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Mostly-Gay Writing Sideblog

@suitov / suitov.tumblr.com

For writing stuff. See the About & Welcome page. [Mobile header credit: Marshall Reyher, CC-BY 4.0]
Hajime: H-hey, can I kiss you?
Nagito: Evidence thus far suggests not, despite constant hinting.
Hajime: Oh. O-ok, that's fine, uh, sorry.
Nagito: ...
Nagito: Despite constant hinting.
Hajime: I haven't been hinting, I don't think.
Nagito: But I'm willing to be proven wrong.
Hajime: No, no, don't worry, I'm fine as just friends, please forget I asked, it was just stupid, I...
Nagito: [SIGH]
Nagito: Reserve, please would you kiss me?
Hajime: Huh? Wait, rea-- OK!!
Izuru: You are made of fluff and kisses.
Nagito: Ah... well, I knew about the fluff, but I don't see any--
Izuru: [kiss]
Nagito: I see. My mistake.
Izuru: That was my very funny prank. ...you are not laughing.
Nagito: Ahaha! I was... merely... momentarily overwhelmed by your impeccable sense of humour, haha...
Izuru: [satisfied rumble]
Hiyoko: (Did he actually think he was being funny?)
Mahiru: (I can't tell.)
Hiyoko: (They're such dorks.)
Mahiru: [kiss]
Hiyoko: How dare!!!
Hiyoko: Do it again.
Chiaki: So you get what I'm saying...
Junko: Yeah.
Chiaki: That if I press and hold A, even if I hold it for a long time, that's still one single button press?
Junko: Sure.
Chiaki: And even if I go through a screen transition while I'm holding the button down, it's still only been pressed once?
Junko: Yeah, clearly, cus like your finger didn't move off the button.
Chiaki: And furthermore, if I don't let go of the button, then I haven't completed a full A press, because a complete button push involves both depressing and releasing the button in order to return it to a state where I can press it again?
Junko: Yeah, duh.
Chiaki: Which means, I completed this stage in 2.5 A presses.
Junko: No.
Chiaki: ...
Junko: An A press is an A press. You can't say it's only a half.
Chiaki: ...
Chiaki: ...
Chiaki: I'm joining despair.
Junko: -y!
Chiaki: ?
Junko: Half a yay.
Fuyuhiko: I'm serious. You can ask Peko. Ask her if the D Club is real and what it was.
Izuru: If you wish.
Fuyuhiko: Doubting the D Club...
Kazuichi: It's heresy, man.
Izuru: I'm back.
Fuyuhiko: And?
Izuru: She said I'm too young to know what it is.
Fuyuhiko: Wait, what.
Izuru: And she said to tell you to stop corrupting the innocent baby hope.
Fuyuhiko: Hey!
Nagito: Yes, that's my job.
Kazuichi: That's not fair! She's making it sound weird!
Izuru: It is strange. I expected her to be the expert on swordplay.
Fuyuhiko: ...
Fuyuhiko: Is... was that a joke just now?
Izuru: No.
Kazuichi: Did he think it was literal swords?!
Izuru: Oh, wooden ones?
Kazuichi: I mean wood was involved yea.
Chiaki: Of course you have Uno! It came free with your Xbox!
Junko: I don't fucking have Uno you Reservefucker!
Chiaki: It's freaking Uno, it's free! Go to it in the arcade and you'll be able to download it for--
Junko: I don't have Two, I don't have Three, I don't have fucking Four, I don't have Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten or Eleven--
Chiaki: You don't know a godsdamn thing--
Junko, muting the mic: You were right, hotness. This is way funnier than killing her.
Izuru: Told you.
Chiaki: YOU HAVE UNO YOU FREAKING DICK
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Nagito: Really? The Ultimate of Ultimates doesn't enjoy anything?
Izuru: Everything is the same to me. It is all unbearably boring.
Nagito: So you don't dislike anything either?
Izuru: ...
Nagito: Apart from myself, of course. That goes without saying.
Izuru: I suppose... some things are more boring than others...
Izuru: Loud noises, for example.
Nagito: Well, on that point we agree.
Izuru: And... spiky textures. Labels on the inside of clothing. Excess ginger. Things that are not straight.
Nagito: Ah.
Izuru: Misused apostrophes.
Nagito: But then, wouldn't the opposite of some of those things be enjoyable by default? Peace and quiet? Good grammar? Whatever the opposite of spiky is?
Izuru: But predictability is also boring. There is no escape from boredom.
Nagito: My poor Hope.
Izuru: What is the opposite of spiky?
Nagito: Er, maybe a sponge? Because it has holes instead of spikes?
Izuru: Maybe.
Nagito: If my lord would like a sponge bath for research purposes, I'll gladly help. I've been in hospital enough times to count as an expert!
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Hiyoko: Three minutes! New record! Everyone pay up!
Nagito: Huh?
Hiyoko: Three minutes you were next to him before you said something horny.
Nagito: I was not being--! I was offering my help!
Mikan: u,,,um,,,,,
Nagito: Being in hospital isn't sexy, you know. Losing your dignity completely. Being that reliant. Imposing on others for your every pathetic need...
Hiyoko: Even if there's a hot male nurse?
Nagito: I. I mean. That. It can help you feel a. Little less.
Nekomaru: Leave the kid alone, Hiyoko. Hospital's no holiday.
Nagito: [grateful stuttering]
Nekomaru: Besides, what's wrong with be-- eh? What's this?
Izuru: It is a cake for good behaviour.
Nekomaru: Did you just have this somewhere?
Teruteru: Excellent ganache...
Nagito: Really? The Ultimate of Ultimates doesn't enjoy anything?
Izuru: Everything is the same to me. It is all unbearably boring.
Nagito: So you don't dislike anything either?
Izuru: ...
Nagito: Apart from myself, of course. That goes without saying.
Izuru: I suppose... some things are more boring than others...
Izuru: Loud noises, for example.
Nagito: Well, on that point we agree.
Izuru: And... spiky textures. Labels on the inside of clothing. Excess ginger. Things that are not straight.
Nagito: Ah.
Izuru: Misused apostrophes.
Nagito: But then, wouldn't the opposite of some of those things be enjoyable by default? Peace and quiet? Good grammar? Whatever the opposite of spiky is?
Izuru: But predictability is also boring. There is no escape from boredom.
Nagito: My poor Hope.
Izuru: What is the opposite of spiky?
Nagito: Er, maybe a sponge? Because it has holes instead of spikes?
Izuru: Maybe.
Nagito: If my lord would like a sponge bath for research purposes, I'll gladly help. I've been in hospital enough times to count as an expert!
Nagito: Well, he was right. Unremarkable, ordinary humans from your side of the school DO exist to serve their betters.
Hajime: That's... harsh...
Nagito: You can't complain about the natural order.
Hajime: I don't want to accept it.
Nagito: Especially those of their betters who need a little kissy.
Hajime: ...
Hajime: HEY! Wait a minute!
Nagito, all innocence: What?
Hajime: So it was self-serving all along, huh?
Nagito: Well, if nobody else is going to serve me.
Hajime: Just for that, you DON'T get a little kissy.
Nagito: What terrible service. I rate this fountain one star.
Five minutes later: (they are kissing)
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fuckyuhiko: hey can someone help
fuckyuhiko: izuru is hugging me
lucky77: didn't he ask permission? that's not like Izuru!
fuckyuhiko: he asked
lucky77: ah, fuyuhiko, you're blessed to be the recipient of Izuru hugs! i'm almost jealous!
miodaaaaaaaa: but izzy hands hugs out like candy!
miodaaaaaaaa: come to think of it, he hands out baked goods and candy like candy too!
Mahiru: He keeps saying he's bribing people to be friends with him. I never know if he's joking.
lucky77: he is!
fuckyuhiko: k but whats not a joke is
fuckyuhiko: hes still huggin
lucky77: you can ask him to stop! he'll do it right away!
fuckyuhiko: yeah but
fuckyuhiko: uh
fuckyuhiko: id feel bad
Pekoyama: I'm on my way.
miodaaaaaaaa: fuyu is such a softie ^w^
fuckyuhiko: hey fuck you take that back
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miodaaaaaaaa: sofffffftttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiihikoooo
*One participant has liked this message: Pekoyama
fuckyuhiko: youre both dead to me
fuckyuhiko: peko youre fired
miodaaaaaaaa: some1 look and tell us if he's blushing irl
memeticallyEngineered: I know the answer but he says I'm not allowed to say.
lucky77: that's a confession!
KonamiCoed: Yeah.
fuckyuhiko: youre all dead im calling in the hit right now
memeticallyEngineered: He's pretending to be on the phone.
fuckyuhiko: STOP NARRATING
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Fuyuhiko, throughout this exchange, remains dangling from Izuru's arms like a Somewhat Disgruntled Cat.

(Bonus Izuru dropping off his boyfriend with a classmate to be babysat)

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fuckyuhiko: hey can someone help
fuckyuhiko: izuru is hugging me
lucky77: didn't he ask permission? that's not like Izuru!
fuckyuhiko: he asked
lucky77: ah, fuyuhiko, you're blessed to be the recipient of Izuru hugs! i'm almost jealous!
miodaaaaaaaa: but izzy hands hugs out like candy!
miodaaaaaaaa: come to think of it, he hands out baked goods and candy like candy too!
Mahiru: He keeps saying he's bribing people to be friends with him. I never know if he's joking.
lucky77: he is!
fuckyuhiko: k but whats not a joke is
fuckyuhiko: hes still huggin
lucky77: you can ask him to stop! he'll do it right away!
fuckyuhiko: yeah but
fuckyuhiko: uh
fuckyuhiko: id feel bad
Pekoyama: I'm on my way.
miodaaaaaaaa: fuyu is such a softie ^w^
fuckyuhiko: hey fuck you take that back
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miodaaaaaaaa: sofffffftttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiihikoooo
*One participant has liked this message: Pekoyama
fuckyuhiko: youre both dead to me
fuckyuhiko: peko youre fired
miodaaaaaaaa: some1 look and tell us if he's blushing irl
memeticallyEngineered: I know the answer but he says I'm not allowed to say.
lucky77: that's a confession!
KonamiCoed: Yeah.
fuckyuhiko: youre all dead im calling in the hit right now
memeticallyEngineered: He's pretending to be on the phone.
fuckyuhiko: STOP NARRATING
fuckyuhiko: hey can someone help
fuckyuhiko: izuru is hugging me
lucky77: didn't he ask permission? that's not like Izuru!
fuckyuhiko: he asked
lucky77: ah, fuyuhiko, you're blessed to be the recipient of Izuru hugs! i'm almost jealous!
miodaaaaaaaa: but izzy hands hugs out like candy!
miodaaaaaaaa: come to think of it, he hands out baked goods and candy like candy too!
Mahiru: He keeps saying he's bribing people to be friends with him. I never know if he's joking.
lucky77: he is!
fuckyuhiko: k but whats not a joke is
fuckyuhiko: hes still huggin
lucky77: you can ask him to stop! he'll do it right away!
fuckyuhiko: yeah but
fuckyuhiko: uh
fuckyuhiko: id feel bad
Pekoyama: I'm on my way.
miodaaaaaaaa: fuyu is such a softie ^w^
fuckyuhiko: hey fuck you take that back
Izuru: Fuyuhiko and Peko are the only ones.
Nagito: Only what, my Hope?
Izuru: Only ones to sense how wicked and evil I am.
Nagito: Pahaha! What?!
Nagito, remembering himself: S-sorry, I mean, yes, evil.
Izuru, suspiciously: ...
Nagito: You must remember that their talents are the most violent.
Izuru: The Coach and the Acrobat...
Nagito: Mmm... that's not quite what I mean. Like recognises like, I suppose! Sparring is one thing, but they have rules. They don't set out to hurt each other. A spectacularly talented mob boss has to be ruthless without limit! Peko is a honed weapon who knows no mercy when it comes to service! Ah, so admirable...
Izuru: ...
Nagito: ...what's wrong? Have I said something offensive as usual?
Izuru, shoving face into his shoulder: I do not wish to be a weapon.
Nagito: Ah... the indomitable Izuru Kamukura can be anything he chooses... have anything he chooses...
Izuru: Maybe I will hold off on the evil for today. I wanted to stroke cats anyway.
Nagito: Whatever you desire, my lord Hope. If you order me to find cats for you I'll gladly endure the claw... ah, you're... my hand...
Izuru, tugging: I will ask the Animal Breeder to supply purrers.
Nagito: But then what do you need to bring me for?
Izuru, blinking: ...
Nagito: Ah... to empty litter boxes, perhaps.
Izuru: ...you will sit and have cats on you and look pretty.
Izuru, nodding to himself: That is the optimal activity for you.
Nagito: Whatever serves my Hope's wishes!
Izuru: Evil wishes.
Nagito: Yes, my lord.
Fuyuhiko: Listen, man, I'm kinda worried. You're datin' that creep and...
Nagito: Our classmate is not a "creep".
Fuyuhiko: Well, Teru--
Nagito: Well, Teruter--
Fuyuhiko: Yeah. Anyway. Look, I gotta ask, even if I got the feelin' you won't tell me. Is Izuru abusin' ya?
Nagito: Oh, yes.
Fuyuhiko: He is???
Nagito: He's truly mean. He won't let me have guns! He takes them all! And he insists on calling me adorable and he set my picture as his background even though I'm hideous! Izuru is the cruellest. :<
Fuyuhiko: I... what? So he confiscates illegal weaponry and... compliments ya? That's it?
Nagito: Isn't that enough?! :'<
Fuyuhiko: I. Wha. He. Huh.
Fuyuhiko: From the look of the guy I was expecting him to hit ya or drag you around on a chain.
Nagito: Gods I wish.
Fuyuhiko: ...You're a hard guy to help, Komaeda.
Nagito: I don't need rescuing from my sweet, beautiful, perfect, unfortunately gentle Izuru.
Izuru: But thank you for checking.
Fuyuhiko: Gaah! When'd you get here?!
Anonymous asked:

servant anon: okay!!

bUT YEAH, i dont think the creators knew what to do with him either bc in the game he wasn't exactly present Present

honestly he's so interesting though, ougjghhg, i honestly think he still has emotions the drugs just really fucked him up bc hajime looked practically catatonic 😔 he's so oughgj

Now its MY turn to talk about niche things I researched for lore! I see Izuru as having an INTENSE case of Alexithymia, he can't really properly process his emotions, he has emotions, they are there, but he cant describe or really conceptualize them, he can't really tell a difference between an emotion vs a physical stimuli. Is he angry or is his body just flushing for no reason? he can't tell. He has a vague ability to grasp interest and curiosity, but few things can really keep that interest and curiosity for long, so he complains about boredom. The symptoms of higher end alexithymia seem to match up pretty well with Izuru I feel. He struggles to even really understand his own emotions when he shows them, like he can't understand why he cries as Chiaki died in DR3

Like just look at these symptoms

  1. difficulty identifying feelings (DIF)
  2. difficulty describing feelings to other people (DDF)
  3. a stimulus-bound, externally oriented thinking style (EOT)
  4. constricted imaginal processes (IMP)

These are all things I associate with Izuru, it just seems to fit him really well, I doubt it was on PURPOSE but yeah Izuru has alexithymia and I can't be told otherwise

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From an alexithymic autistic, yEAH, he's SO ALEXITHYMIC MY GODS.

More than a little squirt of anhedonia in there too (the reduced ability to experience pleasure, so good things feel very numbed while you may still suffer bad emotions on full blast).

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Hiii! 🩵 Sneaky self-promo: I wrote two fics in which Izuru is very alexithymic (and autistic and other stuff): the one about his comfort toy and a sequel from a different character's POV (which contains spoilers for the first but it does let you see Izuru's symptoms from an outside view. Not necessarily a more objective view... just a different one).