probably watching Marvel

*sees a take* oh wow that is objectively bad

*sees my mutual agrees with that take* actually it’s uhhh it’s a complex issue. there’s room for— there’s nuance

Paul justifying anything John says

this person is talking about the fucking beatles on an already kind of shitty tumblr post. where am i.

I THOUGHT THIS WAS TALKING ABOUT THE BIBLE

they're texting each other

Literally nothing will ever be as satisfying as the 4 minute long fight sequence in Kingsman: The Secret Service, in which Colin Firth mercilessly wastes an entire Westboro Basptist Church like congregation as the guitar solo from Lynard Skynard’s 1973 anthem Freebird plays in the background.

This was the best career move Colin Firth ever made

Also had the best line/delivery of any movie ever

Baby bear catching snowflakes

"Korbut Flip" by Olga Korbut in Munich 1972 Olympics.

DAMN 😱

he put it into words

Collateral damage

the night we met but it took him 12 years to bleed out

If she’s hotter than you, then you’re cooler than her. Fact.

TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN!!!

Tomorrow is March 28th

MY TA SHOT SOMEONE IN THE FOOT AND THE PROFESSOR WAS SO FUCKING QUICK LMAOOO

some context 

1. my TA, Ralph, shot his girlfriend’s abusive ex in the foot

2. abusive ex was also a sex offender

3. he shot him when ex came buy to pick some stuff up from girlfriend and tried to take some of Ralph’s items as well

4. ex is stable and alive in a hospital

5. i didn’t do assignment 8 so i am very happy

some more Facts About Ralph

he is whiter then snow. this man is pure 100% american redneck in everything but the politics. this is intimidating if you dont know him because he owns like 3 different guns but also has animated discussions about “how his sister should be able to get married” when you bring up lgbt rights. his sister isnt even gay or trans or anything, he just thinks that LGBT rights also means that the lady should propose when she wants to. hes a little confused but he got the spirit. upon finding out that i am queer he said, word for word “THATS FUCKING RADICAL HOMIE” 

in the first week of school he snorted a line of pepper in the cafeteria and threw up.

the only other crime hes committed before was accidently dropping a weight from his balcony and cracking the sidewalk. which is technically destruction of public property but the judge basically laughed at him and have him 10 hours of community service

this man once walked me home when i stayed late at the lab and talked to me animatedly about breeding brine shrimp for different lab purposes. absolutely captivated by this discussion. i trust him with my life

oh mg god this post somehow got better

squoosh

When someone tickles my neck

theyre so rude and in their mind theyre so nice for even talking to you at all

this gave me PHYSICAL PAIN

i didn’t realize that i repressed that memory but i absolutely did and it happened almost exactly like that

I only made it halfway through.

She creates more content like this on tiktok and they're hilarious but it's also so painful to watch. I even lowkey started to hate seeing her because of how accurate it is. But then I saw this comment in one of her videos and it really made me think

you mean to tell me i suffered through 2020 and no one thought to show me this???

this is like scrooge seeing his own grave in a christmas carol

Love reblogging a picture of Tumblr’s grave on Tumblr