I got somethins to say

i already fED you

IRRELEVANT

#ultimate ally mom: forgot child was trans and gave wrong sex talk (tags from @findafight)

guy who gets so mad about losing a video game that instead of punching his wall he goes and gets his electric hole saw and it's not battery powered so has to run an extension cord and it's a whole thing

*loses game* fuCK *put on appropriate footwear, long pants, and eye protection, and ties back hair and tucks or removes any hanging clothing or jewelry that could potentially get caught in a moving part* FUCK THIS *walks to garage and takes reciprocating saw out of its case, where it is being safely kept away from water and other things that may damage the saw* MOTHERF- *reads user manual because it’s been a while since operating the saw, also replaces the dull blade with a sharp blade for safety and efficiency* I CARRIED THE WHOLE FUCKIN TEAM *inspects extension cord for any damage, then plugs into a grounded outlet and tapes down anywhere the cord could potentially be a tripping hazard* FUCKIN SHIT *uses stud finder to make sure the area is clear and cuts a lovely little fist sized hole next the computer* oh mY GOD

I just discovered foodtimeline.org, which is exactly what it sounds like: centuries worth of information about FOOD.  If you are writing something historical and you want a starting point for figuring out what people should be eating, this might be a good place?

CHRISTMAS CAME EARLY

this is awesome but the original link just turned into a redirect loop for me, here it is again (x)

OH HELLO

No more potatoes in medieval novels!

best thing about uncle iroh is that if you pay attention he is actually just as much of an idiot as zuko but has just mastered the art of coming across as a wise old man. the even better thing is that zuko is the only one on the planet who somewhat realizes this and no one would ever believe him because he's zuko

like uncle iroh 100% does dumb shit on purpose sometimes to get people to underestimate him and keep zuko from capturing the avatar, but other times he just, and i cannot emphasize this enough, does impulsive dumb shit for no reason other than the fact that terminal stupid presumably runs in the royal family's blood

uncle: "you never think things through, prince zuko!"

also uncle:

Kids are funny.

I just had a random memory of a friends’ kid when she was about six or seven, when she cornered a couple of us at a get-together and says “wanna know what my dad had for lunch?”

We figured this was, while unusual, a pretty straight-forward conversation starter. “Sure”, we said.

We were NOT prepared. She went on this EPIC storytelling monologue about the restaurant and Italy and the art on the walls and some dramatic story she made up ABOUT the art on the walls. We were enraptured. No idea what was going on but by god we were hooked. At no point does she mention food.

The next week, similar get-together with the same people. Same friend I’m talking to. Same child walks up. “Wanna know what my dad had for lunch?”

But NOW we’re prepared, we’re excited. We’re about to hear some SHIT. We grin in anticipation. “Sure!”

“A salad.”

She walks off, seemingly unaware she just set up the funniest fucking week-long joke my friend and I had ever heard

imagine a world with no doubles. all the people kinning in peace. john lennon said that

And I’d say he knows a LITTLE more about kinning than you do, pal, because he INVENTED IT.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Then he used his record money to buy TWO of every album on EARTH! And then herded them into a concert, and then he BEAT THE CRAP OUT OF EVERY SINGLE RECORD!

And from that day forward any time a bunch of attendees are together in one place it’s called a live performance!

…

It keeps getting better

tf2 what the living fuck post

i’ve never seen this version of this post.

When there's a tv episode full of emotional and physical whump

YOU hates terfs

rb if u hates terfs

Is that the unfair sports advantage they’re always talking about?

You are a supervillain who has just captured your rival’s child. Rather than being afraid, they’re begging you to let them stay.

Frankly, you’d known those idiots had had a kid for years now. You’d pretended not to, because while you’d committed a lot of atrocities in your life, you weren’t willing to face the moral quandary of whether you would knowingly kill a child just to spite its parents.

They probably thought they were being clever though, what with the blaming you for an injury you knew damn well you’d never given keeping one of them out of commission for a few months, then references to what they would ‘leave behind’ or ‘could not follow’ when in the latest death trap. One of them had accidentally pulled a pacifier out of their utility belt once, and tried to pass it off as being prepared for any young children they came across while rescuing.

Idiots.

Still, you had standards. Standards that fell somewhere past war crimes and before common decency, but they were standards.

A comic to try and sort through some difficult feelings about being an artist and a reminder to not forget who you are.

I’m building a dnd class rn called “Just Some Guy” and the whole thing is that they are just supremely bad at combat and ability checks the whole time. at level 20 u get an ability called “Fucking Finally” where u get the level 1 abilities of another class. ur hit dice are d4s and the only thing u have proficiency in is improvised weapons. this is the funniest thing I’ve done in a hot minute

update on the Just Some Guy class

they're making the sims 4 base game free to play for everyone forever next month

it's gonna be free on every platform too, consoles and computers. October 18th

if you've never played or you've always been interested but deterred by the price NOWS YOUR CHANCE

you can use this tool to get all the dlcs for free, last I checked it works fine on a legal copy

and mods are half the magic. here's how to install them and here's a bunch of gameplay tweaks.

this is just cosmetic stuff but i highly recommend it:

huge directory of cc

noblu/noglo

no white outline

if you find a sims player that you like the style of, check their tumblr for a resources page. they'll often list most of what they use.

have fun and make sure you look for mod updates after each game update

man i love the babes of tumblr*

*people who tell me how to get free shit

trans_irl

The DREAM

I distinctly remember the first time my dad called me my right name. I was sixteen, I’d gotten my driver’s license not too long ago, and now that I was driving, my dad gave me a credit card so I could get gas, or food if I was staying late at school due to marching band. He was very clear, this card was for food and gas only. Only gas and food. Just those two categories of product. He would be checking the bill. I had no desire to buy anything else with this card.

However. Often when getting food after marching practice, or on our scant breaks, I’d drive my friends to burger king or little ceasers or starbucks or whatever, and sometimes not all of my friends could afford the food they wanted. And well…food is food. I have a big appetite, and as long as I didn’t go crazy overboard and order catering for the whole band, a few extra burgers and shakes wouldn’t stand out on a monthly bill. So I bought my friends food. 

I did this for several months, and sometime during that came out to my parents. They both thought it was a phase, and that I would grow out of it. Since they’re not terrible people their approach to me having ‘a boy phase’ was to let me do my thing and wait for me to change my mind. I didn’t change my mind, and eventually they understood that, but that’s a whole other post. The point is my dad didn’t discourage me from transitioning, but avoided talking about it with me. He stopped calling me his daughter, but replaced it with child rather than son, that kind of thing.  

But back to the credit card. Eventually I started feeling guilty. TECHNICALLY I was obeying the rule ‘food and gas only’, but I knew I was bending it. I nervously admitted to him one day that sometimes…on occasion…once in a while… I’d buy a friend food. I waited solemnly for his judgement. He walked over to me, put his hands on my shoulders, looked into my eyes sternly and said,

“Zackary, we are Italian. If you let your friends go hungry….” (and here he decided to shake me just for a little emphasis) “I will disown you.” 

And that’s when I knew he’d come around. Trans? Fine okay sure, give it a shot. Stingy? Get the fuck out. 

Feel like your best friend is the soulmate the devils gives you and your s/o is the soulmate the angels give you. This is specifically in regards to best friends Ryan Bergara and Shane Madej and their partners

People protect a woman who is burning her scarf

A little context for those who don’t know: recently a woman was arrested by the Iranian morality police (who enforce mandatory headscarves and other theocratic policies) and died in custody. This has sparked massive protests across Iran.

And she wasnt even arrested for not using the hijab but bc she was using it "incorrectly". So she was even following the law and still got killed.

They have also tried to claim that she died from natural causes, even when she was 22. And they realesed a very fake video as evidence of that.

THIS. For the love of every thing that is good, if you considered yourself a feminist or a progressive of any sort, support Iranian women. It’s not complicated what is happening. What’s wrong with you people.

In bonobo societies, all bonobos frequently engage in sexual contact with other members of the community, regardless of sex. Female bonobos in particular are quite promiscuous with both fellow females and males; thus, bonobo society is matrilineal or matrifocal. Since the patriline of each member is unknown due to female bonobos having many sexual partners, the female bonobos take communal care of their collective young, and the male bonobos take on other community-care roles instead. It is theorized that this leads to lower levels of violent conflict, as opposed to chimpanzee, human, and other primate societies that are patriarchal, since male members of these societies must find ways to identify their offspring which inevitably leads to violent, controlling behavior toward female members as well as violence & competitive behavior toward other males who may pose a threat to their social statuses. Bonobo societies are extremely peaceful in comparison to other primate societies.

The feature musical film Mamma Mia! (2008), directed by Phyllida Lloyd, shows an example of what a matrifocal society, resembling the structure of bonobo society, could look like for humans; where several females care for a child whose exact paternity is unknown, and instead of violence resort to prosocial behavior (joyfully singing and dancing) in order to resolve conflict. In this essay I will attempt to

heist movie where it’s just 20+ different heist teams from dozens of countries trying to schedule their slotted raid like the world’s most aggressive game of “book the public utility space/community arts hall”

There’s a serial killer in your town. Unfortunately for them you are a necromancer and you have fun driving that maniac insane.

@townofcan Why would leave this masterpiece in the notes