I’m going to make you a sandwich.
This seems retarded, right?
See, to most guys, it’s usually the other way around.
But no. I’m not like that.
I want to prove to you that I’m not like the sexist guys out there in this world.
You don’t belong in a kitchen, because you belong in my heart.
Sincerely,
Me.
I need to stop getting on scottish twitter cuz i be wanting to laugh mad hard in class
pretty girl: *approaches me* me: *panics and draws my greatsword*
this is fake because the mike myers cat in the hat would not hesitate
when your friends are talking about stuff you don’t understand but you still want to be part of the conversation
this is like so funny but terrifying¿ im laughing partially out of fear
I’m laughing entirely out of fear
Crush: *Talks to someone*
Me: I lost them. They’re clearly in love with that person. How did this happen?
dO YOU EVEr SAY SOMETHING AS A JOKE AND IT ACCIDENTALLY HURTS SOMEONE’S FEELINGS AND YOU’RE JUST LIKE
shout out to water for keeping my throat sufficiently lubricated for optimal yodeling techniques
That literally got weirder and weirder with every word
When you go to someones house for the first time and you sit there like
can i get a love combo with a large friendship
