lavenderfem
Reminder for ftms in the detranskink-- you ARE a real guy, trans men are men outside of this kink. This kink is a fantasy and doesn't actually define you as a person. You are the one in control with who you interact with and what you consent to. If something makes you uncomfortable, you're allowed to say no. You choose and are in control of when people misgender you while you're engaging with the kink.
Especially for ftm subs, never settle for someone who pushes your boundaries. You should be cared for and be taken into consideration outside of this kink. You're a person with thoughts and feelings. Please remember to take a break regularly, take care of yourself, indulge in gender affirming self care, drink water, and make sure you're not using this kink for self harm. watch out for your mental health 💕
If you see it, reblog it, someone's TL might need it
you all hate the position i sleep in because you haven’t advanced to my level and you’re jealous of my mental acuity and caustic wit as well as being extremely good at sleeping
this pornbot situation has gone too far
Did you get to see his dick at least?
briefly, then..
tragedy struck 💔
Dear Reddit and Twitter refugees:
You've probably already been told to change your icon, post and reblog stuff you like, Tumblr has holidays, etc.
But in case you weren't aware before....
When AO3 (Archive of Our Own) goes down for any reason, Tumblr flips the fuck out and panics. AO3 starts trending almost immediately.
Do NOT try to calm your neighbors down! Panicking with them until AO3 goes back up is the correct course of action.
Thank you and have a day.
how does it feel to be the funniest person on earth
What if what Aladdin meant by a whole new world, he was just gonna get Jasmine high as shit to see the world from a stoner’s point of view?
videogamecartridge
sometimes i randomly think about how much this post sucks and start laughing really hard
i've been super stressed and overworked lately so i've been craving a cigarette really badly but i quit years ago and i don't really want to buy a whole pack when i know i'll only smoke one or two of them anyway, so instead whenever i feel like i can't take it anymore i just vividly imagine myself taking a smoke break in my head and the crazy thing is it actually makes me feel better. i feel like the 4chan burger tulpa guy.
using my psionic powers to give myself a tasty little treat without succumbing to the weakneses of the flesh
You managed to retire from the supervillain game long ago, when you became a parent. Now, your grandchild has inadvertently been kidnapped by an upstart villain, and you’re about to show them why the world (rightfully) feared you.
Image description: A four page black and white comic of my tortoiseshell cat, Bunny, complaining that I won’t let her in from the screen porch.
Page 1
Panel 1: A small tortoiseshell cat sits on the other side of a glass door, looking up sadly, saying, “Mama! Mama, help! I’m in the screen porch!”
Panel 2: She scratches at the door. “Mama! Mama I’m trapped! I’m trapped in the screen porch! Mama!” she cries.
Panel 3: She looks through the glass with her sad, innocent expression. “I see you, Mama! Can’t you hear me? Why won’t you let me in? What have I done, Mama!”
Panel 4: The left corner is dominated by a close up of her face, as she reminisces about the cat tree in the screen porch. We see her perched on the very top, looking out over the backyard.
She says, “Was I not grateful enough, Mama? You gave me a throne, here in the screen porch! A place where I could look down upon the world as a god!”
Page 2
Panel 1: While she’s perched atop her cat tree, it begins to rain outside. Bunny looks askance at it from behind the screen.
“But I couldn’t touch it, Mama!” she narrates, now in boxes instead of word balloons, “I could see the rain lavish the earth, but never feel its cool caress!”
Panel 2: A paw rests on the screen. On the other side, two birds chirp, unbothered by the presence of Bunny.
“I could smell the blood of the song birds, but never taste its warmth! I lived as Tantalus in this screen porch, Mama!”
Panel 3: Sitting on a cushioned chair, bunny looks out over the yard, barred from her by the porch screen.
“Tormented by what I could never reach!”
Page 3
Panel 1 : Another reminiscence, this time of Bunny running through the open door to the screen porch earlier that day while I was taking out the garbage.
“And yet I returned, again and again and again! Was that my sin, Mama? Is this my punishment? To be condemned forever to a hell of my own choosing?”
Panel 2: Returning to the present, Bunny looks up from the otherside of the door, her eyes wide.
“Is this what you call justice, Mama?” She says. “Is this what you call love?”
Panel 3: From Bunny’s perspective we see me; I am ignoring her, going about my business. She calls out to me, “Answer me, Mama! Mama!”
Panel 4:I glance back at her, unmoved by her cries. “Mama!” she yells.
Page 4
Panel 1: Pulling out we finally see more of the wall which has the door to the screen porch. Directly beside it is a cat door that goes through the wall, out into the screen porch. Another cat, Bunny’s sister Maggie, is coming through the cat flap with no issue.
I say, “ Bunny, I know you know how to use the cat door.”
Clawing at the window, tears in her eyes, Bunny screams “MAMA!!”
End ID.
I feel like “is this what you call justice, Mama? is this what you call love?” is going to enter my “cats being dramatic” lexicon the same way “you KICK miette?” and “father is…evil?” have.
Image description: A four page black and white comic of my tortoiseshell cat, Bunny, complaining that I won’t let her in from the screen porch.
Page 1
Panel 1: A small tortoiseshell cat sits on the other side of a glass door, looking up sadly, saying, “Mama! Mama, help! I’m in the screen porch!”
Panel 2: She scratches at the door. “Mama! Mama I’m trapped! I’m trapped in the screen porch! Mama!” she cries.
Panel 3: She looks through the glass with her sad, innocent expression. “I see you, Mama! Can’t you hear me? Why won’t you let me in? What have I done, Mama!”
Panel 4: The left corner is dominated by a close up of her face, as she reminisces about the cat tree in the screen porch. We see her perched on the very top, looking out over the backyard.
She says, “Was I not grateful enough, Mama? You gave me a throne, here in the screen porch! A place where I could look down upon the world as a god!”
Page 2
Panel 1: While she’s perched atop her cat tree, it begins to rain outside. Bunny looks askance at it from behind the screen.
“But I couldn’t touch it, Mama!” she narrates, now in boxes instead of word balloons, “I could see the rain lavish the earth, but never feel its cool caress!”
Panel 2: A paw rests on the screen. On the other side, two birds chirp, unbothered by the presence of Bunny.
“I could smell the blood of the song birds, but never taste its warmth! I lived as Tantalus in this screen porch, Mama!”
Panel 3: Sitting on a cushioned chair, bunny looks out over the yard, barred from her by the porch screen.
“Tormented by what I could never reach!”
Page 3
Panel 1 : Another reminiscence, this time of Bunny running through the open door to the screen porch earlier that day while I was taking out the garbage.
“And yet I returned, again and again and again! Was that my sin, Mama? Is this my punishment? To be condemned forever to a hell of my own choosing?”
Panel 2: Returning to the present, Bunny looks up from the otherside of the door, her eyes wide.
“Is this what you call justice, Mama?” She says. “Is this what you call love?”
Panel 3: From Bunny’s perspective we see me; I am ignoring her, going about my business. She calls out to me, “Answer me, Mama! Mama!”
Panel 4:I glance back at her, unmoved by her cries. “Mama!” she yells.
Page 4
Panel 1: Pulling out we finally see more of the wall which has the door to the screen porch. Directly beside it is a cat door that goes through the wall, out into the screen porch. Another cat, Bunny’s sister Maggie, is coming through the cat flap with no issue.
I say, “ Bunny, I know you know how to use the cat door.”
Clawing at the window, tears in her eyes, Bunny screams “MAMA!!”
End ID.
I feel like “is this what you call justice, Mama? is this what you call love?” is going to enter my “cats being dramatic” lexicon the same way “you KICK miette?” and “father is…evil?” have.
truly possessed with envy any time i drive by someone sitting on their porch with a beverage
made this post bc I saw a fat man with a mustache zonked out in a rocking chair and it made me so jealous that I almost threw up