he’s going to bake something amazing

that moment of intimacy with the person who adjusts your seat belt on a roller coaster

barnes & noble and chill

im going to p

ractice my cooking.  i need to be able to cook 10000 eggs in 10 minutes.  that’s 1000 eggs a minute.  that’s 16.666666 eggs a second.  i need to be fast.  so fast you cant even see my arms as they frantically prepare egg after egg.  i hope the world is ready

WHAT THE UFCK

i wont rest until ive complained about everything

my favorite theory about anything ever is that the titanic sank because too many people time traveled to that place to try to stop the titanic from sinking

me as a pilot

me: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I have an announcement to make but first you have to promise not to get mad

college???????? living on my own????????? paying taxes??????

current relationship status: sleeping diagonally across my queen size bed

I want Beyoncé to beat my ass

I want to cry but i have things to do

Waiting for prince charming

LITERALLY ME