Have I told y’all about my husband’s Fork Theory?  If I did already, pretend I didn’t, I’m an old.

So the Spoon Theory is a fundamental metaphor used often in the chronic pain/chronic illness communities to explain to non-spoonies why life is harder for them. It’s super useful and we use that all the time. But it has a corollary.  You know the phrase, “Stick a fork in me, I’m done,” right? Well, Fork Theory is that one has a Fork Limit, that is, you can probably cope okay with one fork stuck in you, maybe two or three, but at some point you will lose your shit if one more fork happens.  A fork could range from being hungry or having to pee to getting a new bill or a new diagnosis of illness. There are lots of different sizes of forks, and volume vs. quantity means that the fork limit is not absolute. I might be able to deal with 20 tiny little escargot fork annoyances, such as a hangnail or slightly suboptimal pants, but not even one “you poked my trigger on purpose because you think it’s fun to see me melt down” pitchfork.

This is super relevant for neurodivergent folk. Like, you might be able to deal with your feet being cold or a tag, but not both. Hubby describes the situation as “It may seem weird that I just get up and leave the conversation to go to the bathroom, but you just dumped a new financial burden on me and I already had to pee, and going to the bathroom is the fork I can get rid of the fastest.”

I like this and also I like the low key point that you may be able to cope with bigger forks by finding little ones you can remove quickly. A combination of time, focus, and reduction to small stressors that can allow you to focus on the larger stressor in a constructive way.

!!!

I like this.

Would users of this theory be called forkies? 

-FemaleWarrior, She/They 

@instructor144 @spoiled-lil-kitten @fae-kisses @kink-for-tink @anyone else this would be relevant to

—  Mark Manson, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life

Interesting. Maybe even interesting enough to actually buy a new book. Hmmm...

Don’t forget that:

@haha-i-need-to-study

Moaw miOW mau- BRBRBRB

Why they yellin

Vaginas are powerful. Let’s be honest, women are basically walking around with an atomic bomb between their legs. And, with that kind of power, comes the ability to command absolute fear, respect, and devotion. Like Queen Njinga (a.k.a. “Nzinga”) of Angola did during her African reign in the 1600s. Her story begins during the height of the Portuguese slave trade: Shortly after the death of her father, King Kiluanji, in 1618, her brother took to the throne, but his lack of leadership skills quickly became apparent. So, he simply gave up. He committed suicide in 1626, allowing the Portuguese to essentially do whatever the fuck they wanted with the Angolan population. And, well, Njinga wasn’t about that life. She took control, assumed the throne, and began her retaliation against the Portuguese oppression. Her ruthlessly independent nature made her a brilliant military leader as she organized guerrilla armies to defend her people. Her independent spirit also meant that instead of finding a man to become the new king, she simply took on the role herself, requiring that she be referred to as “King” not “Queen.” And, like most kings did back then, she amassed herself a large harem: hundreds of male concubines kept around solely for her sexual pleasure. Now, you wouldn’t expect a woman of her status to let just any dude wet his willy with her — would you? Of course not. So, in order to find the right guy for the night, she’d choose two and watch them fight to the death. The winner earned the honor of her royal attention. Then, in order to prevent him from getting too clingy, she’d have him killed the following morning. (Damn, not even breakfast or coffee. Harsh.) The pattern continued for nearly 40 years; fighting the Portuguese by day, watching dudes fight to have sex with her by night. Her life was like one of those sexy, violent Rihanna music videos.

Well, you just learned some fucking history. You’re welcome. Now, remember, your vagina is kind of a big deal. I’m not saying you should make guys fight to the death for it, but you should definitely make them work a little. I don’t know, maybe something involving karate, or better yet: a fucking career. #SUNDAYSCHOOL https://www.instagram.com/p/ByNwGT3Be__/?igshid=hp34lfr3via0

No! Have you lost your senses completely?

Yes! Yes I have!!!

GREAT!?! Now that's all I can think of right now. LOL

look. i don’t think my stretch marks are beautiful. i don’t think they’re tiger stripes or natural tattooos. i don’t think my acne is beautiful. i don’t think the bags under my eyes are beautiful. i just think they’re human. and i don’t think i have to be beautiful all of the time in order to be accepted and loved and sucessful. i don’t think every small detail of my outer appearence needs to be translated into prettiness.

I’ve held the same opinion for so long. This is beautifully put

i am so fucking depressed it isn’t even funny - like dangerously depressed 

do you ever feel like your invisible walking through your own life ? 

I feel ya. Fucking sucks

Scorpio has to have at least one (1) flaw to keep them from ascending to godhood and leaving this mortal realm forever

Is THAT what's keeping me here?!?

The difference between intelligence and wisdom is that a intelligent person can solve problems but a wise person can avoid them

— Ariel Dorfman, Death and the Maiden

This is where I'm at in life.

Butterflies ♡

Yes he does 🔥😍

LOL yes!

you need to start believing that nothing is too good for you

Ok. Sounds easy enough. When do the drs get here to start the electroshock therapy to rewire my brain??? Oh. Oh, so, they're not coming? I have to do it all by myself? Suuuuure, sounds totally doable. Lol

Ready For The Weekend

Yes!!? Must make Bender grill!!!

Gmorning all and happy Friday……

Love it!

More fun Zodiac facts here

Don't know if I agree with this. Adventurous? Yes. Selfish??? Hmmm, maybe in small ways. But mostly I'm all about putting others needs/wants first. Shhhh, don't tell anyone I might be a secret softy. 😉

BILL NYE can’t stress the importance of Climate Change enough

Bill Nye the science guy: adult version

lol