I lost my sex drive when I gained a child.

I used to be a insanely sexual passionate person.

Now?

My knee jerk reaction is to push away any physical contact.

My body rarely belongs to me and I don’t want any more hands touching me.

Sex got complicated. And hard. And untrustworthy.

I had to make a really big life altering decision after sex resulted in a child.

I can’t mentally go through that right now so why would I want to have sex?

My dear good friend is off in the mountains surrounded by like minded people and I can’t help but feel a bit... envious?

I was hoping my little crew would be doing that too, especially by now.

I’m having a hard time living while we’re waiting to get to where we want togo.

It’s hard not having friends here. People to talk to.

I am so happy for her,

And I need to learn to be happy for me too.

Hormones and postpartum are weird and hard.

That’s all I wanted to say.