Yup, that’s depression for ya.
And I can tell you, from experience, that it will get better. Now it may be hard to believe me right now, because these just look like empty words when you’re that far gone, but seriously - it will get better.
Depression, or as I like to call it The Artist Henceforth Known As Shit Nibbler, is a hard thing to wrestle with. It’s something I’m currently wrestling with, like Leonardo DiCaprio against that bear. (Going as well as you would imagine it would go.) But the thing is, you gotta just keep on fighting it.
It’s really easy to give up and coast, sort of live out those fuzzy days where you don’t really remember if you showered yet, or if you fed the cats, or the last time you saw the sun. But you can’t. You just can’t.
I truly believe in a mixture of medicine and self-motivation. If it’s really bad, you need to see a medical professional. No question. But medicine won’t make everything 100% hunky-dory from then on out. It’s not a miracle cure. Some of it needs to come from you. And I know, “doing things” is the last thing you really want me telling you. Shit Nibbler makes you complicit in what it wants you to do, which is nothing. Ignore Shit Nibbler. Shit Nibbler is wrong. Focus on exercise, learn a new recipe, eat at someplace you’ve been meaning to visit, listen to a classic album, research a famous historical figure you only know the name of.
Often times, it helps get you out of that “funk,” the rut you’ve dug into. Your synapses will click in a different way, you see things from a new perspective, you ask questions that you hadn’t thought about asking before. Breaking out of the normal routine can often times make the monotony new and alive.
I was like that a little bit ago and it was rough. I’m still not better, I doubt I’ll ever be 100% but I’m at 90% so I call that a success. But I got here by remembering to take my medicine, exercising, and trying new things. As for getting your “ol’ creative noodle” (gosh, you’re cute) going, you can specifically try writing in another POV (like first, or third, whichever you don’t do often), or write in verse, or go on Pinterest and find pictures that remind you of familiar faces, far off places (maaaaaad world). Take a look at your past work and change the events of one minor thing, see where it takes your characters, watch the butterfly effect unfold. Write backwards, events from the end to the beginning. Retell one of your favorite myths. The possibilities are boundless. The end-game is just to write.
Know you’re not alone in this. You’ve got a lot of people going through this stuff too and we’re all here to help each other. If you ever need it, I’m click away.