfic about this already? 😂 Because I want to see the look on Mommy and Daddy’s faces when they make it home. Will Chakotay and Tuvok feel their vengeance? Sentient space-warping salamanders. It might be god awful, but I might need to make it happen.
Well, after having witnessed Voyager fans celebrate “Threshold” Day for the first time on tumblr, all I can say is that I’m glad that TOS fans don’t have a “Spock’s Brain” Day… or – Oh, sweet merciful Lord, please, no – do we?