Finally, a worthy foe for Plinko Horse
Taffy Puller Cow
reblog to taffy a cow
This is how they make beef jerky
vegans will tell you this is the process to make one (1) ham burger
vegans will tell you
this is the process to make
one (1) ham burger
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
reblog the money pigeon for a financially stable future
I reblog the money pigeon because I love him.
I reblog the money pigeon because its a dinosaur
Exactly something he would do if you ask me 🤷🏾
Something in Renfield 2023 that gets more and more funny to me is how all the characters are fully Aware Of Dracula, but it's not even like "he's a well-known fictional character that people don't believe is real", it's more like "we heard some wild shit about that guy being an immortal monster who eats people before." Multiple characters basically go "huh, THE Dracula? the ACTUAL Dracula?" and then immediately move on like
I understand why this wasn't used in the film (the serious Dracula manipulation is better) but god damn it's still funny.
Try telling me this wasn’t how that one conversation in Renfield went, I dare you 😤
He's goth. He's bisexual. He's a disaster. He's canonically a dilf. He's worked for Count Dracula (that one) for literal decades. He's part of a codependent relationship support group. He eats bugs. He makes snicker doodles. His studio apartment looks like it came out of a 70s tie dye event. He wears pastel square sweaters. He decapitated a man by punching him. He has self-help books lining the wall of his home. He cut off a guys arms with a cheap serving platter. He brought flowers to give a witness statement. He drugged and brought many people to their deaths. He doesn't like ska. He's covered in blood for half the movie. He even did coke. I didn't say his name but he popped into your head didn't he?
HOW HAVE WE NOT TALKED ABOUT THIS
this is probably the best take I’ve heard so far on the debate of people being told that they aren’t having enough ‘compassion’ for billionaires making bad decisions and paying the obvious consequences for it
“You’ve seen a lot of weird stuff today, traveler. Here are some cute ghostly kittens to restore your faith in the world. Now, tell us what is worrying you.” Webtoons
Even as a zelink shipper whenever people refer to Link and Zelda as soulmates it makes me laugh, cause yeah you're not wrong they totally are but Ganondorf is also technically their soulmate in that regard? The poly shippers have gotten around that issue but for everyone else he's literally born to third wheel. No wonder he's pissed, not only does he never get to realize his ambitions he's gotta watch that awkward teenage romance over and over for eternity. It's like he keeps scrolling past his NOTP and the block button isn't working. Bottling the princess just pisses off the other one, and the other one has the invincibility of a Nokia cell phone. What's a born hater to do
I love the internet. i'll have a unhinged thought then google it and be like ITS REAL.
every couple weeks I get a nextdoor update from someone saying they heard an explosion. I am absolutely positive that someone nearby has a really crappy car or something. Every time someone comments "I heard it too, pretty sure it was a car backfiring" and the erstwhile poster insists it was a huge boom that shook their house. Based on the absence of news coverage, every single time it is a car, or a firework, or someone dropping something heavy. It is never an explosion.
Set off actual explosives so that they now what one looks like and will stop confusing other loud noises for one
So I was going to say that I thought there WAS an explosion- a big news story a few years ago about a house that was booby trapped/filled with illegal explosives to the point that they decided the best thing to do was get as much explosive out of the house as possible and demolish the house entirely- that had all these people convinced this was something they should be vigilant for, because it played out while everyone was cooped up at home in late 2020 so everyone was EXTREMELY tuned in.
But trying to find that news story turned up a bunch of other exploding house stories in the past few years- mostly chemicals being mixed together that really shouldn't be or house fires that caught something like oxygen tanks- so maybe I'M the idiot! I mean, they are too because there DEFINITELY was not an explosion yesterday in the place they thought they heard one, and I have never received nextdoor alerts related to any ACTUAL explosions even though there are apparently a couple that would've been audible to some people in the area my nextdoor covers
so i guess that's a new anxiety we can all have
Fun fact I was in the "blast zone" that day. And by that I mean I was working at the Walmart near the house. Fun fact the police lost it and were like everyone out nowwwww an hour before my shift ended. But all the workers were talking about it all day (i got there at 7am). So it couldn't of been that bad. On a unrelated note that is not the only bomb threat I've dealt with at work.
AVENGE ME HAMLET FOR I WAS KILLED BY YOUR UNCLE, AND MY BROTHER
A MOST FOWL AND UNNATURAL MURDER
