Ding!

Archangels Gabriel and Michael sat glowering at the nearby hovering screen. It was emitting chimes practically nonstop.

13:24:45: [Aziraphale] Moved one (1) plastic cup to trash bin. 13:24:47: [Aziraphale] Moved one (1) cigarette butt to trash bin. 13:24:48: [Aziraphale] Moved one (1) plastic straw to trash bin. 13:24:49: [Aziraphale] Moved one (1) styrofoam container to trash bin. 13:24:52: [Aziraphale] Moved one (1) left sock to trash bin.

“Why doesn’t he just miracle all of them in at once?” Michael asked in frustration.

“You damn well know why,” Gabriel muttered. Ever since that horrifying day that Aziraphale stood in a column of demonfire and then belched out a gout of it at them, it seemed that he was going out of his way to just piss off the management with incessant spam.

Gabriel sighed in relief when he saw that the onslaught of messages stopped for a bit. “Anyway. I was thinking that if we do want to arrange for the Big One™, we might want to–”

Ding!

13:25:49: [Aziraphale] Removed one (1) Swastika graffiti.

Michael glanced at the screen. Then she shrugged and shared a nod with Gabriel. “Fair.”

“… we might want to have you get a few more ‘contacts’ in low places, if you know what I mean,” Gabriel continued.

Michael took a breath to respond.

Ding!

13:25:58: [Aziraphale] Applied one (1) graffiti reading ‘Gabriel <3 Beelzebub.’

Michael stared at Gabriel, her eyebrows twitching up questioningly.

Gabriel shifted uncomfortably in his chair, “… well, now he’s just being petty. Come on, Aziraphale.”

Michael decided to ignore it and move on, “I may be able to make some arrangements. Even if the holy water didn’t work out as planned, the exchange was still marked as satisfactory…”

Ding!

13:26:15: [Aziraphale] Applied one (1) graffiti reading ‘Gabriel = Gross Matter.’

The two archangels scowled at the readout. “Something needs to be done about him,” Michael said.

Gabriel raised his eyebrows in a doubtful look. “Soooo… you saying you wanna be the one to confront him about it?”

Michael sat quietly for a moment, glancing aside nervously as she recalled the image of Aziraphale’s gleeful, hellfire-engulfed features.

“… on second thought, we have better things to do,” she murmured.

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! …

13:26:49: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. 13:26:50: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. 13:26:51: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. 13:26:52: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. 13:26:53: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. 13:26:54: [Aziraphale] Created one (1) grain of rice. …

In Hell, they’re dealing with a new set of irritating readouts. Beelzebub is ready to resort to banging their head on their own throne.

13:31:40: [Crowley] littered (1) gum wrapper

13:31:58: [Crowley] littered (1) gum wrapper 

13:32:04: [Crowley] littered (1) gum wrapper 

13:32:47: [Crowley] littered (1) gum wrapper…

meanwhile in Heaven:

13:31:42: [Aziraphale] cleaned up (1) gum wrapper

13:32:00: [Aziraphale] cleaned up (1) gum wrapper 

13:32:30: [Aziraphale] cleaned up (1) gum wrapper 

13:32: 58: [Aziraphale] cleaned up (1) gum wrapper…

Meanwhile Aziraphale and Crowley are just sitting next to each other on a bench in St. James Park, with Crowley just tossing wrapper after wrapper at the ground, Aziraphale cleaning them up, and neither of them have stopped laughing for the last ten minutes.

Plot twist: there’s only one gum wrapper, they’re just passing it back and forth.

Our trailer for Good Omens Season 2 has just been released. It is moderately entertaining and may help pass a couple of otherwise uneventful minutes.

"Credit to the original artist" is not credit to the original artist

"Payment to the cashier", I say, as I haul a TV out the door of the Walmart

Here you go. The Good Omens S2 Episode 1 title sequence, by Peter Anderson Studios, music by David Arnold. We warned you it was madder than the S1 titles, and it is. I think it's really good.

The Good Omeens Card Game is coming out June 5! 🥳❤

Renegade Game Studios will release Good Omens: An Ineffable Game June 5th, charging players with stopping the apocalypse in seven different battle games, each of which you can learn as you play, all in one box! Each of the seven cooperative battle games sees players taking on a different challenge, and each can be played at varying difficulties! 

“We’re thrilled to be collaborating with Amazon Studios to bring fans a Good Omens game” said Scott Gaeta, President of Renegade Game Studios, “Being a huge fan myself, it was important that we capture the spirit of the show and I think that designer, Matt Hyra, came up with something fans will really enjoy.” 

In Good Omens: An Ineffable Game players will call upon characters, both much-loved and deeply-loathed, in order to defeat the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Fight Heaven, Vanquish Hell, and even prevent Armageddon. The battle games are easy to learn but pack a challenge for any group, and each is themed around the confrontations that take place at the conclusion of Good Omens Season 1. 

Fans can catch up on the first season of Good Omens now streaming on Prime Video ahead of the second season premiering July 28th. The series is co-created by Neil Gaiman and is based on the well-loved and internationally best-selling novel by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman.

“Good Omens: An Ineffable Game promises to bring the world of Good Omens to life in an exciting new way” said Jamie Kampel, Head of Licensing & Merchandising for Amazon Studios, “We are thrilled to be creating this game in collaboration with a well-known board game publisher like Renegade, who is passionate about the property and has adeptly captured the tone and details of the series in a way that will delight fans.” 

Renegade will be producing three versions of Good Omens: An Ineffable Game, each with their own unique box art and bonus items, but all feature the same great gameplay! The Amazon exclusive version will include 12 foil versions of the character cards in the game. The Barnes & Noble exclusive version includes a Heaven & Hell-themed black and silver embroidered Good Omens dice bag, while the Hobby Market exclusive includes an Agnes Nutter Book of Prophecies-themed dice bag, in a luxurious green with gold embroidery. 

Good Omens: An Ineffable Game will be available wherever games are sold and have a suggested retail price of $25. 

GOOD OMENS PARODY IS HERE!

The Hillywood Show® brings you a Nice & Accurate Good Omens Parody filled with ineffable surprises! Can we get a wahoo? 

Featuring fan favorite moments, screen accurate costume/sets and surprise cameos (NEIL GAIMAN, DANIEL MAYS, MAGGIE SERVICE and even, the screen-used Bentley from S1), this parody, based on the best-selling novel by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, brings about the excitement of Amazon Prime Video’s Good Omens Season 2!

Excited to have been a part of this glorious reveal! Good Omens Season 2 arrives July 28th on Prime Video. Everyday, it’s a-getting closer…♫

Ooooh! Contains Neil Gaiman, Daniel Mays and Maggie Service! :D

And on the 10th of May, we were given a date for season 2, and it is ineffably good. Good Omens returns July 28th on Prime Video

y'know, one thing i don't see get talked about much in regards to asexuality is how it feels to never be 'sexually motivated' by anything

and not just when it comes to advertisements using 'sexy' models to try and sell you stuff, but like. in general

sex as a favor, sex as a bribe, sex in exchange for whatever

casual sex, 'friends with benefits' situations, even simple flirting

it all looks a whole lot different from the perspective of someone who's immune to manipulation via sex appeal, who has virtually no understanding as to why sex would motivate someone to cheat on their partner, etc. etc.

sex is worthless to me

i mean, it's useful as a story element in fiction, but it genuinely perplexes me that sex is such a driving force behind so many aspects of irl society & of people's individual lives, for better or for worse

and that it's so deeply ingrained into how the average person views the world & various situations, because the average person feels sexual attraction, whereas i do not

i think the barrier between aces & allos is actually even deeper than it seems on the surface at times, because it's more than just the grating expectation that everyone must want to 'settle down' and have kids, it's also the fact that the majority of the world is sort of 'in' on a joke that aces will never truly be a part of

Posts that validate my identity

Sex as a form of intimacy? Understand. Intimacy as enjoyable? Understand. Intimacy as vital? Understand. Sex as vital? Does not compute

Due to a high demand of people who wanted Fright Knight to have one too… and Littol Bean wants to share her new talent.

if you rb, put your answer in the tags as well as whether or not you're a writer yourself

Glaze is out!

Tired of having your artwork used for AI training but find watermarks dismaying and ineffective?

Well check this out! Software that makes your Art look messed up to training AIs and unusable in a data set but nearly unchanged to human eyes.

I just learned about this. It's in Beta. Please read all the information before using.

Art thieves already hate it:

Dude, if you're stealing, you deserve to have the data poisoned. Because you could have asked and you didn't.

The link is only in the original post inside an image, not as text, so here it is as plain text: https://glaze.cs.uchicago.edu/ and the paper about how it works: https://arxiv.org/abs/2302.04222

As links (because some of us are on mobile and can't easily copy and paste to our browser), those are:

https://glaze.cs.uchicago.edu

&

A bit of a TLDR for some questions I saw in the notes:

The team that created Glaze is from the University of Chicago. Their names are each listed in full on the Glaze download website. (This group of students/professors did this for their SPRING BREAK 😱 so go give them some love lol)

It is free to download. No, they won’t ask for or raise money from/for this project.(stated by one of the lead professors of the project).

Glaze is designed to protect artists’ STYLE--which a bunch of ai people have been deliberately fine-tuning their models to mimic (and specifically of current living artists--small or big).

It currently does not protect against composition/trace-like theft (as seen when run through img-to-img) but that would be protected by copyright anyway while STYLE is not.

The University Team has stated that they are dedicated to continuing to improve the tool, like fixing bugs (like overheating older computers by taking up lots of energy when Glazing--it currently runs on CPU so they’re trying to change that to GPU, I believe) and expanding the type of protection given to artists (like working against img-to-img theft).

It currently only works directly on your computer (phones not advised due to current overheating issue, no tablets, or iPads, and no website runthrough since that would be insecure to breaches/scraping/hacks)

It currently works best on painterly artwork, but can still be used on other forms (team is working on improving this)

IT WORKS BY calculating the changes each image needs for the best protection against style theft by AI, and adds tiny changes throughout the piece, so that your style will, for example, confuse the ai into seeing van gogh. But the ai thieves will see a regular image in your style, feeding it into their model labeled as your work (thus starting the “data poisoning”).

Do not post the original unGlazed piece of your artwork after posting your Glazed version (obviously)

The Team worked directly with over 1,000 artists that were being impacted by the ai theft. Because the team listened to those artists, Glaze accounts for regular art thieves too (i.e. Glaze can’t be removed/cropped etc. like signatures or watermarks when reposted. It’s just part of the image, so even if it ends up on another site and scraped, the Glazing is still in effect)

When you run your artwork through Glaze, no information is sent back to the Team. (Aka, no scraping on their part. The app receives information from the Team (like updates) but no information from you is given to them through the app. Basically Team servers ---> You and NOT Team servers <--->You) One-way data street.

Brief misunderstanding happened over an open-source license for the front-end part of the app. (Used open-source coding for front-end, not knowing that code’s use-license states it is only for other open-source uses, not closed-source (the back-end code of the app is private to prevent counter-counter measure developments)). The Team took down the app until they replaced the front-end code with code written from scratch by the team. They are now not in violation of that open-source license since they are no longer using it. (you have 30 days to remedy a license breach once informed; they did so in 2)

The Team is currently in touch with Japanese artists to better expand the tool for use to protect their art styles

From what I understand of it, Glaze is an AI tool designed to be anti-AI (Think Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator 2: one Terminator robot vs. all the other Terminators 😂)

You can download it from their website and also contact them through email there with any questions, problems, or bugs. The website: https://glaze.cs.uchicago.edu/

“If someone is going to kill me over this fic, just please let it be Deathstroke.”

“Okay so hypothetically I work at Wayne Enterprises and the big boss man (the boss) maybe ships Superbat???? And saw me updating during my break?????? And asked how he could find it????????? Also rip, Mr. Timothy Drake Wayne Jr the Third, but your dad is one of us now and no upwards looking pleas are going to stop him.”

“My neighbor just gave me a thirty minute lecture on multiversal theory and I will now be incorporating that knowledge into my next fic in the most cursed way possible. And, I mean, the guy knows a crazy ton about the Justice League? But also, like, whose favorite gotham hero is Red Robin lmao?”

“Me: *scours the web for fic research purposes*

The mr. Batman on my computer: is_this_a_pigeon_batman_rogue_meme.jpg

[Alt text: is this a pigeon meme showing man with Batman mask over face holding up a sign that says nightwingsbabe. Text across bottom reads: is this a rogue?]”

“This fic is dedicated to that one time I saw Red Hood trip off a rooftop and Spolier laughing at it for twenty minutes. You are my new ship.”

“Just saw the newest episode of the Mandolorian and will now be shamelessly inserting Red Hood into the Star Wars universe. No I’m not projecting what are you talking about. Anyway, only love for papa hood here. Everyone else go die in metropolis or something idk.”

“Black Bat is the coolest bat. That has nothing to do with this fic I’ve just been hearing a lot of VERY WRONG opinions lately and needed to come set the record straight.”

“I’m not in a cult, I promise.”

“I’m from Gotham. You’ve been warned. Read the damn tags.”

“Major character death is the Joker. Because this is gotham and that’s the escapist fantasy we all engage in here.”

"look I tagged this fic with both Dead Dove: Do Not Eat AND author is from Gotham so you don't get to freak out about the gratuitous violence when you were explicitly warned that it was gonna get graphic"

"well I'm posting early but this hasn't been beta'd because my beta is currently detoxing after the last Scarecrow attack, so please be kind. And also maybe leave a kind word in the comments that I can share with my beta? They need it."

"sorry not an update just a note to let everyone know that this fic will be going on hiatus until the latest Arkham breakout is resolved - I'm okay, it's just that Gotham is going into a mandated blackout. You know how it is."

“Sorry I didn’t update I just got out of blackgate.”

“I’ve written so much about red hood that good keeps autocorrecting to hood. I’m completely normal about him I swear.”

“Two Face attacked the office last week and poor Mr Wayne was missing like the entire time. Can someone get that guy a bodyguard? And like, a therapist or something? Anyway, I’m home from the hospital now with plenty of time to write. Expect all the updates.”

“I got a disappointed dad sigh from nightwing. That has nothing to do with this I just wanted to share my emotional pain.”

“soooooo uh apparently being an insomniac writer with poor impulse control in Gotham has some benefits??? I was hanging out on my fire escape with my laptop and uhhhh well i probably shouldn’t give too many details bc i dont wanna dox myself but uh. everyone say thank you to Red Hood for fucking???? Beta’ing this oneshot????? I know it sounds fake, trust me, I was THERE and it still sounds fake to me”

“you aren’t allowed to @ me for the “wrote this during a joker gas attack” tag unless you have lived a minimum of 6 years in gotham okay. you don’t GET it.”

“so if some of the dialogue sounds familiar its because you might’ve heard it on the news recently during the last Riddler uh.... thing. and its NOT in bad taste okay, no one died this time”

“i wanna thank everyone for all the sympathy after the last chapter, when i mentioned in my authors note that my brother had been murdered, it really meant a lot!!! but he’s back now so it’s all gucci :peace_sign:”

“This one is for the Signal. You’re insane and I love you so much.”

“How come Robin gets a sword and I don’t? He’s like ten. Anyway, have a fic with a ton of swords because someone won’t let me get one.”

“Genuinely laughing my ass off at the comment from the last chapter. I know exactly who is from Gotham and who isn’t and I love you my fellow hell-dwellers.”

“Guys this fic ended up being set in Metropolis I’m so sorry.”

“No beta we die like Gothamites on Tuesdays”

“Does it count as RPF if it’s the anthropomorphism of the bat signal and the batmobile? Asking for a friend.”

“fun fact! if you write commissioner gordon/batman smut, it gets mysteriously deleted from your profile within 3 minutes of being posted, and you get a terrifying email from Oracle that I don’t dare to repeat here! Anyways, enjoy this re-written smut, now featuring Batman and Green Arrow instead. Since I guess Oracle is watching me which is TERRIFYING.”

“new rule: you can’t complain about anyone writing Red Hood like a massive fucking nerd unless you, personally, have heard him quoting Jane Austen while chasing a bunch of muggers down your street.”

“this one goes out to Spoiler, for no particular reason other than I still remember that time I looked out my window and saw her hit Robin in the head with a fucking brick on the next roof over”

“no beta we die like joker goons”

“to the commenter who proposed marriage to me after the last chapter: i’m flattered, but i’m saving myself for Batgirl. If you ARE Batgirl, hmu babe <3″

“I think the guy next door works for Red Hood but like, that’s cool, right? They’re fine? Anyway, he knew so much about guns and fighting and stuff so have an actually well-written fight scene for once.”

“Writing from the hospital. Again. Can’t believe I got caught in the middle of a gang war again but I did get to see Red Hood shoot Black Mask and it made my whole year so honestly worth it.”

“No beta we die like Robin’s patience with the goons who were apparently using swords wrong and yes it was glorious and I’m pretty sure Spoiler filmed the entire thing so someone ask nicely and maybe we can have that forever.”

"so this chapter has a lot of cool animal facts in it but I cannot take any credit for research - Damian Wayne visited the animal shelter I volunteer at and basically gave an impromptu lecture. It was cute! And I really enjoyed it, so uh... have Robin lecturing some henchmen about proper pet care, I guess lmao"

"Y'ALL the dead robins club is REAL, I heard Nightwing reference it while he and Red Robin were waiting for the cops to pick up the guys who were trying to kidnap me (I'm fine btw don't worry). Anyways. VINDICATION."

"I did such a deep dive into Gotham's legal system, and also the NJ legal system in general, that I maaaaaaay be going to law school after I finish my undergrad???? So. There are SOME benefits to being a Two-Face fucker. Maybe."

"not Flash stans in MY comment section :crying_laughing: get outta here. This is for Gotham gremlins only."

This is not my fandom. I don’t know who half these characters are.

And yet, I feel EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE deep in my soul. All of this is correct.

"Hey y'all the sunshine boi visited my school today and he just. radiates positivity. So have some Bruce Wayne fluff <3"

"Look I know it's unrealistic but I wanted to have fun and write an AU where Sunshine Bruce Wayne secretly is Batman. so Crack fic I guess."

AO3 Etiquette

It would seem a whole new kind of AO3 reader/writer is emerging and it is becoming clear not everyone quite understands how the website community works. Here is some basic guidance on how most people expect you to go about using AO3 to keep this a fun community archive that funtions correctly:

I KNOW there's plenty more I missed but I'm trying to cover most of the basics that people seem to be struggling with.

I invite anyone to add to this, but please explain, don't berate.

Good Omens Tarot Deck and Guidebook

Angels and demons guide your tarot practice in this officially licensed card deck and guidebook inspired by the Good Omens television series starring Michael Sheen and David Tennant. Fans of Good Omens can predict the future like Agnes Nutter with this official tarot deck. Featuring beautiful illustrations of iconic angels, demons, Witchfinders, Professional Descendants, and many more fan-favorite characters and artifacts from the celestial comedy, this ineffable tarot deck is a must-have for fans of the Amazon Prime Video show. Containing both Major and Minor Arcana, the set also comes with a comprehensive guidebook explaining each card’s meaning. Packaged in a sturdy, decorative gift box, this compelling tarot deck is perfect for fans of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s devilishly divine world and tarot enthusiasts alike. OFFICIALLY LICENSED TAROT DECK: Immerse yourself into the fantasy comedy series based on Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s popular novel of the same name, Good Omens, with this collectible deck created in partnership with the team behind the television series ORIGINAL ART: Predict your future with this 78-card deck and 128-page booklet featuring stunning original artwork of Aziraphale, Crowley, Gabriel, Beelzebub, and more characters from the hit Amazon Prime Video show GUIDEBOOK INCLUDED: This unique deck includes a comprehensive guidebook to help tarot practitioners of all skill levels perform fun and informed readings, complete with card meanings and instructions THOUGHTFUL GIFT: The Good Omens tarot deck and guidebook come packaged in a deluxe gift box, the perfect gift for fans of the television show and the original novel, as well as tarot enthusiasts everywhere

PRE-ORDER

 Example of the other artist’s work (instagram) ❤:

So...There's a scene in Good Omens where we need an extract from Aziraphale's Diary in the 1820s. And as we were about to shoot him writing it, Douglas asked if we could see a bit of the previous diary entry as well. So I wrote one. As it turned out, we are too close up to read anything of the previous diary extract and only the final line is visible, if that.

I hated to imagine it going to waste.

So here's a small Valentine's Day gift for any of you who need cheering up. You will need to imagine the rest of the story.

“Madam!” I said, “I do believe that you have entirely misunderstood me!”

The countess drew herself to her full height, which I believe would have been about five feet and seven inches, and stared at me, quite puzzled. “No,” she said, “I believe that it is you who are mistaken, Mr Fell. For never have I met a man of any kind who could resist my blandishments.” And then, replacing her garments (which took much longer than shedding them), she added, “I do not know what manner of a man you are, Mr Fell. I trust you will still help my brother with his little problem.”

“I am still there for him,” I assured her. “He is as good as freed from his durance vile.”

“You are an angel,” said the countess.

And so we left the matter. This morning, her brother rejoined her, released (by me) from debtor's gaol. She was by all acounts delighted to see him.

POSTSCRIPT:

It appears that she was not a countess, he was not her brother, and they fled together for France leaving many debts behind them. I told Crowley all about the matter over a glass of claret, but he did not appear to be as surprised as I had expected.

Ye gads. :)

the best part is that, like, this is not a home gym

one day itll be 2023 and everything will be good

you fucking liar

A card game based on the popular Prime Video series Good Omens is on the way. 

Last night, Renegade Game Studios announced that they were producing a Good Omens card game, with box art featuring Michael Sheen and David Tennant’s depictions of Aziraphale and Crowley. Details about the card game were scarce, but the game will have three different versions – one for hobby stores, one for Barnes & Nobles, and one for Amazon. Each version will have some cosmetic differences in addition to different card art. More details will likely be revealed soon, as the game is due out for release in May of this year.

Watch youtube video announcement here :).

More info here :)

Amazon Exlusive: 12 or 13 foil boarded cards (shinier version of Crowley and Aziraphale)

Barnes & Noble Exclusive: Heaven& Hell themed diced bag - black with silver etching, games logo

Hobby Store Exclusive: Angess Nutter themed bag - like the Book of Prophecies

- 7 card and dice games, each 20-30 minutes, easy to learn, all cooperative that recreate the events of Season 1 of Good Omens :)

WAHOO! :)

hey, don't cry. comet C/2022 E3 (ZTF) visible to us humans for the first time in 50,000 years before it'll leave us forever, ok?

[source] for all the images

some people are a little sad in the tags because they can't/couldn't see it, but that's ok!!! you looked at the sky and it is/was right there passing by to wish us farewell even if invisible to us!! we are/were connected to it in that moment, you don't have to have a visual to wish it a good journey 🧡

WERE ANY OF YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A PHYSICAL REACTION TO HOT PEOPLE??? LIKE HEARTRATE RISES AND ALL THAT. THAT’S REAL??

I’ve been dramatically exaggerating my reactions to hot people for YEARS because I thought that was what everyone did. For COMEDIC EFFECT. are you telling me all the squealing and people getting flustered and those ‘not to be a lesbian but oh my god’ tags were Not A Joke

At least dinosaurs. Are real

A small collection. Happy ace week you guys