I can have a little cry on the bathroom floor...as a treat

*Borat Voice*

Gerard Way Accidentally Stabs You In A NJ Parking Lot And Has To Call An Ambulance While "All I Want for Christmas" by Mariah Carey Plays In The Background [ASMR]

forgive me father for i have sinned in all the most intricate, exquisite and aesthetically pleasing ways i was capable of

i think i relate to the victorian gothic genre so heavily because i too am a sickly little bitch with a disturbing passion for the morbid and grotesque

older siblings b like i hate u because mom made me do things before u were born and also because u are taller. younger siblings b like u are oppressing me by giving me a task. only children b like what the fuck is compromise, fuck you

middle children b like [disappear under mysterious circumstances]

happy bday to niall, and to my favorite twitter interaction of all time

a very sexy thing:

when the subtitles tells you the name of the song that’s playing 

megachurch pastors: i will see you all in heaven!

God:

Woah your an "audiophile"? You listen to music? That's crazy.

I hate music. I also hate to travel. I like to sit in the same silent room.

the only valid m/f pairing dynamics are:

none of these are mutually exclusive

for the visual learners in the crowd

If I may add:

@god-sent-gender-bent

Every Spider-Man villian fourty five seconds into a heist.

not to be emo on main but mcr was right when they portrayed a capitalist hellscape where basic human emotion is commodified and sold.

nooooooooo dont buy st ives apricot scrub youre so sexy aha

having love in your heart will literally save you from the otherwise cataclysmic experience of being a human being

i know what i said u pessimistic bastards and i stand by it!!!!

Itd be funny as fuck if the world operated like how people with social anxiety think it does. Like what if you got on a bus and everyone was like wow look at that piece of shit loser. Get off the bus you ugly bastard

the youtube algorithm finally gets it

This body is a vessel for my mayhem and as long as I can perform bafoonery it doesn’t matter if this stomach is flat or not

Still find it weird that hating billionaires is not a more universal feeling.

It shouldn’t matter if you are a leftist or right wing, how do you look at people hoarding billions of dollars and think “oh, this is actually good. I’m sure they earned that fair and square. They will make good usage of it”