Pixie Bitch.

im horny but like… horny for a successful future full of happiness and satisfaction with the person ive become

I choked on my water

“I ATE MY DOG. TASTE WAS GOOD”

I HATE MY GOTHIC HAMSTER

I NEED IN MY COFFEE SOME SUGAR

I CAN MAKE ALL THESE HAND MOTIONS

I DEMAND ALL THE DAMN SHOE

When the person next to you on an airplane doesn’t realize you’re not their therapist. 

as a kid i never understood why they didn’t like him

As an adult I still don’t understand..

psst it’s a brothel and he’s poor 

OH MY GOD WH-  WHAT

OHMYGOD

Cute boys who don’t have any social media are a waste. How am I supposed to keep up with your life and stalk you???????

me every single time (via suspend)

oh daniel..

I feel like Rebel Wilson did whatever the hell she wanted and barely followed the script for this movie.

Dude was ready

He knew this day was coming.