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Spencer Rose

@spenc3r-rose

Aroace flux queer
What I’m about to do has NOT been approved by the Vatican.
17
(he/they)
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Can't let British people have air conditioning because first they'd call it something twee like "the climate fixer" and then in 20 years they'll call it "the climb" or "the climmy"

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French kids would call it "le climot", frustrating language officials who would prefer they call it "machine pour le contrôle du climat froide à l'interieure de l'édifice"

do interact if: you have a hyphenated last name, you're an older sibling, you have a cat, art was your favorite subject, you have kissed your friends, you really like at least one field of science, watch nature documentaries, you drank from the hose, you've been involved with the production of a musical but you never listened to hamilton, have at least one stick-n-poke, drink coffee every day, you have a favorite houseplant, prefer little and big spoon equally, have a dietary restriction, have dyed your hair green, or have been somewhere that you don't speak the language

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jousting is the most human thing ever invented, to me. lets ride on the back of horses and hit eachother with sticks as hard as we can for sport. i think that thought process is what the human spirit is all about

Person 1: i think I heard Person 2 puts razor blades in their Halloween candy, please spread the word #staysafe

Person 2: No i dont do that wtf

Person 1: help…now they’re literally sending their followers to harass and dox me.. I’m gonna die…

The main thing i hate about dc forcing in a bunch of new biological children as legacies/the second gen is that i feel its saying something about the previous legacies. Characters who weren’t biologically related to their mentors sure but still have JUST AS MUCH a right to that title.

its just really off putting to me, like its saying the previous characters didnt really count as successors just because they weren’t biologically related. Like these new characters are the “real” legacies because of their dna

I'm obsessed with court jesters in fantasy stories so have another story concept about it:

A new person is introduced to the king's court, and as soon as they walk in the court jester announces that they are a thief and a fraud and rode in here with stolen horses. And just as the newcome member is about to retaliate, they're advised not to, and explained that nothing the jester says is true, ever. He just says completely baseless and wild shit, recreationally. The newcomer looks at the jester, who is currently bemoaning that the king won't kiss him in public, as if they are lovers. The king looks irate, but leads by example and ignores the jester's idiotic claims.

The more one learns about the court's inner workings, the more apparent it is that the jester really does do that. The false claims and absurd rumours that go around aren't regurgitated by the jester as often as they are apparently started by him, and are proven false on a consistent basis. The only way to make yourself a worse clown than the jester himself is to get defensive about it, or make any attempt to disprove him. Once a drunken high priest embarrasses himself completely by stripping down in front of the court to prove that he does not, in fact, consist of two smaller men standing on each others' shoulders, concealed by the priestly garb.

"And the king is fucking the jester" has become a standard sarcastic retort that people say to imply that someone is a naive fool who believes in wild and false baseless rumours. Along the lines of "You think the old marchioness' handmaid is actually secretly her personal assassin? Do you also believe that the king is fucking the jester?"

But if one could wiggle their way all the way through to the deepest bottom layers of court scheming without getting killed along the way, it turns out that there are a handful of these claims that actually are true, but nobody would ever believe them - or believe you if you told them about it - because the truth is disguised as such open-faced blatant lies that you'd look like a fool trying to actually prove them. And all of these most outrageous things are schemes that re-inforce the power of the throne or directly benefit the king. And the system is so sturdy that the jester could flat-out say that out loud and nobody would believe it because it's the jester saying it.

Because the truth is, the king is fucking the jester.