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marriage is scary, what if he isn't Pedro Pascal?
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Dear Liam,
It's been almost 2 months and it seems the world has moved on. There's talk of a 1D reunion and the boys reconciling, and I bitterly wonder why it took your death. Why couldn't you still be around to be part of it? I keep thinking of your family and their first holiday season without you. I can't wrap my head around any of it. It's all so unfair. I wish I had something more positive to say, but I miss you being alive. I'm so sorry you're no longer around. You deserved more time, for yourself and your family. Perhaps one day thinking of you won't hurt, but it's still too soon for me, even as the world turns and everyone else has moved past it. At least you're not hurting anymore. I wish I believed in more than the limits of this life. Thanks for the lovely music and memories, though. For sharing your talent with us. It was much too short but I'm grateful you existed in the same time as I did. 🖤 I know we're strangers, but from one human to another, you are loved and will always be remembered. 🤍
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"Vas Happening London??!!" - Zayn 2024
Source: x.com
this wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card but this makes me SO HAPPY
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I can't stop thinking about the one direction boys.
Louis, losing yet ANOTHER majorly important person in his life. His best friend. His songwriting partner for so many years. His brother. I hope he's not asking himself if he couldve done more. If he missed the signs. How much suffering does one person withstand.
Niall, the last to see him. I had this friend who I was as thick as thieves with years ago, when I saw her again after graduating it never felt the same. Because we're so different now. I stopped hanging out with her because that difference made me uncomfortable. I wonder if niall felt like that, was it a little weird? A little awkward? or did he feel like no time has passed at all and they picked up exactly where they left of? I wonder if he feels guilty because he got to have that one final goodbye and the rest didn't like some sort of survirors guilt. If he didn't see the warning signs. If he's going over their final interaction over and over and over. The last time I saw my grandmother was 2 days before she died and I play that interaction over and over and over and over.
Harry, who liam previously described as "having a sixth sense for when I'm struggling", and harry who described the death of another friend as the reason he always tries to check up on others. I wonder how long its been since they spoke. I wonder if harry feels unimaginable amounts of guilt for not seeing it. For not reaching out more. For not publicly acknowledging liam when his solo fans where bullying liam even though he preaches tpwk.
Zayn. God, zayn. Zayn who always thought they'd eventually get over their issues. Make their way back. Zayn who only months prior was discussing wanting to reach out and how he's been reminiscing and looking back at one direction much more fondly and much less bitterly. God I know he feels like he's just a day too late. If he had reached out just one day earlier, he would've been on good terms with liam. He would've had that at least. His post made me think of some friends i had to cut off. They were my favorite people in the world but too much had went down. I bawled. Life is so fucking short. They ruined my life and i shouldn't reach out but life is so fucking short. I don't want to wake up to one of them dead.
God I hope they're okay. I wish I could take it all away.
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happy thanksgiving
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where the fuck would we be without garlic honestly
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ugh why must I be always so repulsed by my own vulnerability but I find it very moving and impressive if other people are vulnerable with me????
Brené Brown, Daring Greatly
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You know what really pisses me off? The rewriting of history. People want to pretend like the only reason Liam Payne was getting hate was because of the allegation. But I call bullshit. 99% of the people hating him online had no idea about the allegations or didn't care. They were bullying him online because they thought he was "cringe."
The latest wave of bullying online, which I saw weeks before his death, had nothing to do with the allegations. It had to do with him dancing at Niall's concert. The hate started with the Logan Paul interview, where Liam didn't say anything that warranted being dogpiled by the internet. And it never stopped.
Now, people want to rewrite history and pretend Liam wasn't bullied and humiliated for just being himself because it was "cringe." But you can't because that's the truth. Imagine bullying someone online because you thought he danced weirdly or was cringe. Then they get all defensive afterwards, sprouting bullshit about how they're "allowed to have an opinion." Yeah, and your opinion has real-life consequences.
Some of you want to pretend like Liam Payne hadn't been the internet's punching bag for years. Enough.