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chaos, shenanigans, tomfoolery etc etc

@skeletonfromthecloset

indi he/they, queer & genderfluid
walking disaster <3

i feel like we as a fandom never talk enough about jesper's self-loathing.

yes, he's the boy who hypes himself up and laughs at his own jokes and seemingly brims with confidence. but he's also the boy who thinks he has a "lying, thieving, worthless heart." he's also the boy who ends every thought with "or me. maybe i'll fail." he's also the boy so deeply entrenched in denial that he can hardly see past it, and has to be told that "there is more than one kind of sickness."

his life, unlike the other crows', hasn't been one bad thing after another, so he doesn't think he has a right to his feelings. he's had every opportunity to be enough, and he still isn't. he's never enough. he's "just a born loser. fights. cards. boys. girls. you'll keep playing until you lose." he was never taught to hate himself. he was never enslaved. he was never left alone in the world with no one to fight for him. but he's a mess anyway, and he hates himself for it.

which is why his ending is so perfect. read to me, that's enough. stay away from gambling halls, that's enough. try to fabrikate, fail, it'll be enough. enough, enough, enough. he's enough.

does anybody else ever feel weird about interacting with posts from huge blogs?? or like if it’s really popular or something??? idk, for some reason it feels like capitalism to me, if that makes sense??? like i feel great rbing posts from smaller creators, artists etc but when it comes to like huge pages i feel like i’m a part of the capitalist regime

part 0.5 for this sad little prompt; stobin s3 starcourt bathroom scene ⭐️🍦 【☆】★【☆】【☆】★【☆】【☆】★【☆】【☆】★【☆】

“have you…ever been in love?”

he couldn’t move. forming words were hard to come by for steve. many thoughts filled the boy’s mind while his lips could not separate. he tried to will them to open, but it was no good. it felt like there was a thread tying his lips closed. the echo of robin’s voice had died out by now, yet it still felt like the question was fresh off her tongue. steve did not have a good answer.

“steve? you od over there?”

to steve, verbal did not come as easy, still seeming far too troublesome for this moment.

“no, no, uh, just…thinking.”

“about what?”

about what, he could not tell her. steve loves robin, sees her as the best friend he wishes he had in high school, and trusts her with his all. but this? it was different. what if she’s not safe? what if she hates him? steve doesn’t think he could lose robin. he really feels like he made a real friend in her.

“just…i don’t know, actually.” it wasn’t entirely a lie. his thoughts were kind of all over the place. but it was still a lie, nonetheless. robin seemed to believe it, and the two sat in comfortable silence.

for a short while, steve wondered if robin had passed out, she was so quiet. however, she soon scoffed, denying his thought. “are you still in love with nancy? god, she is such a priss.”

robin had practically whispered the last part; steve almost missed it.

“turns out, not really,” he said. that received him another scoff. “but are you?” she was referring back to her original question steve had tried to avoid. he never liked answering questions about himself. (surely robin knew this; he had managed to get out of self-introductions on the first day of click’s class, claiming he had terrible anxiety. While that was a lie then, it was not, now; not since the upside down).

“no.”

“why not?”

because there is no ‘still.’

he never did love nancy, not like that.

and steve knows it was cruel. dating her to keep himself safe was necessary but so wrong. she genuinely made him feel loved at a time; she had loved him. yet, he could never love her back, not in the way she once thought he did. so, he wasn’t too heartbroken over their breakup in ‘84.

he was, instead, relieved. he saw how nancy looked at jonathan during their relationship, and steve did not want nancy to be in a ‘bullshit relationship,’ as she put it. it was for the best.

nancy’s words were, however, cruel. his faux sadness turned authentic after she had called him bullshit. his father had already thought much of him; steve didn’t want nancy thinking so of him too.

but it seems she did.

steve could feel tears welling up in his eyes again. he had to return his gaze to the ceiling that no longer spun, lest his tears drip down his bloodied cheeks. how much longer could steve hold robin off? he’s running out of excuses, fast. the teen couldn’t lie to her forever. however, steve doesn’t think he has a choice in the matter. he sighs, releasing a shaky breath. perhaps he’ll blame the drugs later.

“it was just bullshit anyway.”

“what do you mean?”

“i never loved nancy.”

“now, i think…you’re still high. everyone saw how you looked at nancy.”

steve knows that voice. if it wasn’t for her words, he could tell robin was calling him a liar just by her tone alone. he knew she wouldn’t believe him, for he had put too much effort into his masked act throughout high school. not a great start so far. he has to try a different approach.

“you know, those rumours weren’t true. the ones that girls had spread about me? you know which ones. nothing they said had really happened.”

he was a gentleman, not a ladies’ man. he held the door, helped a girl carry her stuff, all the things a kind and respectful teenage boy would do. he never flirt with girls, rather the other way around.

“but you were the talk of the school. ‘how great of a time steve harrington was.’”

“nope. still a virgin.” steve couldn’t tell what was worse: admitting he’s never had sex or hearing about how ‘amazing at sex’ he supposedly was. (those girls are setting themselves up for disappointment). this time, the answer seemed satisfying enough for robin, which he was glad for, and they returned to their comfortable silence from before.

but now, his thoughts began to plague his mind again.

how bothersome.

was he really going to tell her?

he looks to the wall that divides robin and him and sighs.

he could do this. the sooner, the better, right? and again, if all doesn’t go as planned, he’ll blame the drugs. if robin did suddenly hate him, he wouldn’t blame her. steve doesn’t really like himself, either. “hey, robs?” can he call her that? are nicknames okay? “yeah, stevie?” he guesses so, then.

the tears were welling up again, and there was no stopping them from falling this time. steve’s breathing was shaky, and he was sure robin could hear him sniffle.

if she did, she didn’t mention anything about it, thankfully. steve felt like his lips were being thread shut again. but he couldn’t risk being silent anymore. he had already gotten her attention.

“c-can i tell you a secret?” his voice wavered.

“depends,” there was a hint of humour in robin’s voice, “are you secretly…a serial killer?” steve laughed through his tears, sounding wetly, at her joke before wiping any strays away. she was trying to cheer him up, and well, it was working. “no! no, uh, promise you won’t tell?” robin laughed a little at first, but on a comforting, serious note, she whispered, “i pinkie promise.”

he sighs.

he was really going to do it.

“i don’t like girls, and i never have,” he paused, “robs…i like boys.”

then there was silence.

but that’s okay, steve thought. it was some pretty heavy news. maybe she’s just trying to process it! or maybe, she was rethinking her entire friendship with steve and would tell him to fuck off, maybe call him a slur – he didn’t know.

he was starting to freak out. worry began to creep back into steve’s mind the longer the silence lasted. he was going to cry again. he could feel the tears already building up and obscuring his vision.

“robin, did you just od over there?” he joked, parroting her words back to her. luckily, this time, his voice did not show his distress. there was some shuffling and then a sigh.

“no. i am still alive.”

maybe steve made a mistake. who would have thought; steve harrington is gay? no way. it’s a real shocker, really. but he can’t be himself, not like that one senior above him who he’s pretty sure never graduated this year, either, when his parents are too well-known in hawkins. if word were to get out that steve harrington is kissing boys, his father would have his ass disowned. or worse, he’d be found dead.

bile nervously makes its way up his throat, but he swallows his nerves.

slowly, he moves from his corner, careful of his aching body, and slides under to robin.

he was expecting some form of disgust when he saw her face again, but.

he was definitely not expecting to see her crying.

but despite her empathetic cries, she was smiling at him. "can i tell you a secret, steve?" his eyes softened, and he lowered his guards almost immediately. "yeah." she was happy for him, understanding even. "promise not to tell?" steve nodded, whispering out, "pinkie." she opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. robin thought over her words before reaching for his hand.

it was comforting, having the muscles there massaged soothingly so. robin smiled again, wetly, and her lip quivered a little. “robin?”

“you’re not alone. y’know?” steve softly gasped. he knew there were other kids out there just like him. but this was the first time someone had told steve he wasn’t alone.

especially by someone he cared about.

he remained silent, only to hold robin’s hand to return her support and comfort. it was her turn to talk, and robin took the opportunity. she could understand why steve felt so alone, though. she thought she herself was alone, like nobody would understand her. steve harrington was always so full of surprises, wasn’t he?

“do you remember what i said about click’s class? about me being jealous and, like, obsessed?”

“yeah.”

“and do you remember tammy thompson?”

“yeah?”

he remembered her a little bit. blonde, long curly hair, constantly chewed her gum too loudly, sang like a muppet giving birth? yeah, he remembered her. click’s class; he had to deal with her smacking in his ear all the damn time, and she was a total pain in his ass. he absolutely did not like her.

“it was because she wouldn’t stop staring at you. i wanted her to look at me. but she just couldn’t pull her eyes away from you and your stupid hair.”

steve was half-tempted to crack a joke about not insulting the hair, but at that moment, he could care less about the insult, too lost in robin’s story.

“and i wouldn’t understand.”

he almost asks 'understand what?' but she goes on. “i mean, come on. you always got bagel crumbs on the floor, you’d ask so many dumb questions, and you were a douchebag!” that stung a little, but she wasn’t saying it to be mean. it was true, and steve could never deny it. let’s face it: steve harrington was douchebag of the year.

“and the thing is, you didn’t even like her. i’d scream into my pillow every night because of it.”

was she?

“but…tammy thompson’s a girl?”

“steve.”

“yeah?” robin smiled at him, tears rolling down her cheeks as she cupped his hand. it was comforting. not just for him but for herself too. and then it clicked. she was! “oh.” he smiled, their faces now matching with old and new tear stains. “yeah, oh.”

steve was not alone, and neither was robin. they had someone to lean on and share secrets with; they had a best friend. and it was the best moment of their lives.

Just so we're all on the same page with the writer's strike.

If during the strike, it's announced about AI generated shows. We are not watching them. Not even out of curiosity. Let them fail every AI generated show they try make.

The human voice can not be replaced by AI. Don't let them try.

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do you think that after one of their dnd sessions mike ever stood there alone and then just impulsively took his and will's figurines and made them kiss. and then of course immediately dropped them like they burned him because what! what is he doing! and started pacing around the table to walk off whatever realisation the could have been. meanwhile will was in his room lying on the bed drawing art of their characters holding hands. kicking his legs