my girlfriend is able to take like a 20-min nap and bounce back with full energy. idk how she does that. when i lie down i wake up 12 years later in a hospital bed i rip the IV out of my arm and stumble into the hallway the whole building is littered with bodies, i make my way back to my house but my wife and children are long gone
(voice of a man invariably alienated from the human experience): Hey guys
i wish i could take an ad by the neck and strangle it with my bear hands
the phrases "kill myself" "kill yourself" "let's kill ourselves" are sacred because brands cannot use them. holy in the literal sense
what are you even supposed to do when youre angry. cant scream at anyone cos im not a dick. cant break anything cos i paid money for that. cant rip my hair out cos i need it on my head. literally what now
i am in fact NOT being very brave about it and will whine and complain until i die. As is my right
whatever happens it’s so important that we’re funny about it. Above all else commit to the bit
