memes

More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married

It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve

I want to expound upon “comedians couldn’t get married” thing because it’s actually really interesting. Satire was respected in Ancient Ireland. It was thought to have great power, enough to physically maim the subject one was making jokes about. Satirists could bring down kings with a witty enough insult. That was actually their original function. When the king didn’t do right by his people, a bard was supposed to compose a poem so scathing it would raise welts on the king’s skin to oust him (it was illegal for a “blemished” king to rule.) Unwarranted satire was considered a form of assault. So what it boils down to is ancient Celts being like “These people are too dangerous to reproduce. DO NOT TRUST THEM WITH CHILDREN. EVER.”

whats a king to a bard

Thats literally a dnd skill

Vicious mockery at sixth level

This should be the new M&M commercial!

Its nice that we get to die someday. Imagine being immortal and suddenly you remember all the emberassing things you did in the last 2000 years. Horrible

Me, as a vampire: oh geez

Friend: What’s wrong

Me: Just remembered that time in 1654 when the tavern maid said “Enjoyeth thy meal!” I replied with “Thee as well”

Some guy in Ancient Greece, pointing at a perfectly climbable mountain: There are gods up there!

The rest of Ancient Greece: Sick, no need to fact check that 

Why is Ohio always brought into the strangest posts?

Because Ohio is that strange of a place.

me after eating a large meal: i am never eating again !!

me thirty minutes later:

I just noticed that’s a hand with a glove around her neck not a scarf

what thef uck

The Haunting Of Hill House (Dir. Mike Flanagan 2018)

the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ‘hang on, doesn’t milk soothe chilli burns? it does’ and i couldn’t google because i couldn’t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn’t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don’t really cook much.

Chance The Rapper just won this season of SNL

When you lie on the application but get the job anyway and now you have to do the work.

I’m crying 😂

Chance stay OTS on camera 😂💗

I see no difference in energy here

I love this cat even if he is so dirty he ruins my hand every time I pat him

That’s dusty dan you fool

Please do not tell me lies about my favourite neighbour. His name is on his collar: “Albert (Bertie)”

Dirty Bertie

I wasnt gonna reblog but this pic took me out ^ 😂