having fun pretending I belong

i enjoy the simple things in life like sleeping, daydreaming, ignoring reality, listening to music, being delusional, recklessly spending my cash, being a disappointment to my family and eating fruits

Ive had this saved in my phone since April

no, I will not do my stupid human tasks, I will stare at the ceiling and yearn for something I'll never feel

good fucking lord i would just like to spend so long walking around a museum that my feet hurt by the end of the day. maybe pop into the gift shop. grab a latte on the way home. jesus christ

“some things aren’t meant to last” ok but consider this: I love permanence and consistency

I dont think the joker chemicals really did all that when he fell in. I think he just wanted an excuse to be like that

Joker: the joker chemicals made me crazy

Arkham doctor: that was a mild detergent

Joker: heehee hoo ha ho hee hoo

was just Remembering how you’d be out with a friend and you’d each order a different cocktail and you’d ask “what’d you get?” and they’d read the description off the menu and you’d be like “ooh that sounds good” and then they’d say “try it!” and then you’d have a lil sip of their drink and they’d have a lil sip of your drink and you’d decide which one was best and you wouldn’t give each other a life-threatening respiratory infection

god said let's give this bitch so much self awareness it's going to stop her from doing literally anything

@funneylizzie

Villains in Addams Family movies go to really unnecessary lengths to defraud them of the family fortune. These people just give it away on whims all the time. If I just walked into the house and started wearing their clothes and spending their money, they wold start introducing me as Cousin Intruder and forget there was ever a time I didn’t live with them.

Gomez in particular would enjoy your boldness, Cousin Intruder.

Oh shit.

The Addams family loves and greets every person entering one of their homes.

The Addams family adopted or married every person wishing to stay.

This is why the Addams family is full of freaks.

Of course.

So what we’re saying is, tracing the Addams’ geneology is damn near impossible and it’s just as likely that no living member of the family is actually a blood relative of the people who originally held the family name?

This is actually, probably canon.  There’s a joke in the Broadway musical about Grandmama.    In some versions of the canon she’s Morticia’s mother, in others she’s Gomez’s mother.   So the Broadway play has Gomez say “My mother?  I thought she was YOUR mother?” and then they never bring it up again, she’s still Grandmama. 

one thing me n my art loving gf would do is visit galleries and play a game called “root, loot or boot” 

the gist is that you would look at a group of paintings in a room and decide which figure in the painting you’d root (fuck, in Australian slang), which painting you’d loot (steal and put on your wall at home) and which painting you’d boot (punt into the garbage because it’s shit and Not Art)

a couple of things about my experiences:

1. this game is a lot more fun if you’re attracted to women because there’s so many Hot Gals to choose from 

2. if you are attracted to men, you will spend a lot of time going “well, looks like I’ll have to pick jesus again” as my bi gf did

3. it gets more complicated in modern art museums and you find yourself having saying, “I’d fuck the rhombus” “you CAN’T fuck the rhombus” “then I’ll fuck that blue squiggle thing. what’s it called?” “creeping existential dread in blue” “then does that mean I’m fucking the squiggle or am I getting fucked by the existential dread it represents?” “aren’t we all already getting fucked by existential dread?”

4. if you play this with an art history nerd, they may decide to kill you over one of your “boot” choices

5. you will get Disapproving Looks from other patrons who overhear your heated debates

6. it’s also the best fun you’ll ever have in an art gallery

life hack: do ur readings and go to class

who needs swag when you have class

…ical music

I THINK I LOST A FOLLOWER FOR THIS

THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE AGAINST CLASSICAL MUSIC I’LL RAM MY TROMBONE SO FAR UP YOUR HOOHAH WHEN SOMEONE EATS YOU OUT THEY’LL BE ABLE TO PLAY THE SOLO FROM SIBELIUS’S SYMPHONY IN C

this bearded dragon enjoys dressing as a real dragon.

me revisiting my scene phase playlist

me having a depressive episode

me fucking it up bc I got moves and bitches love me

me: *swipes away any new notifications on my phone like a cat slapping away anything getting in their face they don’t like*

I could watch this forever!

A live action Lilo & Stich could be lit, depending on what a live action Stich and all the other creations would look like.

I love!!!!

good god when the onions and garlic hit the olive oil..........

What’s funny is that this actually happened. 

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis. 

Did he survive?

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

His name was Aimo Koivunen if you want to look him up

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed