Just Me Doin' Me

oh to be a chunky orange farm cat 

I HAVE A CHUNKY ORANGE FARM CAT

his name is bathtub

oh i love bathtub

3500 years ago a bunch of people decided to build a tower to the sky and now I have to worry about keeping up my Duolingo streak

why would you blame the people reaching for heaven instead of the god who cursed them

add that one to the list, boys

You're right and you should say it

staff today

hermey the elf was transgender

female elves:

male elves:

hermey:

you can be a different gender than the one you were assigned at birth but may god forgive you if you want to be a dentist

This is the skin of a killer bella

I will reblog this every Christmas season I’m on tumblr.

It’s beginning to look a lot like shit scram

Oh my god

i call my parents and say ‘yeah i can’t do family stuff tonight, i got too much stuff to do for school’ and i e-mail my professor and say ‘i can’t do my assignments tonight, work got crazy’ and i text my boss and say ‘sorry i can’t work late tonight, i gotta some family stuff’ and through this triangulation of deceitful excuses i at last will be free

When they first started dating, my best friend's boyfriend was like, "I just kinda feel like you two are uncomfortably close sometimes. All of my friends agree that it's really weird, and I think we need to establish some boundaries."

And I sat him down and gave him this huge speech, like, "Listen, the ability to maintain intimate, long-lasting friendships is a sign that your partner is well-adjusted! It's a little worrying that you're feeling insecure about your partner having a healthy, normal friendship."

Only for her to walk in two seconds later and say, "This drink is disgusting, you have to try it," and, instead of offering me a sip, take a huge swig and spit it directly into my mouth from like three feet away.

There's just so much going on here but I want to focus on the fact that this apparently happens so often that you saw her take a swig and instinctively opened your mouth for her to spit in it.

Who are you, OP? What is your life?

#if you’re 17 and you came here in 2017 i’m sorry to tell you that YOU are the sadsack in this scenario #i’m like the chernobyl grandma that won’t leave but you saw the reactor melt and THEN you MOVED here (x)

i am not my mother and i am not my father but a third worse thing

is there bible fanfiction on ao3

got shot fucking dead the second i searched it

i’m like 95% sure nobody on this site actually knows what rawing means

hallowed be thy ween

you’re gonna hollow out my what

your ween

how y’all feelin

TEARS OF THE KINGDOM LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOJSJAHSBSJZND JSKSKDIDKF