I'm hoping you can help me I am looking for a post with a gif set of a hannigram poolboy au But I can't find it anywhere I know I'm not crazy and someone did post something like that
I don’t remember a gif set but I did write a poolboy au several years ago here:
Can anyone else help out? Tumblr might’ve eaten it if they thought it was too “bad” for them.
Another thing I think I miss from school and don’t know how to access now, that I hadn’t thought of before - achievement at things I can do, without [necessity of] competition.*
If there’s a test on ‘can you do these math problems’ or ‘do you know these things’ and I can and do** - I can do well, and have that. And - if everyone else can and does - then [properly***] they can too, and - that’s awesome.
The noncurricular things I can think of for this kind of thing all tend to be competitions and - I don’t like those, and it wouldn’t at all do the same thing for me (and would be not pleasant.)
(*Which to be clear - I had access to and other people didn’t for reasons that aren’t fair and this is bad and should not be the case. An actually good way of doing this needs to be better at that.
**and, again, ‘and am lucky in some other areas’, which is a requirement thing for bad reasons.
***this is often not practically the case, which sucks. It should be.)
please, please, jiraiya if you're out there... PLEASE WRITE THE ICHA ICHA SERIES AGAIN PLEASE... i can still pet dogs and cook unnecessary amounts of aubergine dishes and con food out of my friends and i'm even fine with STILL not having any depth perception but I NEED MY SPECIAL INTEREST BACK PLEASE I CRAVE IT SO MUCH I CAN HARDLY REMEMBER THE CHARACTERS ANYMORE IT HURTS
THINGS I MISS, BUT I SHOULDN’T…
the taste of communion wine on my lips
as all the congregation takes a small sip
the never alone-ness at around midnight
the glow of a prayer on a cold winter night
the belief that there is a being graced with perfection
the belief they gave my life perfect direction
the swell of the music with someone to praise
the feeling He looked upon us with a heavenly gaze
the cool touch of a crucifix resting on my skin
always being welcomed back, always forgiven
the gathering of believers at a fireplace with tea
thinking and praying about who we’re meant to be
but in the end, once you’re gone, they make it clear when you leave
you can’t have these things if you do not believe
coffee on sunday’s not the same with atheist friends
you wonder why the bad things have to make the good things end
these are things I miss, but they tell me I shouldn’t
try as I might, there are things that I couldn’t
some sundays, when my hungover friends are sleeping
for hours my solitary tea stays steeping
waiting–come on, it’s time!– for the congregation to come
but the congregation isn’t coming, those days are done
sometimes I secretly wear a cross around my neck
a reminder of the times I’ve yet to forget
but those times are over, all my memories must be packed
despite what I miss, I can never come back.
I miss when I was thought that there was hope to happiness. I miss when I was happy. I miss going to school and having fun with my friends. I miss having friends. I miss the innocence of love and the hope for it. I miss having crushes and the hope that they would like me. I miss when Noa would play piano for me and I would secretly crush on him. I miss when he would tell me secrets and I would tell him mine. I miss that relationship. I miss Clay and the short time I shared with him. I miss being young. I miss not caring about school because it was just about fun. I miss the past. I wish I was young again.
Potential locations for that thing that is missing
Down the back of the sofa, in the attic, behind the radiator, in your other trousers, should we get the cat x-rayed, it's stuck to the ceiling, under the sofa, was it real to start with or just a concept, did you eat it, did I eat it, left it at the shops, it's inside the big bag of other bags, disintegrated into dust, in the undergrowth, in the toilet, under your hat, it's where you left it, you'll find out when the postcard arrives, let's retrace our route, in the fruit bowl, where the ransom note says it is, try your coat pocket, behind the bookcase, in your suitcase, in the baby, stolen, sold it, you're holding it, in the freezer, behind the cheese, have you seen youtube it's now in Greece, look in the first place you looked again, have you tried phoning it, it's behind your ear.
do you ever wonder how many people have cried over you?? cried because of something you did, or because they missed you, or because they were worried for you? I don't know I just think about that a lot