also gosh I'm slow, tumblr ate the notification

The only day you can reblog this post

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WHY ARE YOU ALL LIKE THIS?? :(

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The Hell is this bullshit >:T its just a computer crashing get over it

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have decided to abandon all my preconceived notions of self/attempts at presentation and become this guy

this 👆🏾

Do these straight people just like

Not actually comprehend anything happening right in front of them

heteronormativity is a hell of a drug

May I add:

Once on Facebook I mentioned getting married at a big mad max themed campout. One of the guys that regularly attends told me to take my wife to visit his camp for a drink. I told him my husband, actually.

And he then said “wow, I’m sorry, I’ve never met a girl named dave before! Now I’ve seen everything.”

This dude thought I was a girl name David before he thought I was a gay man. Straight people are wild.

as a straight guy, please don't group me in with this stupidity. because this is really unbelievable how oblivious people are.

Disney movies and cartoons

The Walt Disney Company as a corporation

Keep in mind, I’m talking specifically about the higher ups here. The people who make all the business decisions.

I ain’t talking about the hard-working writers and animators and directors and shit.

This is how I feel about most companies. The content is either good, enjoyable, or useful, and I still like consuming it, but the company in general is shitty (again, like the higher ups and stuff, not those working for the company who are literally working their asses off just trying to make a living)

Finally a post about Disney Im not rolling my eyes at, thank you

Cats are just like "hmm I'm small fluffy :3 Oh I'm just baby ;3 Did you know I have 48 knives hidden in my body? >¦3"

I'll do it for you, creamy

the only character tropes that matter:

-mad scientist

-goth

-chaotic dumbass

you. you get it

Megamind is all of these

Mikdolittles Animals

foxes are the best

Make your game more morally grey by having all celestials summoned to the material plane randomly kick the nearest person in the junk as hard as they can before they do anything else.

Make your gameplay more morally grey by having the DM randomly kick the nearest player in the junk before the session begins

Make your gameplay morally greyer by having everyone randomly kick the nearest person in the junk before taking an action

Staff: *bans female presenting nipples*

Me: goddamnit this is exactly how Japanese tentacle porn was created

Japanese. Tentacle. Porn.

Alright everyone sit your asses down and shut up I’m finna learn y’all a thing

Ok so in the early 1900s there’s this dude named Franz Ferdinand and then there’s some peeps that wanna kill him. They all get together one day to kill him while he’s in his car. The first one was a pussy and chickened out and the second one threw a grenade but forgot to factor in the delay so it blew up way passed his car so he took cyanide and jumped into a river but the cyanide was expired and therefore useless and the river was like six inches deep. The rest of them were like “fuck this” and went to get a sandwich. However, Ferdinand’s driver took a wrong turn and was like “oh well I’ll just turn around at this sandwich shop” and the guys were like “oh shit isn’t that the guy we’re trying to kill” and they shot him starting WW1.

The Germans got their asses handed to them in WW1 causing them to get all butthurt and put hitler into power. Around this time Japan was trying to take over eastern Asia (basically just a small portion of China but its the thought that counts) and Germany was like “hey do you guys wanna be friends and take over the world together?” And Japan was like “hell ya my dude” and WW2 started. Also Italy was there. Anyway Germany/Japan/Italy all got their asses kicked and much like post WW1 Germany, Japan got a much stricter government. Their new strict government outlawed porn but the people of Japan were horny and one guy was like “hey guys do you remember those American soldiers that were just here kicking our asses? Well they brought these things called comic books so maybe we could make porn in comic book style” thus the birth of hentai. But then the government tried to ban that because it still showed dicks and dicks weren’t allowed so they started drawing porn with any relitively dick shaped object, the most popular being tentacles. It became so popular that even after the porn ban was lifted people continued making tentacle porn because it was such a widespread fetish.

The assassination of Franz Ferdinand lead to the creation of Japanese tentacle porn

so for some reason this post has disappeared off my dash so i spent forever searching to bring it back again you’re welcome 

This a Moonmelon, scientifically knows as asidus. This fruit grows in some parts of Japan, and is known for its vibrant blue color. What you probably don’t know about this fruit is that it can switch flavors after you eat it. Everything sour will taste sweet, everything salty will taste bitter, and it gives water a strong orange-like taste. It’s also very expensive…costing about ￥16000 JPY (which is about 200 dollars).

or you know this could be photoshopped

but idk

you tell me

this is alexandrias melon (wow)

it never grows seeds but it can still produce other melons (its magic)

it is grown deep in the jungles of peru and can prevent you from aging well into the hundreds

it is known by the natives there as k’uhul ajaw cacao shi-jiiy.

its really strange how all of these pictures look exactly the same because everything on the internet is true

This is the Peppermeloni. (seriously gosh just look at that sexy mother fucker) Its scientific name is Tumblrous Pepperonus.

The only known specimen is in a pot in David Karps treasure dungeon. It is a tradition that a single slice is given to every tumblr blog that reaches 500,000 followers.

It has the remarkable property of being as healthy as watermelon but tasting like cheesy pepperoni pizza.

This planet is really just so amazing guys wow.

Patrickmelon

The taste of this melon will always surprise you.

I’m fucking done with this site

This is the evermelon.

If you cut this watermelon a certain way you will find that it has seemingly regenerated. You can do this an infinite number of times and will have a neverending supply of melon.

OH GOD I haven’t seen this post in YEARS and THAT is the fucking additon to it!?

ALRIGHT THATS IT ITS TIME TO STOP

Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Ravenmelon and I’m ebony black  (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips, and a lot of people tell me I look like watermelons (AN: if u don’t know what dat is get da hell out of here!).

Nothing will ever be better than the last one

HASHBFJGJDHRJFKFKRJ

That last one took me out at the god damn kneecaps-

scout’s VA brings us that A+ phrasing as always

He’s bi 👏👏👏

You deadass??

this is like a group chat

Y’ALL

just what in the fresh hell is this shit y'all got me FUCKED UP

something is getting fried alright…..and it’s the person responsible.

prepare the electric chair.

when you draw a face, but you never bothered to get the body right first.

With the power of Photoshop we can combine our art skills…

…and create perfection.

This is beautiful

or better yet,

She has been wooed~

Never forget true romance 💕

I love the gif because there’s an incredible number of mistakes crammed into just a couple of seconds. 

1. how the hole starts in the wall but it keeps moving forward

2. then magically heals itself

3. the triceratops walks right through the wall

4. the table blinking before the dinosaurs appear

5. both tables disappear

6. so suddenly appear again as they are toppling over

7. two people clipping into running without any transition 

8. the table outline hides a man’s legs but there is no table

9. the triceratops horns aren’t white in the second clip

10. tables changing both color and material in the second clip

11. a carnivorous dinosaur’s first instinct is to go and eat a whole plate with salad

I miss traditional 2D animation… 3D CGI doesn’t get you masterworks like this