Black cats are lucky. (via leahweissmuller)
im going to fucking cry
one WILD think about my ADHD is while I do definitely have Time Blindness, I’m also weirdly good at guessing the current time?
How to explain it... it’s like I black out for a while? but then a timer goes off in my head that snaps me back into focus all of a sudden. I’ll think, “oh I bet it’s 6:30 now,” and sure enough, I’ll be a few minutes off, but basically correct.
And it’s frustrating because I’ll be hyperaware of how much time is passing, and realize how little I’ve achieved in that duration. Sometimes I won’t even be able to recall a single thing I’d just done. It’s almost like waking up after a dream, completely aware you just skipped ahead in time, but only feeling like it had been a few moments.
woah you put it in words
Symptoms vs. Impairment
Sometimes symptoms of ADHD can sound abstract. What does it mean in your everyday life to have a short attention span or poor impulse control?
The book says, “Symptoms alone aren’t enough to produce a diagnosis of ADHD. You have to be impaired by those symptoms.”
Impairment is anything that is negatively affecting your life, more than the average person. The book defines it as “the social and other consequences or costs that result from expressing the symptoms of ADHD.”
So if some symptoms can sound abstract, how do you know if you’re actually impaired by them? I mean… doesn’t everybody get distracted sometimes or make a random impulse purchase? (More on this idea later.)
I found these questions to be super helpful in making the abstract more concrete.
Attention Span
- Do you quickly get bored during repetitive tasks?
- Do you shift from one uncompleted activity to another frequently? (e.g., starting to clean the bathroom but then switching to go unload the dishwasher)
- Do you lose concentration frequently during a long or complicated task (like writing an essay or doing your taxes)?
- Do you have a hard time completing homework or work projects without being nagged by your teacher/professor/boss?
- Do you become easily distracted when something new enters your field of vision (someone walking by, a bug zooming past, etc.)? And when you do, do you find it difficult to bring your mind back to the task at hand?
- Do unbidden or irrelevant thoughts pop into your mind and then take you on a mental tangent that breaks your focus on a particular task?
Impulse Control/Delayed Gratification
- Do people criticize you for not thinking ahead?
- Do people frequently ask you “What were you thinking?”?
- Do you often interrupt others? Are you frequently embarrassed by saying something you wish you could take back?
- Do you dominate conversations?
- Do you put off errands when you expect you’ll have to wait in a long line, like at the post office or bank?
- Do you overeat or eat when you aren’t hungry?
- Do you spend every penny you earn, even if you have something you really want to save up for?
- Do you speed when you drive? Do you get angry when those around you are driving too slowly?
- Do you get frustrated or upset easily?
Excessive Activity
- Are you always moving, even when you are seated–rocking, tapping feet/hands/fingers, leg bouncing, etc.?
- Do you find things in your environment to fidget with–pens, clothes, hair, whatever’s lying around?
- Do you frequently doodle in your notes? Do you find that you concentrate better when you do?
- Do you often feel antsy or restless, like you need to be up and about, doing something?
Source: Taking Charge of Adult ADHD by Russell A. Barkley, PhD with Christine M. Benson
“ADHD is under-diagnosed in girls because the diagnostic criteria were written for boys and girls just don’t have those symptoms as often”
I mean, true.
But that’s not the whole story.
ayyo tf is this
Executive Dysfunction advice: ONE thing at a time
So I’ve been using the ‘pre-planning’ method to get around executive dysfunction for a while now.. and I’m happy to say that I’ve been having a lot of success with it. I’ve gone from needing 3+ days to start something to just 1.
The method is essentially to sit down and make an outline of what needs to be done beforehand. It sounds simple and obvious but let me explain the WHY.
We ADHDers suck at switching attention from one task to another (set-shifting) and we have difficulty looking at the big picture. Its why we have difficulty starting.. your mind doesn’t know where to start and it gets intimidated.
HOWEVER, we are very good at doing ONE thing at a time. So take some time beforehand to break up your work in multiple ONE things.
It’s like how the planning aspect of cooking is difficult.. however, if you prepare all of the ingredients beforehand, it becomes significantly easier.
Just breaking down your work into pieces, as is often advised, doesn’t help at all unless you break it into ONE thing chunks.
The ONE thing chunks have to be one task that doesn’t require your brain to set shift.. to switch attention.
So at the very start, plan it out. Instead of having to use your brain to look at the whole picture over and over, which is draining, do it just once at the start. Then break it down to the ONE thing chunks.
Now each of your work is in bite sized chunks that you don’t need to <think> for.
So an example, if I need to research something and write a paper on it..
I’d first break up the research into specific topics that I can research, one at a time.
I’d also break up the outline and structure of the paper, and plan out how and the general gist of what needs to be said.
Practical Tips for ADHD College Students
I know a few posts like this already exist, but I wanted to add my own experiences to the mix in case it would be helpful to someone else. Some of these will look familiar, some not so much.
Disclaimers: 1) What works for me may not work for you, take everything with a grain of salt and experiment, 2) These are what I’m using for a 4-year school but I imagine it would be applicable for any college? I wish I’d known to do some of these things when I was at CC, 3) I won’t pretend that I am an ADHD success story, not yet. I’m still finding my way, learning to cope, learning to thrive. It’s a process.
NOTE: This post is kinda long; if it’s too long I recommend just reading the bolded/italicized headings and only reading the ones that pique your interest :)
Sensory Issues:
- Wear comfortable clothing: Screw the mentality that you always have to look your best in college. At the end of the day, feeling hot but ridiculously uncomfortable will trigger sensory issues (especially if you’re someone who is sensitive to certain materials/styles of clothing) and it will impact concentration and can cause a lot of distress. Are you comfortable in those sweatpants, pajama bottoms, baggy shirts? Cool, wear them.
- Stim toys: Love yourself, buy (or make!) stim toys and bring them to school. Can’t speak for CC because I didn’t use stim toys when I went, but at my 4-year school everyone is too busy drowning in deadlines to notice you squishing thinking putty or using a fidget cube under the table.
- Try different stim toys: I used to get caught up on trying to make the more popular stim toys work for me when they didn’t, so I had to experiment a bit to see what worked. It’s not always as simple as cubes, spinners, squishy toys, etc. If you have issues with texture you’ll want to really experiment, especially with things like putty, squishibles, etc. to see what is comfortable and what isn’t. But there’s a big ol’ market out there!
- Headphones/Earplugs: The single most helpful sensory detail for me was always bringing my headphones to campus. I get easily overstimulated in uncontrolled situations with lots of different sounds. I make sure my volume is enough to block the noise out, but the songs I choose in these instances are usually familiar, so they don’t provide too much new stimulation when I can’t handle it. I also keep earplugs in my backpack for exams.
Studying/School Related:
- If possible, leave your house: This has been one of the hardest changes I’ve had to make because I’m an introvert and genuinely prefer being home. But I’m starting to learn that my ass will not do work 9/10 times when I’m home. Too much to do, too many other things to get done, lots of fun distractions, and cats! So many cats! Unfortunately cats won’t take my exams. I’ve found that the library is okay, but for me small cafes worked much better. Armed with my headphones, some coffee, and an atmosphere that caters to silently getting work done, I’m able to focus longer, and to focus on what I really need to.
- Note-taker: Admittedly I’m talking out of my ass on this one, because I haven’t yet done this. But that’s exactly why I want to stress getting a note-taker. My college life would be infinitely better if I’d done this when the semester started; instead, my notes have gaps where I couldn’t concentrate, or couldn’t process what was being discussed, etc.
- Other accommodations: Accommodations for ADHD differ depending on the college, but some of the common ones are: note-takers, silent exam spaces, assignment extensions, and use of tech such as recorders, speech-to-text software… If you’re like I was and are worried that you’re asking too much asking for accommodations, remember two important things: 1) Accommodations exist to level the playing field, not to give us an edge, and 2) YOU PAY FOR THIS SERVICES. That huge, overwhelming tuition bill with all those “extra fees”? You’re paying for these services already, might as well take advantage of them!
- Talk to your professors: This part is truly terrifying for me, but I’ve started opening up this semester to my professors and it has made a difference. The professor for my hardest class actually has a son with adhd so she understood and was even able to provide me with some resources that would help. At the very least, it made my professors aware of my struggles and aware that I wasn’t just being lazy, which calmed my RSD a bit.
- Organization: Staying organized is important for any college student, but especially for those with adhd. We lose things a lot, and if things aren’t in obvious, constant places it becomes so much easier to lose or forget where we put things. That being said, your ‘organized’ will probably not be other peoples ‘organized’. For example, I use my Ipsy bags for organization. One holds any writing utensils, flashcards, and post-its, another holds anything medical-related, etc. It seems a bit cluttered and disorganized to other people but it works for me. So try keeping things in the same spot if possible, but remember that finding what organizational structures work for you might take time and effort. If your school has success coaching, I highly recommend it for this purpose! Which brings me to the next point.
- Success Coaching: Most colleges offer some kind of program like this, though names may differ. Success Coaching is designed for students of any academic level in order to help them get and stay on track. My college offers study skills, schedule planning, test prep, time management, help navigating campus resources, and a whole host of others. And the people doing the coaching are usually grad students who’ve been through the process. They’re typically trained in working with students with adhd, because that tends to be a significant portion of their students. They’re also just really nice to talk to. Almost like a therapist, but not quite.
- Really forgetful? The best thing you can do is change your environment, not try to change yourself. You probably won’t be able to stop your brain from forgetting your notebook at home, but you can get a five subject and keep it in your backpack at all times. Same with folders. Keep losing pens/pencils? Just get a fuckton and shove them in a pouch in your backpack in the beginning of the semester. I’m not kidding when I say I have at least 20 pens and pencils in mine, not including the glitter pens and highlighters.
- Planners: Many people have said that it will take time to find just the right planner for you, and they’re correct. The planner I use right now is 8x11 with wide boxes. Some prefer smaller planners, others will use planner apps or just the calendar in their phone. You’ll have to mess around a bit to see what works for you, but you do have options!
- Printables: Oh man I love printables so much, but a lot of the time I find that they’re more trouble maintaining than my adhd can handle. You can find a ton on tumblr, free to download and print, and some very beautiful packs for sale on etsy. Right now I use a monthly budget printable and one for studying terms/definitions. Sometimes the adhd mind needs something pretty and different to cling to, so I try to switch things up every so often.
- Color-coding: This absolutely will not work for everyone (I’ve seen people say color-coding notes gets the hung up on the coding and not the notes, and I can definitely see that happening). For me, I use color-coding in my planner. Each class gets its own color. This keeps me from seeing a page covered in the same color of ink or pencil and mentally blocking it out. Gelly roll has the most amazing glitter pens!
- Test prep: Will vary depending on the person and how they learn best, but for me I’ve found that no one method will work on its own. I have class notes, typed notes, hand-written flashcards, flashcards on quizlet. I won’t pretend that it’s easy; it’s fuck-all time consuming and sometimes I don’t have energy for it, but depending on the class I usually need a combination of at least two different methods to work. This is definitely something success coaching can work with you to figure out!
General Life Advice (that will impact college):
- Get on a sleep schedule: I don’t even care what your particular schedule is (because it’ll vary person to person) but just get on one. Much easier said than done, because our brains never want to shut up at night, but lack of a consistent sleep schedule will mess with your concentration, focus, hypersensitivity, etc.
- I’ll just do this later…: is the adhd monster talking. What even is later? Does it exist? Sometimes I have to tell myself “nope, we’re doing this right now!” Doesn’t always work, but I try my hardest to do things in the moment if executive dysfunction isn’t at my door.
- Develop a support system: This can be difficult because sometimes making and maintaining friendships with adhd can be hard, and sometimes family members aren’t very receptive or supportive. But a strong support system can make all the difference in the world! If your current friends don’t understand the extent of what you’re dealing with, send some resources their way and you might be surprised how fast they get in your corner. But sometimes people without adhd just don’t get it. If your college has a meet-up for students with adhd like mine does, this is a great place to meet like-minded students who understand what you’re going through and can provide support and advice!
I’m going to stop this here because it’s already too long, but I hope this is helpful to someone and I’d love it if you could add your own tips as well!
adhd friendly reading tipp: main points are bold
so recently i made a post critiquing the adhd community and how it is centered around relatability and not the issues ppl with adhd face, intersectionality & growth. I’d like to add on how the over saturation of relatable content is a bit dangerous.
ADHD awareness and #relatable #struggles are a good thing imo. They’re a good thing because people with adhd start to realize that certain patterns and behaviors that are adhd related shortly after being diagnosed or self diagnosed. Relatable content is necessary as it’s a part of the process to unlearn self hate and come to terms with certain behaviors that arent your fault. This is why this relatable adhd content IS important to many, as ppl are still in that stage or need a quick reminder.
I do have a two major issues with this type of content though:
1. #ADHD_STRUGGLES can be/ are being used to avoid accountability
It is easy to say “I did this because I have ADHD”. Yes, adhd can make it easier for us to make mistakes or behave in a certain manner. Yes, it might be very difficult for us to do/not do certain things or controll our impulses (in my case lol) even if we try. But that doesn’t change the fact that our actions or adhd induced behaviors can still hurt people. You still need to apologize and try to avoid doing it again. Even if it does’t work out its important that you try.
TIPP: Its helpful to explain to that person what you are doing to avoid doing something again and what might be challenging for you. Because that way they know u are trying and feel that their concern/hurt is being taken seriously.
I have seen a lot of influencers and tiktokers use their adhd as an excuse to avoid accountability. If they can’t recognize that people were hurt by their actions and thus it is up to them to work on the issue. Adhd shouldn’t be a “get out of jail free card”.
2. #ADHD_CULTURE isn’t a culture
Yes, a lot of people with adhd can share similar experiences, especially if they already have something else besides adhd in common (background, upbringing, gender, hobbies, etc.) But that does not mean the adhd experience is universal.
Getting diagnosed with adhd is a privilege and it is often seen as a white people thing, because they have easier access to this. Making adhd seem like a culture or a brand just further adds on to the alienation especially BIPOC and other marginalized ppl with adhd already feel.
That is why i’m not really into influencers who are known for something else using their platform to act like adhd is their quirky branding. You should not be the face of adhd. You can and should use your platform to talk about adhd struggles. But you should also use your platform to help the adhd community.
agree wholeheartedly
My Disorder Hates Online Learning, So I Had A Self-Intervention
Hi guys! It’s been awhile since I last came on here, which will be explained later in this post, but I felt like I should share this event with you all in hopes of inspiring you to do the same!
Since online learning, my motivation to do anything has been completely drained. I stopped working out, I stopped playing the piano, I dropped a lot of my usual hygiene routine, I began to sit around for hours on end, and overall stopped caring about my health and well-being.
My screen time was getting longer and longer everyday, and it’s at the point where it’s a daily average of 14 hours (yep, more than HALF A DAY). This is really embarrassing and shameful for me to post, but I feel like this is necessary to break down the barriers that prevent us from normalizing conversation about this topic.
So, I had a self intervention.
I started by doing really simple things such as waking up a bit earlier to make myself breakfast. I had gotten out of the habit of making myself breakfast in favor of getting another hour of sleep. While sleep is important, so is breakfast, and I needed to stop taking it for granted. ever since I started waking up earlier to do this, I’ve been finding online school SO much more tolerable after starting the day healthy.
The second step I took during my self intervention was getting off of my phone. I could quite literally feel my eyes burning every day from looking at a screen so often. So everyday at 2:35, right after school ends for me, I would get up and take my dog for at least a ten minute walk, only looking at my phone to check the time. It gets you up and moving, and also encourages you to appreciate your natural surroundings.
The third step I took was getting my hygiene routine under control. To be honest, I still struggle with this every once in awhile, but that’s ok! you know why? because I’m making the effort, and that’s what counts. I did this very easily, and I hope this trick works for you too. I began playing a YouTube video and challenging myself to finish my routine either before or by the time the video ends. I try to find videos around 10-15 minutes long but find one that accommodates your own routine.
I realized that entertaining myself while still focusing on getting everything done works really well for me. I can laugh at something before bed AND ensure that I’m brushing my teeth, washing my face, and combing my hair every night.
Even if they’re baby steps, they’re still progress and they’ve made me feel very put together lately. I feel great about myself and I have a renewed sense of motivation. If you decide it’s time for a switch up, I hope these are easily applicable to your routine and work for you just as well as they work for me. Stay safe out there, life is tough right now 💙
A big part of ADHD (and Graves' disease, which can give similar symptoms) is feeling like it's your fault somehow.
That if you did just try harder or put "more effort in", you'd somehow stop struggling.
There can be times where you're at the absolute end of your rope, emotionally and physically exhausted, and you'll still feel like pushing yourself because you "could" be productive right now.
I'm here to tell you to STOP. When you reach those moments, do not suffer in an attempt to get more work done - let's be honest, if you're in that state, the work you do isn't going to reflect your capability anyway.
Right now, you might feel like "productivity" is defined by working or studying or something similar.
This is a lie. Right now, productivity is defined by self-care. Don't try to push the exhaustion aside, even if there are deadlines on the horizon. Right now, focus on keeping YOU healthy enough that you don't end up breaking down. If you've already broken down, now's the time to stop it from happening again.
Drink some cold water, and eat some food. This does NOT have to involve cooking either! Have a microwave meal. Eat cereal out of a mug or a glass. Don't have the executive function available to make a sandwich? Eat the ham slices and bread by themselves.
Can't find the energy to wash up, but you need dishes? Rinse a dish with boiled water. No, it's not the same, but it'll do for now, just for the moment.
The washing up and the cleaning and the deadlines and the stress can WAIT.
Productivity isn't just stuff that affects other people. It's also doing stuff that helps YOU.
You won't be able to properly do the other stuff if your body and mind are shutting down.
I figure out I had ADHD last year, but I didn’t seek an official diagnosis and medication until this year. I’m 30 years old, my school days are long behind me. I slipped through the cracks because I have predominately inattentive type and I was a quiet little girl. Having ADHD does not mean you have to be hyperactive and loud, it means you have a processing problem in your brain that doesn’t allow you to regulate your focus or emotions.
Mental health even now is still taboo to talk about. People are more open now than ever about it however and that gives me hope.
This is a profoundly personal comic and it only reflects my own experience with ADHD. It is on a spectrum with a wide range of personalities. But if my story connects with someone else and helps them, that would mean the world to me.
im undiagnosed... but i struggle the same, i dont know maybe i am still havent tried my hardest- but i believe my struggles are valid. ive done my own research and i believe i might have adhd. thank you for this post