overwatch is a silly piece of shit on its best days but its continued insistence that magic is real but only in japan is especially hysterical
hanzo and genji have haunted their hodgepodge of a narrative since 2016 with unambiguously magic powers in a soft-SF setting that went out of its way to conceptualise bogus technology like hard-light and biotics in order to fit its weirdness into some kind of "science" category. the fact they then didn't extend that consideration to hanzo and genji? they just left them as is? as witches? as fate-touched human vessels of ancient dragon spirits?? if genji wasn't a cyborg they could feasibly be minor sekiro bosses and that's weird dude!! and then kiriko gets released?? and these people had all the years in between ow1 and ow2 to find a way to hand-wave whatever weird shamanistic magic they accidentally let get into the game, and instead they make the only other japanese character a fucking spirit vessel as well. they doubled down. magic IS REAL in overwatch but ONLY on the BEAUTIFUL ISLANDS OF JAPAN, and no it's never ever going to be addressed because overwatch has as much coherent story as a themed puzzle page on the back of a kids cereal box. hysterical.
this also extends to the ability to wall climb
overwatch said if you are japanese you can do the following:
- contain within you ancient spirit magic with powerful destructive and/or restorative capabilities
- parkour
As a disabled kid who was in the same phys ed class as everyone else with predictably horrifying results, HARD SAME
“Nobody should have to compete against people with biological advantages in the biological advantage assessment game!”
in middle school our grade in PE was how well we did in comparison to the rest of the class.
got the fastest mile? congrats, you have the 100%. the rest of us? we were fucked. fuck effort, fuck improvement, fuck participation and attitude, it was all about competition.
as a little kid, I enjoyed community sports a lot, and then around middle school i got heavier and worse at running and suddenly sports were just... off limits. the focus was entirely on being a good, competitive team and "kids having a fun time, getting exercise, and making friends" meant nothing. refusing to allow trans kids to play is the exact same principle
reminder to worldbuilders: don't get caught up in things that aren't important to the story you're writing, like plot and characters! instead, try to focus on what readers actually care about: detailed plate tectonics
Fully losing it at this facebook screenshot. 22 inches of green and 1.5 of carrot.
Sorry to everyone who’s enjoyed the last 130 years of science and culture journalism, but Disney needs the money to fund Toy Story 9
Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.
Anonymous asked:
What's your jacking off technique
Tumblr, buddy, listen to me. This is an unprecedented opportunity. You can snap up all of the pie here, and become defacto internet goodguy easy. All you gotta do is... drop the nsfw ban. Unambiguously. Announce that dicks are back on the menu. You want people subscribed the blogs? You want people to actually use your Post+ function? Porn. Let us use it for porn. The youngins aren't joining this site anyway, you're not competing with tiktok. The vaguely horny 20-40 demographic though? You can have that. You can have all of that. Think about it.
Do you know how many pinup artists alone are itching to come back to tumblr, but dont because of the unclear, seemingly arbitrary application of your nsfw policy? These are insanely talented people who are practically begging to give you content. For free. But you gotta change the policy. We can't keep dancing around this. Just think of publicity. The drama. A complete 180. You'd kill it tumblr. You could make it happen. Please.
dropped my phone on my balls
my spell worked
