The voice in your head knows all your secrets
Ultron was on the internet for 5 minutes and decided all of humanity needed to go.
Cats are always upset because they're nature's perfect killing machines, but humans keep picking them up and saying how cute they are.
Somewhere in the world someone is known in their friend group as the guy who took a pornstars virginity.
Some wolf once decided to be friendly with some weird apes and that turned out to be maybe the wisest survival play in all Evolution
The argument "Would you have liked to be aborted" Anti-Aborters use is losing it's purpose with the millenials and their inherent desire of dying
"Thicc" is actually the most accurate slang term because the "cc" resembles the booty
Kids who wouldn’t let you borrow a pencils in class grow up to not let you merge on the highway
If James Hetfield officiated Kermit and Ms. Piggy's wedding... he'd be the Pastor of Muppets....
