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A medium pizza

@squeezed-duck-neck

24, nb, entj, gayer than my parents ever dreamed AVL, NC
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squeezed-duck-neck

Having to spend every day, every moment looking at someone, thinking about someone who doesn’t love you like you love them is the worst kind of emotional strain. The feeling of potential accompanied by the distinct taste of loss is unmatched. Seeing their posts, their face, reading their throwaway thoughts on their story just takes on a whole new kind of bittersweet flavor when you realize just how close you got and still couldn’t have them. And they’ll never love you back. And god it was so close to something beautiful–but they’re afraid and you’re not stable, and the list goes on even when your heart has already fallen most of the way. It just sits on your chest, pulls tight in your jaw and behind your eyes and just slowly burns its way out.

Because they will never love you.

squeezed-duck-neck
biggest-goldiest-fish
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dippersballoon

I saw an opportunity and I took it

This is what they mean when they say life flashes before your eyes as you die

For those wondering, the song is ”Mr. Blue Sky” by ELO.

Perhaps someone beat me to it, but here are ALL of the featured vines, in order of appearance:

  1. I won’t hesitate bitch
  2. Hi my name is Tre and I have a basketball game tomorrow
  3. Whaddup, I’m Jared I’m 19 and I never fucking learned how 2 read
  4. Kermit the Frog jumps off building
  5. Fr e sh a voca do
  6. back at it again at Krispy Kreme
  7. There is only one thing worse than a rapist
  8. Club Jam (yes a really good book)
  9. At least the taco was free
  10. I am the Sand Guardian, guardian of the sand
  11. Grandma loves ping pong too much
  12. If your name is Junior
  13. Welcome to Target
  14. I’m just cooking pizza
  15. Cole Sprouse dress-up game
  16. On all levels except physical, I am a Wolf
  17. Kid hits ceiling of gym with rope (breaking free)
  18. Kid smacked by fly swatter
  19. Fuck it up Kenneth (my boy going to school)
  20. Um I’m not finished (Tyler the Creator)
  21. WE’RE BREAKING FREE
  22. SAIL
  23. I’m Squidward
  24. So I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my tiddies
  25. So no head? (breaking skateboard)
  26. Actually, Megan (I can’t sit anywhere)
  27. No off topic questions (Chris Christie)
  28. What the fuck, Richard
  29. Drop it like it’s hot (its just luke)
  30. Bored as shiiiiii
  31. Liberian accent (plasma globe)
  32. New haircut (Parker Kit Hill)
  33. Summertime sadness (chicken)
  34. More like hurricane TORTILLA
  35. I got an a-bor-tion
  36. All Around the World (TheJasminator)
  37. When there’s a cutie next to you at a red light
  38. Snake licks lollipop
  39. Accept yourself, love yourself
  40. Be whatever you wanna be
  41. Don’t touch Zac’s music (LENARR)
  42. Whoever threw that paper, your mom’s a ho
  43. Can I please get a waffle?
  44. Turn off the flash you fucking moron (Star Wars)
  45. Ebony Jenkins (shut up!)
  46. Kevin, watch the light dude
  47. Horse meditation
  48. A girl a dream & a clothing hanger
  49. Is that a weed? (911 microwave)
  50. Helium balloons (floating car)
  51. Fireplace fairy
  52. I’m your freestyle dance teacher
  53. I can’t believe you’ve done this
  54. Which way the Quiznos is
  55. Impossible paper toss shot
  56. Hemtube (dancing with cat)
  57. I nurture my skin (Shaq)
  58. Why are you running
  59. Happy birthday?
  60. Thicker than a bowl of oatmeal (courtroom)
  61. Farkle falling
  62. Fuck you (soda machine)
  63. Squash banana (the branch I was holding broke)
  64. Take On Me
  65. And now my sock is wet (water gun)
  66. All I ever wanted was some motherfuckin guala
  67. When there’s too much drama at school
  68. Two bros chillin in the Hot Tub
  69. What’s your name? (ouija board)
  70. Chillary Clinton (chillin in Cedar Rapids)
  71. Guy drops slurpee (7-Eleven)
  72. Girl scared of convertible car
  73. Guy who is self-conscious about his lisp (Rice Krispies Treats)
  74. Would you like the spider on your hand?
  75. Shopping cart crash
  76. We actually have the chip reader now
  77. I’M A GIRAFFE
  78. Dinner with Zayn Malik (Chihuahua eating spaghetti)

I HOPE IT’S HELPFUL TO SOMEONE! Peace ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

this gave me such a warm feeling i legit teared up no joke

BEAUTY

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dinogaby

Reblogging for research purposes

Reblogging because my brain rapid fire quoted all of them

squeezed-duck-neck

Me: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the gayest of the all?

Mirror: idk man wtf go find out yourself no like seriously go find other gays you need friends

squeezed-duck-neck

How to tell you’re old

You try on a shoe and say, “Ooooh, arch support!”

squeezed-duck-neck

Idk

I don’t know if I’m a top, bottom, or switch, but I’ll figure it out eventually with someone I love enough to show every part of me-top, bottom, and everything else.

squeezed-duck-neck
djungelskogjamjam
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catchymemes
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quiet--batpeople

fuck..

What..the..fuck, Google???

I’m surprised that this post doesn’t contain a link to turn off all of these settings (maybe another version of this post does, who knows)

Go to https://myaccount.google.com/activitycontrols and this will take you to a page which states what information Google is currently tracking. Each section has a blue slider next to it. Click it and it will come up with a confirmation box, scroll through it and select “pause” and you should be good to go.

Important info about the sliders to pause the tracking: they only pause it! You have to click on manage activity and keep clicking on stuff until you get a thing cominging up asking if you’re sure you want to delete all of that shit, and then you click yes.

If you only click pause, google will still have your shit! You need to manually delete everything if that’s what you’re trying to do or else it won’t work.

squeezed-duck-neck

No disrespect to anyone, but I’m lowkey mad that I looked cute af at pride yesterday and today and I didn’t even get a date.

squeezed-duck-neck

Oh my god I just want to be absolutely all over a girl who’s breathing heavily because I absolutely tore her clothes off her

But also I want to slow dance for hours to 50’s music with that same girl

squeezed-duck-neck

Seriously?

So I really like this girl but she’s giving my whiplash-inducing mixed messages so idk what to do except be my normal (charming on purpose, wanting to kiss her constantly but hardcore controlling it, and totally into her on every level) self. What’s a girl to do?

squeezed-duck-neck

There are random loose chickens on the farm where I work and they usually crap on the porch (which I hate) so I chase them away by 1. spraying them with the hose or 2. yelling “WOT R U DOIN IN MAH SWAMP?!” Works every time.

squeezed-duck-neck

Imagine how odd it would be if someone asked about your job and you to had to tell them you’re the CEO of Pringles.