Please help spreading the word.

@ Biden campaign you need to get “I’m a single issue voter and my issue is NO MALARKEY” on a t-shirt as soon as physically possible

yes 2020 has sucked like a ravenous kirby but in november we finally get to vote that hateful orange turd out of office so eyes on the prize ya’lls

Ok but.. who are we voting in??? Both candidates suck. Gaud help I’ve never voted before.

ffs will someone PLEASE explain why voting in another shoddy white male liberal is VASTLY DIFFERENT from allowing a fascist republican to remain in office?

basically you’re voting for the ADMINISTRATION and the PARTY not the person. also: Biden is crummy. Trump is actively killing hundreds of thousands of people. There is a fucking difference. Not recognizing that difference is what got us Trump in the first place. It’s the difference between a landlord who refuses to perform repairs, and one who ACTIVELY SETS YOUR HOUSE ON FIRE. Do not let let the republican propaganda machine convince you they are the same. 

Register To Vote.

Biden believes in the system. He’ll staff the State Department and release his tax returns and listen to his daily briefing.

He won’t send anonymous stormtroopers to snatch people off the street and hold them for hours.

He won’t spend all his time every day on Twitter and react poorly to every single word that isn’t glowing with praise.

There are SO MANY differences between them.

If your choices are half an onion in a baggy that’s been in the fridge a bit too long and developed some mold, and a napalm-filled flaming dumpster that is barrelling at ninety miles an hour towards an elementary school playground, you have the moral obligation to vote for the moldy onion.

And then you support the fresher onions in the Onion House and Onion Senate, and do activism to make the moldy onion scrape some of its mold off, and by the way the fact that people were supporting fresher onions in the onion primary is already paying off in that the moldy onion’s policies have noticeably less mold than they might have a few years ago … look, this analogy has thoroughly gotten away from me, but I hope the first part was clear enough.   Moldy Onion 2020, let’s go.

Moldy Onion 2020

Moldy Onion 2020

Friendly reminder that Ruth Bader Ginsburg is 87 years old and has cancer for the fifth time and whoever wins in November will likely get to appoint her replacement who will sit on the Supreme Court for the next 30-40 years

Biden has committed that he will appoint the first black woman to the Supreme Court

Trump appointed a rapist who wants to overturn Roe v Wade (among other things)

Y'all want a badass Justice like Sonia Sotomayor or another rapist who wants to destroy your rights?

You’re not just voting for a President for four years, you’re voting for judges for the next forty

monthly fic rec agaaaain!

Here be the fics I enjoyed from July. Can y’all believe it is August right now?  What the heck is time?

Fic: my heart in two hundred-eight letters Author: HestiaForever ( @supersonic-womanofyou) Fandom: Check, Please! Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Rating: General Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Eli Parker @Eli92847 OMG several members of #teamcanada’s hockey team are literally sitting one section over from me at the team men’s free skate I’m QUAKING #winterolympics #pyeongchang2018

Eli Parker @Eli92847 I kid you not Jack Zimmermann literally just JUMPED out of his seat to cheer for Eric Bittle @omgquadlutzplease

Eli Parker @Eli92847 This is SO CUTE

Eli Parker @Eli92847 My Canadian self is kinda offended bc THAT’S TREASON but also Hockey Robot Jack Zimmermann TM seems so excited about FIGURE SKATING of all things I’ll let it slide

Fic: Do You Believe In Destiny? Author: marc0bot ( @b1ttle) Fandom: Check, Please! Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Fresh out of college, Eric was hired to bring the Falconers’ new mascot, Destiny, to life. His new job, though difficult at times, was extremely rewarding; the fans and even the slightly intimidating roster of players loved the new addition to the franchise…

All except for one, and Eric was determined to change his mind.

Fic: Ready to Start Author: sunfair Fandom: Check, Please! Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Rating: General Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Bitty returns to Samwell and Jack likes his haircut

Fic: Camp Sweetgum Author: onawingandaswear ( @whoacanada)

Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann

Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Summary: Camp Sweetgum shares lakefront with a private resort and senior counselor Eric Bittle is used to wealthy, entitled people wandering into his camp. (He isn’t used to them awkwardly hitting on him, though.)

A story about botched summer romances, misunderstandings, and enabling parents.

Fic: A Romantic Interlude Author: Creative_Cabbage ( @creative_cabbage) Fandom: Check, Please! Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: When Bitty had asked Jack what he wanted to do for his 30th birthday He had not expected Jack to suggest a weekend in the northern climate of Montreal, fishing and boating at the cabin his parents had always rented as a child. However, it was his husband’s birthday and his dearest wish, so they packed their bags - and their daughter - and headed north.

Fic: make my heart a double bed Author: cleardishwashers ( @flybittybooty) Fandom: Check, Please! Relationship: Eric “Bitty” Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Bitty arrives two weeks early to a room with so much CAUTION! tape over the door that he can’t even see inside, a captain whose face somehow conveys pure irritation and sincere apology at the same time, and a very stoned and very skinny Shitty. Or: the one where Bitty and Jack have to room together.

Fic: baseball babes Author: patricksdavid ( @patricksdavid) Fandom: Schitt’s Creek Relationship: Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Stevie Budd/Alexis Rose Rating: General Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Alexis and David support their baseball playing partners

Hey all y'all Americans out there please keep this in mind, make sure your votes count and oust the cheeto from the White House

Vote Blue

In 2016, over 75,000 mail-in ballots were left uncounted and discarded because they were received after  mail-in voting deadlines, which all vary by state, according to CBS news. 

Some states like California allow you to check with the Registrar of Voters on-line to verify both if a ballot has issued and if it was received to help prevent voting errors.

Remember, the most common forms of voter fraud are 1) gerrymandering, 2) voter suppression and 3) foreign participation through both lobbying and online misinformation. 

dead metaphors are really interesting honestly and specifically i’m interested in when they become malapropisms

like, the concept being, people are familiar with the phrase and what people use it to mean metaphorically, but it’s not common knowledge anymore what the metaphor was in literal reference to. people still say “toe the line” but don’t necessarily conjure up the image of people standing at the starting line of a race, forbidden from crossing over it. people still say “the cat is out of the bag” without necessarily knowing it’s a sailors’ expression referring to a whip being brought out for punishment. some metaphors are so dead we don’t even know where they come from; like, there are ideas about what “by hook or by crook” references, but no one is entirely sure. nobody knows what the whole nine yards are.

and then you throw in a malaprop or a mondegreen or two, where because people don’t know what the actual words of the expression refer to, they’re liable to replace them with similar sounding words (see “lack toast and tolerant”). so we can literally go from a phrase referencing a common, everyday part of life to a set of unfixed, contextless sounds with a completely different meaning. that’s fascinating. what an interesting piece of the way language and culture are living, changing, coevolving things.

maybe part of the reason we can’t figure out where some phrases come from is that over time the words themselves have changed! one of the theories about “the whole nine yards” is that it’s a variant of “the whole ball of wax,” which some people further theorize was originally “the whole bailiwick,” meaning just “the whole area”! the addition of “nine yards” might be related to “dressed to the nines,” which might reference the fucking Greek muses! language is so weird and cool! (and I only know any idioms in two languages!)

the point is. I just came across the words “nip it in the butt” in a piece of published, professional fiction, and now I can’t stop giggling.

Here’s the thing about “a few bad apples.” It comes from “One bad apple spoils the bunch.” And it’s true, if you have a barrel of apples and one is rotten, it will release ethylene gas. This will force the other apples to over-ripen and begin to rot as well. One bad apple isn’t an unfortunate addition. It’s a taint, the beginning of total decay, the ruination of an entire batch.

So if you have a bad apple, you spot it as soon as you can. You isolate it from the other, fresh apples. You throw it away with the trash. You DO NOT halfheartedly put the bad apple to the side, park it behind or desk or send it home with pay for a few weeks. You REMOVE it, permanently. You don’t take it out of the barrel and look the other way when it ends up in another district’s barrel, creating repeat offenses. 

You do not create a false brotherhood, a pack of apples, a code of “apples always stick up for apples, no matter what.” Because then that bad apple is still there. It has spread its decay and infested the whole crop, because no one wants to address the spreading and systemic badness of the apple.

You take that motherfucking bad apple and you throw it in the compost heap and let it shrivel into dirt into nothing before it can poison anything else. 

Otherwise, you don’t have one bad apple. You have a whole spoiled bunch. And then you gave that nasty, smelly, mealy, rotten orchard a bunch of riot gear and tell them they are better than the rest of the fruit on the farm and that it is their GOD GIVEN RIGHT to smash every pear, papaya, watermelon, strawberry, or pineapple that dissents. 

obviously this isn’t a metaphor or anything i’m just really passionate about orchard maintenance

my entire brain is the scene in brooklyn 99 where jake is interrogating someone and he’s playing guitar and just fucking screaming

No one: Literally no one: Me: Pride and Prejudice as told by John Mulaney gifs/pics

Buckle up because this is going to be one LONG post (and I’m not gonna hide my work under a read more)

The Bennet’s have five daughters—Jane, Elizabeth, Mary, Kitty, and Lydia, who are all single which stresses Mrs. Bennet a lot.

One night everybody is enjoying a town dance

And two wealthy and eligible bachelors Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bingley (and his sister Caroline Bingley) show up all

Jane and Bingley are taken by each other and dance but Darcy makes some comments about Lizzy.

Days later, Mr. Collins, the clergyman who will inherit everything when Mr. Bennett inevitably dies, shows up. He’s weird and no one likes him.

The militia and Lieutenant Wickham arrive in town. He speaks badly about Darcy and Lizzy is all:

Lizzy looks for Wickham at the ball Bingley’s hosting, but she ends up dancing with Darcy instead

All while Mrs. Bennett is spreading lies about her whole family

Collins proposes to Lizzy and she says no

The Bingley’s leave town and Jane is heartbroken but like all the characters in this story

Lizzy’s best friend Charlotte shows up and says Collins proposed and she accepted.

A couple of months later she visits Charlotte and Collins. She is invited to Lady Catherine de Bourgh’s home. She’s Darcy’s aunt and Collin’s patroness.

The next day, Darcy runs up tells Lizzy he loves her “most ardently” despite her “lower rank” and Lizzy is all:

She rejects him and travels with some family, eventually ending up at Darcy’s mansion and internally is all:

Darcy is actually ay his house and Lizzy bumps into him

Lizzy gets a letter from her father and it turns out Wickham was horrible and just wants money in exchange for running off with Lydia.

Lydia still ran off with Wickham because she’s all

Mr. Bennett searches for Lydia and she eventually marries Wickham. It’s all awkward but Mrs. Bennett is

Lizzy finds out that Darcy paid Wickham

Bingley returns and proposes to Jane

Lady Catherine de Bourgh shows up in the dead of night and tells Lizzy she can’t marry Darcy and Lizzy is all “he hasn’t asked me!”

The next morning Darcy proposes to Lizzy

And she says:

~ FIN ~

Yep.

And this goes for everything. 

Don’t want to refer a female patient for an abortion? Don’t be a doctor.

Don’t want to prescribe birth control? Don’t be a doctor and ESPECIALLY don’t be an obgyn.

Don’t want to treat a trans person? GTFO of this field.

Don’t want to treat someone who is incarcerated? BYE.

Don’t want to treat someone with HIV or Hep C or who is a sex worker? OUT.

If there is any scenario where you feel you won’t be able to treat or refer someone? You’re not a doctor, you’re a barrier to care and that goes against your oath.

#JusticeForBreonnaTaylor

The police officers were at the wrong home, in the middle of the night, serving a no-knock warrant thinking they would find drugs at the residence (which they did not, as neither Kenneth nor Breonna were drug dealers, nor was their home a trap house). Kenneth was frightened and thought the house was being broken into, and he fired one shot thinking he was defending the lives of his girlfriend and himself. Breonna was then shot EIGHT times and passed away.

He was charged with the attempted murder murder of a police officer and assault, despite not knowing at the time that those were officers, not burglars breaking in (they were plain-clothed, and Breonna and Kenneth were innocent of any crime, so how would he know), and a police sergeant intentionally omitted that information in front of the grand jury. The sergeant also did not mention that Breonna was killed by police at the scene when they shot at the pair, in fact - she didn't even mention her existence, and her testimony played a crucial role in the grand jury choosing to charge Kenneth with what they did. Sergeant Amanda Seelye misled them severely.

Seelye also told the grand jury that officers knocked, repeatedly announced themselves and then procceeded to break the door open and were immediately met by gunfire, which has been disputed by SIX WITNESSES that say there was no knocking or announcing. The mentioned "gunfire" was a single bullet.

The attempted murder charge has been dropped I believe, still no where near good enough but it's a start.

Now the real culprits need to be charged over Breonna's MURDER and everything else they did to her and Kenneth.

I made this post weeks ago and it angers me so much that we're not even an inch closer to having Breonna's killers held accountable for their actions. I keep thinking about her mom and Kenneth and how they are doing and it just... this isn't right. Breonna's life was taken from her in such a horrible, senseless way.

I want the perps arrested and I want Yanil to receive all the help he needs after this traumatic and violent experience. The video is horrible.

The poor child is just left lying there, holding his face while none of his "friends" do anything. How are they so calm. Who filmed this??? I hope they trace it back to the perps! They clearly felt proud about attacking a child to the point of laughing about it and recording it with their phones, 10-20 vs a single boy, how noble, how brave. Hope they get jail time for like traumatizing Yanil for life.

This is disgusting and whilst I check dutch daily I hadnt come across it. I specifically searched google.nl for Dutch articles and there are just a few. This horrible act needs to be better known.

The worst part is that one of the laughing perps felt brave enough to post this to his Insta and bragged about it and said he didn't care about criticism because this got him attention 🤢🤢 and the video got back to poor Yanil who had to see it everywhere online. The perp closed his account now, little racist is not so brave anymore?

this needs more attention. a child shouldn't have to fear being outside in case someone nearby would hurt them. anyone shouldn't have to fear being outside inncase someone nearby would hurt them.

this is why we're reforming the world.

To all of the Dutch people on here - please keep us updated about this case!

SHUKRI ABDI 2007 - 2019 (12 years old) Manchester, England, United Kingdom 

‘If you don’t get into the water, I’m going to kill you.’

Shukri Abdi was a 12 year old Somalian girl who was born and brought up in a refugee camp in Kenya having escaped conflict in Somalia. She arrived in the UK in 2017 and experienced horrific bullying from her classmates who called her ‘coloured’ and ‘half-caste’. 

In 2017 her body was found in the River Irwell, when police arrived children were still laughing as Shukri drowned. Greater Manchester police quickly declared the incident an accident. 

“Child Four said that Shukri seemed untroubled in the deeper water when she had her arm on Child One’s shoulder, but appeared to get into difficulties when Child One let go of her and swam back to the other children.”

“Then Shukri’s head went under and came back up. I think she was trying to say something but she couldn’t, trying to call out but she couldn’t,” Child Four told the court.  

Child Four was asked by the court if Child One was laughing when they could see Shukri struggling and sumberging beneath the surface.

Child Four replied “Yes” and said they presumed it was because they thought Shukri was joking about drowning, but Child Four said they could see Shukri wasn’t joking. Child Four jumped in the water to try to save Shukri. Child Three ran to get a stick to try to pull Shukri out.

“Child One was laughing for a couple of minutes,” Child Four told the inquest. “Child One was still laughing when me and Child Three were trying to help. Child One was still laughing when I jumped in.”

Child Four said that neither Child One nor Child Two were doing anything while Shukri was drowning, and that Child One only stopped laughing when the police came.

After jumping into the water to try to save Shukri, Child Four realised they would not be able to save her, so ran to the nearby Bury police station to alert them. Child Three did the same.

Child Four said that Child Three blamed Child One for the tragedy “because they let go of Shukri”.

- The Guardian 

It is claimed by the other children CH1 said ‘If you don’t get into the water, I’m going to kill you’ to Shukri before the incident. This was intentional and not an accident. Shukri, her poor mother and dear siblings deserve justice. They came to this country thinking they were going to be safe. Manchester claims to be open and honest and loving and yet a vulnerable child has died in their city. You need to be screaming for Justice. Inquests are not enough and not fast enough, not for Shukri, not for her mother. Justice. 

PETITION | DONATE 

Writer: There Was Only One Bed…

Smut fans: *gasp!!!!!*

Writer: So They Spooned All Night And The Brooding One Allowed Themselves To Feel Vulnerable For The First Time In Years And The Chirpy One Got Some Quality Snuggles

Fluff fans: *GASP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

Alternatively:

There was only one bed and so they lay there together, only inches apart physically but it may as well have been miles for neither could muster the courage to tell the other the true depth of their feelings and so they lay there sleepless in their mutual pining

Angst fans:

There was only one bed. A carried B to it and gently eased them down. They were both badly injured but B’s conditions were much worse and A wouldn’t rest until they knew B was going to be alright. So A sat down next to B and brushed their hair back, holding their hand as B shivered through the night, their only comfort A’s presence by their side.

Hurt/Comfort fans:

Dear god you’re right, you’re so right

I feel like this needs to be a writing challenge… How many different ways can you write this one trope.

There was only one bed, but instead of making a big fuss, the tired pair went the fuck to sleep and got a full 8 hours.

My sleep deprived ass:

OH YEAH THAT’S THE GOOD STUFF

99% of all murders committed by women in ancient greek plays are completely justified

Clytemnestra: crack? Is it crack you smoke?