what if u had an identical twin that did porn and u like went to the grocery and theyre like “omg i saw u take 3 dicks at once while wearing a turtle costume” and ur like “god dammit gary”
remember that time they played football at a Beyoncé concert
And in the end I think I’ve learned the final lesson from my travels in time; and I’ve even gone one step further than my father did: The truth is I now don’t travel back at all, not even for the day, I just try to live every day as if I’ve deliberately come back to this one day, to enjoy it, as if it was the full final day of my extraordinary, ordinary life. (About Time 2013)
I WASN’T READY
OMG WTF IS THIS jheuflhweuofhweoufgw
YO WHAT THE HELL IS THIS
This is like, really important.
“Why would you watch women’s sports, the players are terrible–”
(X)
No man has ever scored a midfield goal in the World Cup Finals
iamnoman.jpg
When your parents ask you to do chores:
he’s a legitimate model I swear
All a girl really wants in life is someone to fuck her like Bruce Venture fucks 👼🏼
Never in my wildest dreams could I’ve dreamt up this scene.
I love seeing dads portrayed as literally anything else other than a useless dumbass like on commercials. Dads are fucking awesome, get with it america.
When yo man shoot his load with no warning
me: sorry harry there’s no kale left to make ur banana, kale and almond milk smoothie :(
harry:
happycrazymofo creds to me.
