is prettyboy even an insult. everything you say after you call someone a prettyboy is immediately more homoerotic. like . hello

idk how anyone hates dean i get shown a man who has done the laundry for his family since he was like 7 and i have to love him sorry

like literally if you suffer from the disease that means you can imagine a gay little baby going to a launderette and folding his dad and his brother's clothes when the laundry bag weighs more than he does im sorry im sorry that your heart has turned to stone

he has selective mutism and he's gay and he can't keep up in school and he's doing his best to keep his baby brother fed and clean what is not clicking

Everytime I see posts like this I get filled with such profound sadness

Cause you know who has the same brainrot as you? The same unhinged feelings as you after you've read the fic? The person who always wants to scream about the fic with you?

THE PERSON WHO WROTE IT

I never used to leave comments but since I got into the habit of commenting on everything i enjoy it's been incredible. Especially when the author gets back to me about it and we get to have a discussion of what other ideas they had. One writer replied to my comment with a 5 paragraph essay detailing the Floorplan of the building the characters lived in and it was incredible

Anyways this is all to say that if you find a fic that just makes you want to scream from the rooftops, leave a comment saying that to the author and maybe they will join you and you can scream incoherently together

I cannot believe this happened to Robert Pattinson on the set of Twilight

I’M SCREAMING

what a time to be alive

I’m so confused and laughing so hard like

What?!??!!!

I’m actually laughing so fucking hard right now.

Read the article and it would seem the upset is because (minor spoilers) Bruce Wayne adopts Dick Grayson and then Dick finds out that the Batcave is beneath Wayne Manor and comments “Wow! Batman lives in Bruce Wayne’s basement!” (Or something to that affect) and then later when Batman asks Dick to come with him in the batmobile Dick is worried about leaving without “asking his Dad, Bruce Wayne” so Batman tells him that Bruce Wayne and Batman have joint custody of him so it’s ok. And Dick Grayson, an orphan who until recently didn’t have one dad, is overjoyed to find out that he now has two!

People are offended because Batman is in a gay relationship with himself I’m dying

LeGoBaTman

The best cover for Bruce Wayne would be dumb carefree playboy who is also Instagram Optimistic, everyday he’s posting a selfie of his smiling at his breakfast with a caption like “it’s a waffle day! #goodvibesingotham #grateful” or a picture of a sunrise with a caption that’s just “wow #blessed” 

Bruce Wayne ending up as Gotham’s favoured son because he may be an idiot, but he’s a cheerful idiot, and he donates tons to charity and genuinely loves Gotham and actually, truthfully does put a lot back into the city. And his instagram is a bright ray of sunshine, and honestly there are a lot of people in the city who get surprisingly defensive of their Dumb Carefree Playboy because, okay, sure, every month or so Bruce Wayne falls off a yacht or sleeps with a reporter or whatever. The man clearly never met a healthy coping skill even once in his life.

But as far as news regarding Gotham’s prominent citizens go, Bruce’s ‘scandals’ are so normal that it’s downright refreshing. When a headline has ‘Bruce Wayne’ in the title, you know you’re either going to read some Celebrity Gossip level non-drama, or else something to do with a charity. Maybe he’s been kidnapped again, but that’s only happened a few times. Bruce Wayne news is like the Gotham equivalent to special reports about dogs who rescue their owners from drowning, or raccoons who’ve figured out how to get past the new self-locking garbage can lids.

And there’s something weirdly reassuring about following his twitter. Like, if Bruce Wayne is tweeting about a really neat old tree he just saw, things must at least be sort of alright.

(Meanwhile, Bruce’s social media persona is 100% him flanderizing Clark.)

why does anyone in Gotham even bother doing crime like you KNOW the second you leave the bank with the money you just stole Bruce Wayne is gonna be chilling on a bench on the other side of the street in his bat fursuit like “hey bitch u better not be breaking the law”

because batman never bothered attacking the roots of social problems

you know what… you’re right call him out!!

Wayne Enterprises has a jobs program for those who are fresh out of prison. He routinely takes major villains with mental health issues to an asylum where professionals are there to help. Or do you just read the fight scenes?

Because

Batman

Never

Bothered

Attacking

The

Roots

Of

Social

Problems

WHAT THE HELL KIND OF BATMAN HAVE YOU BEEN WATCHING?

Fake geeks, I swear to god…

The best part is that most of the lore, especially Batman: The Animated Series, gets to a point in Batman’s career when everyone asks the question of why someone would rob a bank in Gotham when they know that if they approached Batman, and coincidentally Bruce Wayne, they could get the help they needed.

That’s the whole point of Batman. Granted there have been modernized adaptations that paint him out to be nothing more than a growling, punching, antihero. But nobody ever said those adaptations were canon or even good. The original Batman comics, most of the newer comics, the Animated Series, the animated spinoffs, even the Arkham video games all operate under the lore that Batman does everything within his power to help as many villains as he can, even if it means going against cops, politicians, etc. That’s what originally made him the vigilante. He went against the social norms. He did everything that a hero shouldn’t do, not in a murderous way, but in a taking-sides way. Every other hero swoops in to save the corrupt politician from the criminal. Batman swoops in to save the criminal from the corrupt politician. 

This is what pisses me off about ‘grim-dark’ versions of batman. Like Bruce is a giant teddy bear that cares so much it hurts him and he has the power to do the right thing and he does. That’s the Wayne Family influence.

bruce wayne maintains a presence on all conspiracy theory boards with the screen name BruceWayneIsTheBatman and all his posts have titles like “BRUCE WAINE IS BAT-MAN INDISPUTABLE PROOF” and it’s just a picture of Bruce Wayne from the back next to a picture of Batman from behind and they both have the contours of their butt drawn on in a shitty MSPaint red line (note: Bruce is in a suit and Batman has a cape, neither of their butts are clearly discernible) and the quote “THE BUTTS MATCH!!! THE FACTS DON’T LIE!!!!!” and he makes at least three of these posts a day, and “Bruce Wayne is the Batman” becomes a meme a la “Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer” and he gets asked about it on a talk show and he laughs uproariously at the idea and Stephen Colbert just HAPPENS to have a batman mask under the desk and they do a bit together where Bruce Wayne puts on the mask and walks around saying things like “excuse me, bank robbers, can I perhaps offer you some money to stop you robbing this bank?” and “I say, cease and desist your criminal behavior or I’ll have my butler ask you to leave” and the audience is LOSING THEIR MINDS laughing at the idea of this pampered rich guy taking on the Joker on a bi-weekly basis and then anyone who suggests “Bruce Wayne is Batman” in earnest gets met with mocking “oh man do the butts match” comments

why is robert pattinson like this

He’s perfect for the role

can’t stop thinking about that interview where the guy is like “what’s your favourite chick flick?” and robert pattinson goes “chicken run”

listen idk I’m thinking about how before new moon came out it was like….every single news story was debating on whether or not they should keep taylor lautner as Jacob, because he wasn’t buff enough, and the film studio and the general public essentially pressured him into doing insane diets and workout routines just so he can keep a role he already won, just because no one would even entertain the character looking slightly different than described, and it was treated as this great thing, like damn, he really pulled it off!!! he’s hot now!!! he can keep the part!!! and that’s just so fucked up like. he was fucking 15 years old??? they spray painted abs onto Robert Pattinson in the same film. Taylor Lautner was LITERALLY A FIFTEEN YEAR OLD and practically the entire world slammed him for not having an unreal body, and then once he obtained one grown ass women were drooling over him like a piece of meat for the rest of his teenage years. what the fuck. 

I’m still on this! Imagine you’re still going thru puberty and the world is so obsessed with your body that you become a sex symbol for MOTHERS. first all the focus on whether or not he could get the body and then constant focus on what it looks like for the next 4 or 5 years like! That’s so fucked up he didn’t NEED an 8-pack THEY SPRAY PAINTED ABS ON ROB IN THE SAME MOVIE

he did interviews on all his crazy work out routines and said he had to carry around beef patties and other high protein foods wherever he went so he was just eating constantly THATS NOT ALRIGHT and every single magazine article or ET news segment was covering this the whole time. Fans were vocally debating whether he deserved to keep the role that HE ALREADY EARNED. This was such a big deal. What the fuck.

so the highest paid teenager was also the second sexist man of the year, huh

*Racialized pedophilia

I am not a Twilight fan, nor am I a fan of Taylor Lautner, but damn this is wrong to do to anyone and I will fight anyone who tries to defend doing this to a teenager.

i am shook to my goddamn CORE. THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE

peak LGBT ally is robert pattinson and taylor lautner kissing each other so that kristen stewart didn’t have to be straight live on TV

Robert Pattinson's commentary in Twilight is hilarious

i think this pretty much sums it up.

i could go more in depth, but i'm not going to

I had some additions