seriously, if any of my jokes or ideas or AUs inspire you, please please please feel free to do what you will with them as long as
a) you give me a credit for the original idea
and most importantly
b) you shoot me a link so I can see what you’ve made!
Reblog to let your followers know that despite your current obsession your previous obsessions still exist and are simply lying dormant until they awaken and strike again
today’s zosancore: the bit from Watchmen chapter III when Dan and Laurie fight off a group of muggers and, as the fight ends, they turn to each other high on adrenaline and nearly kiss before nervously backing away
come to think of it, this is also very erasermiccore, especially if you subscribe to my “they used to be class S and Eraser broke it off for Mic’s career but they’re still pining for each other” theory
today’s zosancore: the bit from Watchmen chapter III when Dan and Laurie fight off a group of muggers and, as the fight ends, they turn to each other high on adrenaline and nearly kiss before nervously backing away
Passed this place in Portland with no sign of human beings inside or any indication of what it means
yeah i went inside and there's like a beam that kills you. i think that's normal for portland?
depends. was it vegan?
Goemon can be so zippy when he tucks in his trailing forefins and his dorsal frill and just fuckign GOES
conversely, he can deploy those fins to come to a screeching halt
and every time he does it I think of the way the main character says “pump th’ brakes” in the cold open of Letterkenny s1e1
Goe: [makes threat displays against his own reflection]
me: what sorta backwards fuckin’ pageantry is that?
Goemon can be so zippy when he tucks in his trailing forefins and his dorsal frill and just fuckign GOES
conversely, he can deploy those fins to come to a screeching halt
and every time he does it I think of the way Darryl says “pump th’ brakes” in the cold open of Letterkenny s1e1
ulquihime reverse!au wherein the weird goth kid that Ichigo’s known since they were in kindergarten together gets kidnapped and held hostage in the realm of the Espada of the death/rebirth cycle, whose intimate connection with samsara and the impermanence of all of human works has made her a nihilistic madwoman
couple notes about this au:
*Ulquiorra has always kind of hung out at the edges of Ichigo’s friend group, quietly staring. he has an almost Batman-like reputation for just fucking…..showing up whenever he wants to and leaving just as abruptly whenever he’s feeling peopled out. most people find him extremely off -putting even before he starts with the deeply morbid existentialism (think the Beta Ray Bill quote “If there is nothing but what we make in this world, brothers, let us make good,” but with more vivid descriptions of how corpse-y both he and whoever is listening to him are going to be someday). he and Ishida do NOT get along, as he sees Ishida as muscling in on his turf (“no, Ishida is well-dressed and popular with girls,” says Tatsuki, harshly but accurately). he feels a little desperate about it because Ichigo— and Tatsuki by extension— are pretty much all he has. (nobody discusses Ulquiorra’s family situation, nor why his abrupt appearances at the Kurosaki household so often seen to happen around dinnertime, nor how quickly or mechanically he eats the extra portion that they just happen to have.)
*Orihime’s hollow hole is located in her head, at the site of the hair decoration her brother gave her. (of course, she was alive hundreds of years ago, so it looked quite different than it does in canon, but it still went into her hair there.) the remains of her mask are also there, branching out around it like the petals of a flower. her “4” tattoo is on her left hip. her zanpakuto is a machete and her resurrección animal theme is an axolotl. she can still “reject,” but in order to heal or regenerate anything but herself, an equal amount of matter must rot, corrode, crumble to dust, or otherwise age to death/destruction. (her regeneration is automatic.) she has no fracción—or, to be more precise, she no longer has one. *Ulquiorra still calls her “woman” in this AU, but he does it as a reference to Persephone —specifically, the cthonic Persephone, called Kore (the Maiden) and Despoina (the Mistress), in whose unspoken name men were sacrificed.
here’s some more:
here’s some more:
ulquihime reverse!au wherein the weird goth kid that Ichigo’s known since they were in kindergarten together gets kidnapped and held hostage in the realm of the Espada of the death/rebirth cycle, whose intimate connection with samsara and the impermanence of all of human works has made her a nihilistic madwoman
couple notes about this au:
*Ulquiorra has always kind of hung out at the edges of Ichigo’s friend group, quietly staring. he has an almost Batman-like reputation for just fucking…..showing up whenever he wants to and leaving just as abruptly whenever he’s feeling peopled out. most people find him extremely off -putting even before he starts with the deeply morbid existentialism (think the Beta Ray Bill quote “If there is nothing but what we make in this world, brothers, let us make good,” but with more vivid descriptions of how corpse-y both he and whoever is listening to him are going to be someday). he and Ishida do NOT get along, as he sees Ishida as muscling in on his turf (“no, Ishida is well-dressed and popular with girls,” says Tatsuki, harshly but accurately). he feels a little desperate about it because Ichigo— and Tatsuki by extension— are pretty much all he has. (nobody discusses Ulquiorra’s family situation, nor why his abrupt appearances at the Kurosaki household so often seen to happen around dinnertime, nor how quickly or mechanically he eats the extra portion that they just happen to have.)
*Orihime’s hollow hole is located in her head, at the site of the hair decoration her brother gave her. (of course, she was alive hundreds of years ago, so it looked quite different than it does in canon, but it still went into her hair there.) the remains of her mask are also there, branching out around it like the petals of a flower. her “4” tattoo is on her left hip. her zanpakuto is a machete and her resurrección animal theme is an axolotl. she can still “reject,” but in order to heal or regenerate anything but herself, an equal amount of matter must rot, corrode, crumble to dust, or otherwise age to death/destruction. (her regeneration is automatic.) she has no fracción—or, to be more precise, she no longer has one. *Ulquiorra still calls her “woman” in this AU, but he does it as a reference to Persephone —specifically, the cthonic Persephone, called Kore (the Maiden) and Despoina (the Mistress), in whose unspoken name men were sacrificed.
here’s some more:
on a much lighter cherik note, I just had an idea for a post-beach divorce undercover-at-the-couple’s-retreat fic wherein the X-Men initially contact the Brotherhood to ask Raven to go undercover at the retreat with Charles to use it as a staging point to investigate the vanishing of three nearby mutants
but then Erik shows up with both Raven and Emma under the logic that Raven can’t pretend to be her brother’s wife, that’d just be weird and icky, and two telepaths are better than one anyway, so they thought Emma should play Charles’ wife instead, anyway bye—
and then Raven blithely says that doesn’t the resort look nice? and she hasn’t seen her brother in a few years, you know, and the X-Men have the money for it (“Excuse me?” says Charles) and four heads are better than two really—
and thus was created Francis Snow, a distinguished yet beleaguered genetics professor from a small Massachusetts university; his wife/secretary/power behind the throne, Andrea; his sister, aspiring actress Lark Eisenhardt; and Lark’s architect husband, Max.
(“Ironheart?” “….I panicked.”)
of course, the obvious result of this is Charles messily hashing his relationships with Erik and Raven out in group sessions while the moderator tries to direct him back to his supposed actual wife
meanwhile Emma is just sitting there smirking and going “no, darling, go on, you were talking about how much it hurt you when Max suddenly cut off all intimacy…”
like ok tbh Raven starts it in the intro session: “My main problem with Max… he’s so controlling! I know he loves me, that he’s always there for me, and I’m glad, I am—but he treats me like a child. He always has! It’s like, I need him, but I need my independence, too! Even now that I’m pursuing my career there’s always this feeling between us that Max knows what’s best, that he’s just letting me have my fun, and frankly? It makes it hard to be around him.”
and Charles, who is still keeping his promise to stay out of Raven’s mind but who can’t help picking up the authentic pain coming out of those words, thinks that they are actual criticisms of Erik’s behavior and just shoots him one of his “I am so very disappointed in you” looks
and Erik, who knows damn well who those words are actually about, is just internally “are you fucking kidding”
“Lark is far too intelligent and perceptive to be as naïve as she is. She acts as though she can make the world a kind place just by loving it into submission. Frankly, it’s insulting. I love her, but I need a wife who lives in reality,” and he looks over at Charles and raises an eyebrow like the fucking drama queen he is
(this is the point where Emma would be stifling laughter if she didn’t have the poise of a champion)
on a much lighter cherik note, I just had an idea for a post-beach divorce undercover-at-the-couple’s-retreat fic wherein the X-Men initially contact the Brotherhood to ask Raven to go undercover at the retreat with Charles to use it as a staging point to investigate the vanishing of three nearby mutants
but then Erik shows up with both Raven and Emma under the logic that Raven can’t pretend to be her brother’s wife, that’d just be weird and icky, and two telepaths are better than one anyway, so they thought Emma should play Charles’ wife instead, anyway bye—
and then Raven blithely says that doesn’t the resort look nice? and she hasn’t seen her brother in a few years, you know, and the X-Men have the money for it (“Excuse me?” says Charles) and four heads are better than two really—
and thus was created Francis Snow, a distinguished yet beleaguered genetics professor from a small Massachusetts university; his wife/secretary/power behind the throne, Andrea; his sister, aspiring actress Lark Eisenhardt; and Lark’s architect husband, Max.
(“Ironheart?” “….I panicked.”)
of course, the obvious result of this is Charles messily hashing his relationships with Erik and Raven out in group sessions while the moderator tries to direct him back to his supposed actual wife
meanwhile Emma is just sitting there smirking and going “no, darling, go on, you were talking about how much it hurt you when Max suddenly cut off all intimacy…”
on a much lighter cherik note, I just had an idea for a post-beach divorce undercover-at-the-couple’s-retreat fic wherein the X-Men initially contact the Brotherhood to ask Raven to go undercover at the retreat with Charles to use it as a staging point to investigate the vanishing of three nearby mutants
but then Erik shows up with both Raven and Emma under the logic that Raven can’t pretend to be her brother’s wife, that’d just be weird and icky, and two telepaths are better than one anyway, so they thought Emma should play Charles’ wife instead, anyway bye—
and then Raven blithely says that doesn’t the resort look nice? and she hasn’t seen her brother in a few years, you know, and the X-Men have the money for it (“Excuse me?” says Charles) and four heads are better than two really—
and thus was created Francis Snow, a distinguished yet beleaguered genetics professor from a small Massachusetts university; his wife/secretary/power behind the throne, Andrea; his sister, aspiring actress Lark Eisenhardt; and Lark’s architect husband, Max.
(“Ironheart?” “….I panicked.”)
if you hate some type of animal because it “serves no purpose” or “doesn’t have the same emotional/mental capacity as humans/dogs/cats” i need you to set yourself on fire for me ok
there are folks in the replies who watched an episode of tierzoo or read a reddit copypasta or something and think koalas and mola mola are useless and hate them for that and that is awful and shitty. if they were 'useless' those species wouldn't exist. by consuming and being consumed literally every species contributes to the ecosystem. and regardless, why does an animal have to have an apparent "use" for its existence to be valid??? why does an animal living miles and miles away from you deserve your hatred, just because it swims a little slow or eats poisonous leaves?? i find this a very awful mentality to have. please have more empathy for your fellow creature and do better.
someone please find me the sauce of Ian Mckellen saying that there should be a scene of Magneto and Mystique having sex while Mystique takes Charles’ form because that idea is actually golden
not even from a cherik shipping perspective. from a character depiction perspective.
because that? trying to simulate making love to a telepath by getting his second-in-command to take on his physical form? the second in command who adores him precisely because he made her feel free to take her own form? (and I forget if this was suggested after First Class came out, but if it was, he’s asking her to go to bed with him not just as someone else but specifically as her brother?)
that is the perfect distillation of Magneto at his worst. a cruel, thoughtless, selfish, ultimately hollow act that a desperate but charismatic man convinces someone equally desperate into. an act he rationalizes is ultimately better for everyone involved—because deep down inside he believes its sheer sordid ugliness somehow makes it the right thing to do, because “life is unfair” isn’t a truth, it’s a mandate, and he will enforce that mandate because if he doesn’t someone crueler will—but that actually just makes things even worse.
in the end, Magneto—not the person, but the performance, the praxis, the perpetuation of pain—is a simple statement: “Your worst fears are true.”
not just to mutant-hating baselines (mutants are violent. mutants hate you. mutants can look just like humans) although that was the main goal, but to pro-mutant baselines (maybe I’m wrong. maybe they really are dangerous) and mutants (we can never fit in. we will be met only with violence. only through violence can we openly exist) too.
but the thing that really gets me is that it’s also that statement on a personal level to the people he loves most—to his children (I care more about a war i can’t win than I do about you. if you were human I wouldn’t care about you at all), to Mystique (nobody will love you the way you are, even the people who say they do), to Charles (everything you do just makes things worse. anyone you try to be truly intimate with will ultimately reject you on a fundamental level).
and, of course, it’s that statement to himself (things will never get better. you can’t fix what you’ve broken. you can never go home).
someone please find me the sauce of Ian Mckellen saying that there should be a scene of Magneto and Mystique having sex while Mystique takes Charles’ form because that idea is actually golden
not even from a cherik shipping perspective. from a character depiction perspective.
because that? trying to simulate making love to a telepath by getting his second-in-command to take on his physical form? the second in command who adores him precisely because he made her feel free to take her own form? (and I forget if this was suggested after First Class came out, but if it was, he’s asking her to go to bed with him not just as someone else but specifically as her brother?)
that is the perfect distillation of Magneto at his worst. a cruel, thoughtless, selfish, ultimately hollow act that a desperate but charismatic man convinces someone equally desperate into. an act he rationalizes is ultimately better for everyone involved—because deep down inside he believes its sheer sordid ugliness somehow makes it the right thing to do, because “life is unfair” isn’t a truth, it’s a mandate, and he will enforce that mandate because if he doesn’t someone crueler will—but that actually just makes things even worse.
ulquihime reverse!au wherein the weird goth kid that Ichigo’s known since they were in kindergarten together gets kidnapped and held hostage in the realm of the Espada of the death/rebirth cycle, whose intimate connection with samsara and the impermanence of all of human works has made her a nihilistic madwoman
couple notes about this au:
*Ulquiorra has always kind of hung out at the edges of Ichigo’s friend group, quietly staring. he has an almost Batman-like reputation for just fucking…..showing up whenever he wants to and leaving just as abruptly whenever he’s feeling peopled out. most people find him extremely off -putting even before he starts with the deeply morbid existentialism (think the Beta Ray Bill quote “If there is nothing but what we make in this world, brothers, let us make good,” but with more vivid descriptions of how corpse-y both he and whoever is listening to him are going to be someday). he and Ishida do NOT get along, as he sees Ishida as muscling in on his turf (“no, Ishida is well-dressed and popular with girls,” says Tatsuki, harshly but accurately). he feels a little desperate about it because Ichigo— and Tatsuki by extension— are pretty much all he has. (nobody discusses Ulquiorra’s family situation, nor why his abrupt appearances at the Kurosaki household so often seen to happen around dinnertime, nor how quickly or mechanically he eats the extra portion that they just happen to have.)
*Orihime’s hollow hole is located in her head, at the site of the hair decoration her brother gave her. (of course, she was alive hundreds of years ago, so it looked quite different than it does in canon, but it still went into her hair there.) the remains of her mask are also there, branching out around it like the petals of a flower. her “4” tattoo is on her left hip. her zanpakuto is a machete and her resurrección animal theme is an axolotl. she can still “reject,” but in order to heal or regenerate anything but herself, an equal amount of matter must rot, corrode, crumble to dust, or otherwise age to death/destruction. (her regeneration is automatic.) she has no fracción—or, to be more precise, she no longer has one. *Ulquiorra still calls her “woman” in this AU, but he does it as a reference to Persephone —specifically, the cthonic Persephone, called Kore (the Maiden) and Despoina (the Mistress), in whose unspoken name men were sacrificed.
ulquihime reverse!au wherein the weird goth kid that Ichigo’s known since they were in kindergarten together gets kidnapped and held hostage in the realm of the Espada of the death/rebirth cycle, whose intimate connection with samsara and the impermanence of all of human works has made her a nihilistic madwoman
a harry discoelysium/kim kitsuragi thing set to “Bad Idea” from Waitress but for all except the last chorus it’s a duet between Harry’s inner monologue (ie “You”) and Esprit de Corps narrating Kim’s thoughts
+
X-Men '97 1x02 “Mutant Liberation Begins”
Hey, that language that Magneto uses sounds awfully familiar….
[Picture: a comic book panel depicting Jean Grey and Scott Summers, facing each other in profile. They are depicted from mid-shoulder, heavily implied to be naked. Jean is touching Scott gently on the forehead, and a ripple in the air issues from her fingertips.]
Jean: Scott, I’d like to establish a permanent rapport—a psychic bond—between us. Part of me in your head, part of you in mine. I know I’m asking a lot—total sharing, total intimacy, total…trust. I’ll understand if you say no.
Scott: I say, yes.
[Emphasis added. Panel from Uncanny X-Men #133, “Wolverine Alone”, written by Chris Claremont, drawn by John Byrne and Terry Austin]
I know there are only so many ways one can refer to a psionic rapport, but given how iconic the Dark Phoenix saga is…. what I’m saying is They Knew
