Oh ok. Childhood memory unlocked.

When i was a little kid, i had a "4d puzzle" of new york city.

You built the cardboard jigsaw base, then the foam island, and then you had plastic buildings and bridges.

And it had instructions to place the buildings in chronological order, as well as a timeline, hence "4d".

And i just fucking remembered. In 2001 on the timeline a step was "remove buildings #xx and #xy (World Trade Centers)" with no other explanation.

And as a kid i had no clue what that meant, but looking back on it my puzzle really just told me "alright kid, do a 9/11" and i, age 5, went along with it.

“hit His prostate this” “milk His prostate that”

where are the fucking posts about milking Her prostate.

heres 5 quick tips to Obliterating you favorite girls prostate~ 💖💖💖

10 best ways to destroy her prostate

Some tips from a girl with a prostate: * DESTROY IT. Her girldick/clit/whatever might be soft and sensitive, but her prostate is not. It needs punishment. You have to fuck her hard, and relentlessly. If she wants to get her g-spot pounded until she cums so hard she nearly blacks out, you need to talk and explain that you might have to push her. You might have to make her cry. There is a solid chance this will make her dripping wet. * DESTROY IT softly. Or rather, with a soft tool. The amount of brutal fucking you’re going to do means you run the risk of tearing her, and then she’s out of action for play for 1-6 months. Find a nice, super-soft toy if you’re going to peg her. Bio-dick is also pretty great, texture and firmness wise. Fingers might be too firm and intense for her, so be aware of that, and hard plastic toys are really hard to learn with. * Have a firm understanding of how to reach it. It’s fairly shallow, and to the front. Bottoming out in her is fun as fuck, but remember that it’s not the best way to make her into a drooling, mewling mess. Right past the tightest point of her hole is the sweet spot, and you’re aiming for the back of whatever hardware she has in front. Fuck her from behind, into the mattress. Push her knees up to her ears, if you’re railing her from the front. Have her lean back, and let you watch the whole show, if she’s riding on top of you. Go for the full nelson, instead of reverse cowgirl, if she’s on top and inverse to you. * Fuck her brain the hardest of any part of her. Know her kinks and fantasies, and engage with them. Use words and phrases that will make her quiver, maybe watch her favorite kind of porn together, during. Indulge her, and put her in the most receptive place to have her mind melt into desperate lust. * Foreplay. Like any other girl, if she’s aching for it long before you begin, she’s most likely to cum like a rocket. Get into her head, and stay there all day. * Desperation. Make sure she hasn’t cum for at least a few days, ideally a week. Tease her. Edge her. Make her edge herself. If she’s into it, consider chastity. * Set the scene. She needs to feel safe, comfortable and like she has all the time in the world. You can’t “fit this in” to your schedule, this IS your schedule, if you want to make it happen. Likewise, remove any negative vibes from her mind that you can. If she’s got genital dysphoria, take her junk out of the equation with cute lingerie or chastity. Make her feel unpressured to perform, but also let her know how much you’d enjoy seeing her squirt for you. * Pay attention. You’ll know when you’re getting it right from the pathetic/adorable noises she’ll start making. Do more of that. * Do it often. Even if you don’t get her to cum from prostate/g-spot stimulation alone the first time, or the tenth, it’s a process. She needs to learn how to lean into it, how to “let it happen”. She needs to be able to practice, so she can learn to cum for you the way you both want. * Have fun.

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Sure this is horny or whatever but why is this information kept from beginning folks? Like, this post is so very appreciated ‘cause you’ve just up and demystified the whole shebang

definitely agree

real leftists believe in demystifying and destigmatising sex

God the saddest thing about all the unmasking stuff is that people are probably secretly (and some openly) happy to not see any of us cripples in public now. Lots of us have to stay at home bc we can't risk getting covid (again). And the ones that go out get harassed for wearing a mask. Like I've had people come up to me and ask why I'm wearing that or say loudly that they don't think masks work. It's scary.

And even probably people at pride think this too. That they are happy not to have any cripples in wheelchairs or canes/crutches slowing them down or getting grossed out by people with feeding tubes, diapers, or colostomy bags. We "ruin the fun" by just existing apparently.

If you are abled and read this, check your biases. You probably feel this way too deep down. Wear your mask.

Are fedoras really that bad?

YES YES THEY ARE

voidethered:

wait, does that mean?

oh boy…….

Luckily, this nonsense doesn’t work on girls.

Observe…

IT’S GOTTEN BETTER!

This post is immaculate

It can’t be true.

And it can’t possibly work on motorcycle helmets.

I must test it.

Nothing happening so far…

HOLY SHIT IT WORKS

What in the world?

Oh why not? This should be interesting.

Here we go!

Were all mad here in Underland!

What the hell! Never Again!

… Actually …

One more time.

Alright, I gotta try this!

Can’t be that bad!

….

…oh my god…

ask-gmodsfmrocks:

This just gets better and better

This is one of my favourite things to look at

holy shit this stuff is back

The Gravity Falls one though

i wonder if it works for flower crowns?

here goes nothin-

w HAT THE

DID I JUST-

WHAT THE FUCK

Okay Clearly something is up.

Hmm… I wonder

I’m sure nothing could possibly…

HOLY SHIT

IT GOT BETTER

I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING SO LONG FOR THIS POST OH MY GOD!!!

I wonder what happens when you wear 8 of these at once…

Never not reblog

IT’S ON MY DASH. ACTUALLY ON MY DASH.

Oh my God, there are so many new ones

It’s like looking at an influential piece from an art period…

It’s like looking at

an influential piece from

an art period…

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

I got several requests for more of these!

Flags: Baker's original rainbow, queer, asexual, aromantic, bear brotherhood, questioning, transmasculine, agender, genderfluid, and omnisexual.

(Image description: ten square pride flags with white text that reads "you'll never have the comfort of our silence again".)

These are inspired by this post, an image of a sign taken at an anti-Anita Bryant protest in 1978.

inside you, young transmasculine person, is a voice that will tell you not to like certain things because they're For Girls. that is the voice of the devil, and you must never listen to it.

i do im celebrating my dogs birthday

shes turning 2

I’m also celebrating your dogs birthday

celebrating tumblr user heartseeker’s dog’s birthday on the fourth everyone

Reblog if I can go on your page and write stupid things in your ask box whenever I'd like to.

Starving to death this morning because ive been to the new local cafe twice this week already and if i go a third time ill look desperate.

Me: I like the goods and/or services you offer in exchange for my money

The cafe, in my head: lmao cringe, kill yrself buddy

The endlessly wailing siren of my social anxiety issues is probably not going to be silenced by the people in the comments pointing out that being a regular at a restaurant is a normal thing for people to be, but I do zero-sarcasm appreciate the attempt, is very kind!

I used to walk into [redacted nonpizza store] in my area and the guy behind the counter would immediately ask me if I wanted a pizza. truly I experienced the mortifying ordeal of being known as the pizza guy

compared to that being a regular at a normal cafe ordering normal breakfast items would be a real relief

Literally dread this scenario, to have your identity *reduced down* to a single item order, to be known as such a plebian with such a restricted palette that your order can be charted in advance, oh widdle ash wants his chicken tendies uwu.

I agree having a set breakfast order is more socially acceptable than a set pizza order. But its not enough; its never enough.

Though life update: i did just go to the cafe in the end. I compromised with my anxiety by ordering a sandwich instead of my typical bagel. It was fine but not as good.

on the flipside, we went to the same place for brunch a couple years, one time my buddy orders something new, and while he’s eating five different members of the wait staff stopped by to be like “did they bring you the wrong thing?”

This thread needs a trigger warning keep the horror stories coming

There was a bakeshop near my house that made soft ginger cookies and and macarons but only 2-3 good flavors. I walked in once and the cashier (who I definitely didn’t recognize) said “let me guess - ginger cookies and cookies-n-cream macarons, right?”

Needless to say, I never returned.

I once went to a McDonald’s, the cashier said “big mac combo meal and a chicken burger, right?” and I said “yeah” and then didn’t come back for two years

This entire genre of concern so fascinatingly foreign to me! the cafeteria pizza guy knows I want 3 slices of whatever veggie pizza he has, and he will have them ready for me without me having to say anything besides a quick murmured thanks, and he smiles when he sees me and starts to grab them, and it feels so good! to be known, even a little bit, to be a small constant in someone else’s life… there’s just something so beautiful and precious and good in that, for me.

When I lived in [the city where I lived for undergrad] there was this place very close to my house with cheap and delicious lamb curry and the people at the counter knew my face and would start scooping the lamb curry into a bowl when they saw me come through the door. I thought this was lovely of them and always made sure to tip generously. Restaurant and regular is a mutually beneficial relationship.

Yeah there’s a bakery/cafe a few doors down from me and reaching the point where they a) remember my face/name and b) know my regular order meant that I can no longer get breakfast anywhere else ever.

Had the guy at the taco truck I routinely went to for lunch who asked me after a few years if I only ate burritos or something, no man I’m just don’t see the need to mix up my lunches.

As someone who’s been both front and back of house in various large and small food services: regulars account for roughly 40% of sales and thier consistency makes it easier to order supplies and keep stock levels stable.

As front of house my regulars were always a welcome sight, an easy serve and clear, a guaranteed a happy customer and pleasant interaction. Especially in diners or lunch spots where reliable turnover = tips and most people never come in more than once, having a familiar face who’s rhythms and tastes you recall makes the rest of your service work easier.

If you have any anxiety about being a regular somewhere just be sure to tip well, and you will magically transform from ‘pizza guy’ or ‘lamb curry dude’ to Beloved Favorite Regular and the servers will squabble to get you seated in thier section.

When I worked for Domino’s Pizza, there was a guy who ordered a pizza, without fail, on Thursday at 6pm. Until the day he didn’t.

One of our drivers was delivering nearby and decided to check on the guy. Turns out the guy got home, got most of the way through the door, and lost consciousness. (If memory serves, it was a diabetic episode.) Driver couldn’t revive him and called 911. Saved the guy’s life.

when i worked in a remote office when i started my job, i went to denny’s for lunch enough that i’d just walk in and a server would go “take a seat over there, I’ll be over with your iced tea to take your order in a moment”

Food service workers love their regulars, especially if you’re a good tipper and are polite, we literally look forward to seeing you every day. Also service workers don’t care if you order the same thing, and us remembering your order means we like you.

^^^^

Also no we aren’t “boiling your personality down to an item/order”, you are. We are offering you preference recall and welcoming you and your *presence* does in fact correspond to our need to give you a certain order. It’s okay for that to happen.

For all my fellow social anxiety sufferers out there. Because my local coffee shop knows I always get iced coffee or a mocha and a biscotti and it stresses me the fuck out because I’m like “What if they think my order is dumb?? What if they’re like there she goes again stuffing her face with biscottis all the time” but nothing matters and a biscotti with your coffee in the morning really makes all the difference in what kinda day you’re gonna have.

I have pretty severe social anxiety, but there was a Chinese restaurant in [town I lived in for a few years] that made some of the very best egg drop soup, vegetable lo mein, and spring rolls. I ordered that every time I went there. They would seat me by a window in a quiet spot because they saw me put earplugs on when things got noisy.

Then I moved to a different but nearby town. I’m unable to drive (due to medical reasons) and public transportation didn’t go near the town. It was a year later, when I had a study group, that I was able to go there again. We had been taking turns for what restaurant we would eat and study at. We’d be there for hours, ordering several meals, and tip heavy, around 50%. Anyone one of us who couldn’t afford to eat or tip would be covered by the rest because several of my classmates were from wealthy families. They covered me more than once in exchange for drawings.

When it was my turn, we went to the Chinese restaurant. I walked in and they immediately knew who I was and what I favored. It was pretty dead in there, so we mostly had the place to ourselves. It ended up being a six course meal and five hours of studying and discussing the project. They brought me my favs as soon as they saw my plate or bowl was empty. The bill ended up at a little over $1k.

A couple months later, a friend took me there where we had a nice lunch after I finished my last exam. The owner approached our table and told me each of the students I had brought last time were now regulars. Some brought more people, and business was booming. They gave me a little card that said I would receive free meals for the next two years, as thanks for being a regular bringing in so many new people.

Before I moved across the country, I wanted to visit the place for a final meal before leaving. The place was closed with a sign that said “moved to new location.” The new location was near the university. So we went there, and the owner informed me that because so many of their new regulars were uni students, they moved. The place was easily 3x the size of their original. They told me it was always packed during meal times, and they now opened for breakfast with tradition Chinese breakfast foods. Business was booming, and all because of their regulars.

Being a regular is one of the very best compliments you can offer a restaurant, diner, meal trucks, etc. They love seeing you, especially if you tip well. I will likely never eat there again due to living more than 2500 miles away, but it feels good that my love for egg drop soup, vegetable lo mein, and spring rolls helped out a wonderful restaurant.

Be a regular. They love you.

we are creatures of pattern and routine and community and affection. life is good when it is a calm, peaceful, pleasant routine with happy, friendly faces

Congratulations to The Register for what might be my favorite coverage of the indictment.

Wait, the closing paragraphs are pretty strong, too.

reblog if you:

- are aromantic and want to kill

- think aromantic people should be allowed to kill

- think fish are pretty cool

You can only reblog this today or until the next Monday, June 19th, 2034.

The solution to homelessness is housing.

Housing, not policing and harassment!

Happy Juneteenth Tumblr✊🏿✊🏾✊🏽✊🏼

48hr tumblr blackout proposal

tumblr mobile has seadily become near unusable these past few updates. not just from a user experience perspective (which is important enough in itself) but also from an accessibility perspective.

examples include the new way the image viewer works (if you can call it "working"), the tumblr live button replacing the profile button, and that newly created blogs will be forced to have their main dashboard tab be the 'for you' page.

the demands of the protest would be along the lines of:

to protest against these usability issues, and inspired by the recent reddit blackout, i propose a 48 hour blackout (where you don't use tumblr at all). preferably of both mobile and web (since web has problems too) but mobile is the focus here.

I suggest the 48 hours between the 30th of June to the end of the 1st of July.

this marks the end of pride month (for the "queerest place on the internet") and the start of disability month (since accessibility is a massive issue here).

tumblr office is in San Francisco, USA, so the times and dates will be calculated using their time zone (PDT).

you can find out the times and dates for your timezone here.

i can't afford to blaze this post so please spread it around as much as possible! protests only work if significant numbers show up!

tumblr rejected the blaze campaigns for this post because they know it would hurt them. let's make this an indefinite blackout - it's the best way to get results.

(so the blackout would be from June 30th onwards)

@one-time-i-dreamt @i-am-a-fish @lizluvscupcakes tagging some larger blogs to hopefully get the word out more

Super fucked up! wtf is wrong with these people?  #IamWithMili!

What is every little girl supposed to have long hair in a ponytail? So happy to see all of the support going her way.

Everybody remembers that we absolutely knew this would happen, right?

Like, trans people predicted this from the start. Everyone was SO SURE they could identify us on sight, and we said “If you run with that assumption you’re going face-first into a goddamn wall” and here we go.

It’s like people forget women with short hair exist.

In the six years that this has happened, Milli has continued to play soccer, is on track for joining a national team, and still keeps her hair short.

Read this and take it in.

Even if you have your papers.

Even if you are fortunate to have your gender match your sex.

Even if you were assigned feminine at birth.

They can still tell you to your face you’re not a woman if you don’t conform to a patriarchal standard of skinny Anglo with long hair.

They can just deny you for no reason at all.

THIS MAKES ALL THOSE SPORTS BANS LAWS USELESS AT PROTECTING CIS GIRLS! The very thing tbey were supposed to do!

Let’s get one thing right.

Sports bans, bathroom bans, ANY type of ban on trans people in public places were NEVER meant to protect cis girls or women or women’s sports or any of that crap.

They’re about control and forcing ALL people to conform to stereotypical gender norms and eradicating trans people in the process.

It’s (christo)fascism and genocide.

Very Brief Guide to [tumblr], for Reddit refugees

Shit You Must Do Right Fucking Now:

Basic Features of the Site:

Stuff Tumblr Does That Other Sites Don't:

General Etiquette:

Tips:

Have fun on [tumblr], everyone!

Do you ever eat popcorn out of the palm of your own hand with such ardent desperation that you feel like both a wild horse and the gentle schoolgirl feeding it treats to gain its affection 

Hey there guys. It’s me, in 2022, commenting on this post from 2016. There’s been a lot of people on this site lately being like “oooh no don’t make viral uwu I’m so pathetic, little, and defenseless and my poor notifications can’t handle 10k reblogs” well first of all ALL of us are pathetic, little, and defenseless and secondly none of our notifications can handle 10k reblogs and thirdly I’m not a coward and I think this should have a million notes. Not because of its own merit as a post, I just think it’d be funny if when I turn 30 this year and I reflect on the greatest accomplishments of my life thus far, I have to at least consider putting “famous tumblr popcorn post” on the list

Hey there guys. It’s me, in 2023, in May specifically, I’m 30 and for the record it rules, I had a lil aging crisis and now I’m past that and I’m just like goddamn it is great being in my thirties and I had a wonderful birthday NO THANKS TO YOU GUYS

actually, much thanks to you guys. Some of you were inspiringly crazy about this post. Frankly you worked harder for this than I did, and your efforts were touching and inspiring and funny and yet we STILL FAILED. GUYS WE GOTTA PUT OUR EYES BACK ON THE BALL. We have ehhh about six months before I turn the big three-one, which is actually the most important birthday because now you’re in your thirties For Real, and I personally can’t think of a better way to ring in my 31st year of life than by trying and failing to do something that I was hoping to knock out in my twenties.

Good luck, kiddo

Are you satisfied, op? When will it be enough?

I feel I couldn’t have been clearer about the number at which this will be enough

funds for indigenous communities affected by the canada wildefires

i’ll update this as i find more fundraising initiatives and please free to share your own. reblogs with anything than sharing resources/mutual aid requests/fundraising opportunities get blocked. 

reposting since I never migrated this to my art blog (this one)