PSA: Erotic hypnosis is not about orgasms
Hypnosis is not about orgasms.
Kink is not about orgasms.
For fuck’s sake, sex is not about orgasms!
Can we all stop obsessing about orgasms for one fucking second?
Isn’t kink about intimacy? About forging a connection with another person, exploring their body and their mind?
Isn’t kink about playing? About toying and being toyed with? About teasing and letting go of the tedious social rules that constrain us in daily life? Rules like: you shouldn’t hurt or scare someone, you shouldn’t be so rough, so domineering. You shouldn’t use dirty language, you shouldn’t scream, you shouldn’t wrestle, you shouldn’t make a scene. Hmm, is that why we call it a scene?
Look, certain things are about orgasms. Or chastity, which is the absence of orgasms, I guess. And these things are certainly kinky and they belong here in the kink community. My partners know I love me some of that. I have nothing against orgasms.
But as a kinky hypnotist, I just want you, the people who want to know more about kinky hypnosis, to know that there is so much more to hypnosis than orgasms. Certainly, a hands free orgasm is a very interesting sensation and an achievement that you can cross off your bucket list. And making your partner cum on command is a fun and interesting activity that can serve all kinds of kinky purposes. But there is so much more!
I’m a particular fan of hypnotic bondage. My definition of hypnotic bondage is: using hypnosis to physically restrain someone and make them unable to move in some way. You can make their body limp and useless, or rigid and frozen, or held by invisible bonds, or just stuck with glue. You can make that as painful or as comfortable as you like.
Hypnosis is beautiful for mind games. How long have you been tied up inside that closet? Why can’t you stop masturbating, isn’t that inappropriate and embarrassing? Can you remember your name? Oh, your name is fuckslut? You’re usually such an intelligent conversationalist, why can’t you make a full sentence now? Do you remember who I am? Are you afraid of me? Why aren’t you strong enough to fight me all of a sudden? So many mindfucky things are possible.
And as a hypnofetishist, I also want to say: hypnosis is beautiful in and of itself. The body language and facial expression of someone who is falling into trance is exquisite. The vivid daydreams we can have while hypnotised are such a gift. I have one partner who I always hypnotise into visiting places from fantasy stories, and I have a partner who hypnotises me into sensations of floating like an autumn leaf or a cloud. Recently, I had a scene with someone who just tenderly dropped me into trance and caught me safely in his hands, over and over, and it was amazing.
There is so much fun to be had when we’re not focused on orgasms. Some people will have orgasms while we’re having fun like this, and those orgasms are welcome and wonderful. But other people, like me, will be glad that there is no pressure to perform an orgasm, that it’s not a race to a finish line, that the scene isn’t a failure if no orgasm happens or if it happens too soon. Because that is not the point of the scene. The point is the intimacy we have together.