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Life Crawling Along Slowly Be Like.

@sleeping-semi-easy

Daria/24/genderfluid/queer/they and them pronouns/super whiney/ loves cats

I am a teacher in the US.

I can barricade a classroom in less than a minute. I know that when the fire alarm goes off we lock ourselves in the room until someone confirms it's real so we don't get shot evacuating the building. I am trained to pack a bullet wound and apply a tourniquet. My classroom is organized with an active shooter in mind - filing cabinets in front of glass, big desks one shove away from blocking a door, hiding places out of sight of the windows. I have come to terms with the knowledge that I might die protecting my students when all I want to do is show them poetry is fun and teach creative writing.

When I was eleven years old, I helped the younger kids on my bus hide under their seats and place their bags against the wall because a gunman came on to campus.

When I twelve I sat in the dark against the concrete wall with all my fellow class mates. We had our bags places over our bodies to act as some sort of shield. I texted my mom that I loved her just in case something happened.

I was fourteen when I had to crowd with other students into the elementary school gym to take notes for day. We were later told a person threatened to blow up our school so that’s why we had been moved.

I was fifteen when I sat paralyzed watching the students run out of Marjory Stoneman Douglas. The only times I could move was to text my best friend over and over again. “Pls tell me your safe!” “Pls be okay” “pls”. When I finally got her call at nine that night, I cried so hard and we sobbed together for an hour.

After every school shooting I think about these moments. I text my friend to ask if she’s alright. And I cry knowing our politicians are going to let another one happen.

“Men do not individually oppress women, the system of the patriarchy does” who do you think acts as agents of the patriarchy. Who do you think passes over women for jobs, harasses women, belittles their female family members, makes sexist jokes. It’s men, it’s literally individual men. We can actually name the people doing it, we don’t need to blame an unseen force that controls men who are incapable acting on their own thoughts and impulses

I'm out of words and patience to explain once again that 'empowering' does not mean 'makes me feel confident/good/strong/powerful'. for something to be empowering it actually has to be enfranchising, it has to give you power not just the feeling of power. male approval is not empowering no matter how much it makes you feel like you have power over men by being sexy to them. this fantasy of leading lustful idiotic men around by the dick serves only men.