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Of Demons and Deities

@seasonofthelich

I'm just a guy from New England. I like cats and mushrooms. I sometimes make art.
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industrial-horror

Sketches of the moon from Galileo’s “Sidereus Nuncius,” a short treatise on Galileo’s early observations of the Moon, the stars, and the moons of Jupiter; it was the first scientific treatise based on observations made through a telescope.

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worldhistoryfacts

A 1913 ad for Dr. Pepper, which contains a strangely philosophical explanation of how the soft drink fits into the mysteries of life, the universe, and everything. Did you know that Dr. Pepper is “liquid sunlight” that builds up cells?

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3y3
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ymutate

“We meet ourselves time and again in a thousand disguises on the path of life.”

― Carl Jung

Artist: Leilani Bustamante

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puresanityy
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themacabrenbold

Golden Skull Ring, 18k gold with a carved agate skull surrounded by rose, diamonds and black enameling, with hallmarks for London 1852. There is an interior inscription on the ring: “James Dixon Obit 1852,” it memorializes James Dixon, a well-known English silversmith and founder of the family firm of James Dixon & Sons.

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orriculum
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bitchesgetriches
Anonymous asked:

I am 25 and I’d like to start a Roth IRA so it has plenty of time to mature, but I don’t actually know how to do that.

All the financial information resources I follow (at least the ones that aren’t just advertisements) keep explaining what an IRA is, which I think I basically understand by now, and why investing is so important, which I am already convinced of considering I’m 25 and stressed out that I still haven’t started a retirement fund. However, they don’t explain HOW to actually do that.

Do I show up at my normal bank where I have my checking account and ask to start one? Is this the type of thing you’re supposed to do online or find like an investment firm or something? Should I look for a local credit union? What documents do I need? Can I just transfer the money from my normal savings account, or does it need to come out of a paycheck somehow? Is there some sort of step by step set of instructions that isn’t sponsored content trying to sell me something?

I am convinced of the importance of investing, and I would like to have a Roth IRA based on an index fund that is mostly hands off. Now that I’ve decided that, how on earth do I go about actually creating it?

bitchesgetriches answered:

I think we need to write a whole ass article about this, because you're not the first to ask. It surprises me that brokerages and banks don't make this shit more obvious, since they profit on us starting accounts with them. Anyway, here is your step by step, my precious child:

HOW TO OPEN AN INVESTMENT ACCOUNT

1. Pick a bank or brokerage firm. There are lots. You don't have to be an existing customer. Do some googling for reviews. Personally, most of my money is invested through Vanguard, but I've heard good things about Fidelity, Ellevest, and others.

2. Go to their website and click "open an account." You can also just google "[bank name] + Roth IRA" or "open a Roth IRA with [bank name]" which should get you where you're going.

3. Choose the type of account you want. In this case, you want to open a Roth IRA. That's a solid choice to invest for your retirement. But you can also start a straight "brokerage account" for general investing that isn't tax-advantaged like an IRA or other retirement account.

4. Follow the instructions on the website. Every bank's web interface will be slightly different, but I'll walk through some of the basic steps below. Important: YOU CAN ALSO CALL. I know not everyone is comfortable on the phone, but if you get stuck online, you can call the bank (the number will be on the site) and say "I'm a newbie investor and I'm trying to open a Roth IRA but I'm confused. Can you help walk me through it?" They're literally paid to help you.

5. Choose how to fund the account. You can do this very easily by transferring money directly from another bank or account. So if you have $1k saved up in a savings account at your local bank, you just need to get the bank name, routing number, and account number and input that when prompted.

6. Allocate the funds. THIS STEP IS INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT. They're going to ask where exactly you want your money invested. If you don't make a decision here, your money will by default go to Money Market... which means it's just sitting there as cash, not investments. So you have to allocate it to an actual investment vehicle. For the normal human being, I strongly recommend an index fund. My favorite is VTSAX, which stands for Vanguard Total Stock Market Index Fund Admiral Shares. But anything with the word "index" in it should be fine. You'll be given a list of options, and you can do some googling to research each one.

7. Set up an automatic deposit. This is optional, but I recommend putting a little bit in every month. If you're going with a Roth IRA, you can deposit up to $6k annually.

8. Go have a snack. You've just started investing, you deserve a treat!

9. Check back in 3-4 months. The stock market is cyclical. It goes up and down depending on a whole bunch of factors. If you look at your balance on the daily, you'll go insane with worry. So check on your investments quarterly, or every 3-4 months. Or don't! You could just sit back and ignore them until you're retirement age! You definitely don't need to do more than deposit money regularly, and (see above) you can automate that shit.

I hope that helps, little turtledove! Here are a bunch of articles we've written to help explain some of the terms I explained above:

Investing Deathmatch: Traditional IRA vs. Roth IRA

Investing Deathmatch: Investing in the Stock Market vs. Just… Not

Do NOT Make This Disastrous Beginner Mistake With Your Retirement Funds

Dafuq Is a Retirement Plan and Why Do You Need One?

Another, super easy option for non-retirement investing is to open a micro-investing account. We recommend Acorns, and they're kind enough to sponsor us.

Start investing with Acorns

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biglawbear

God bless, this article is some good shit.

Here are some more tips, in no particular order:

  • It's never too late to start investing in an IRA! Don't freak out if you're 30 or 35 or even 40 and haven't been able to start investing yet. You have decades to build up your retirement. Yes, compound interest means that a few thousand dollars invested ten years earlier pays off huge. But it's okay if you're poor or a student and don't have anything to invest! Start anyway!
  • Look into Lifecycle funds! These funds automatically change your investment distribution over time without you having to decide for yourself. The concept is simple: it starts you off in investments that have higher risk but higher return, and then slowly starts changing your investments into safer assets with lower returns as you get closer to retirement. I have a Lifecycle fund that assumes I'll retire in 2050. Almost the entire thing is in the stock market right now, which can give me high returns but also is more sensitive to market downturns. But in, say, 2049, almost the entire portfolio will be in bonds and government treasuries which have small returns, but it means I won't lose much or anything if there's a crash right as I retire. It's safe and easy and makes a lot of hard decisions for you! I believe Vanguard has these.
  • Consider splitting your investments between a traditional IRA and a Roth IRA. A traditional IRA is tax deferred. Meaning you don't pay the income tax until you draw on it until retirement. This can help you now if you don't have much money cuz it reduces your current tax burden, but your retirement is taxed when you draw later. A Roth IRA, you pay the tax now, but keep more when you draw in retirement. You don't have to pick one or the other! You can invest in both!
  • And finally... DON'T TOUCH YOUR RETIREMENT ACCOUNT. DON'T THINK ABOUT IT. DON'T EVEN LOOK AT IT! It's tempting to get nervous when the market crashes and you see your account go down. But over the course of decades, it will go back up. The market smoothes out over time, especially if you keep investing when it's a good market and when the market is a bear. The best investment strategy is long term!! Trying to "time" the market by reacting when it goes up or down is a bad strategy. Just invest consistently and check on it a couple times a year!
  • One more bit: withdrawing from your retirement account before you retire is taxed and penalized and is almost always a bad, costly idea. However, there are two instances when taxes and penalties don't apply: when you withdraw or take out a loan against your account for a medical emergency or to purchase a primary residence.

Happy investing!