zorte

Alien learns about Sign Language

[I saw some obvious errors and other confusing stuff and here is a better version]

Zort loved to learn about humans and has read many stories about humans, including about humans and body language https://humans-are-seriously-weird.tumblr.com/post/159843811389/humans-are-space-orcs-with-pack-bonding-and

Zort has been studying human for years and finally gets to meet many humans at a human held conference about alien relationships.

Zort is excited, he learned of things like the “shrugs,” “smiles,” and even “glances.” So he can understand human better at the conference or as the human call it “Con.”

At the first day of the “Con,” Zort going to meet up with his designated liaison “Susan,” to start the day.

At the first panel on “Foods most species can consume.” Zort see a person standing to the side of the table at the front. As the people speak, that person make many hand motions.
Zort doesn’t understand this body language. He know of several uses of hands to communication, but this goes far beyond that. The person hand and arms move around a lot and touch their head and make motions around their head and chest and out. Zort was so fascinated he didn’t pay attention to the panel.

After the panel, Zort turns to Susan and ask “What was that person standing to the side doing? Their movement is more than what I know of the “body language” of humans.”

Susan does the face that Zort has learned means “confused, not understanding, puzzlement.” then her face changed to “understand, enlightenment.” and Susan says “Oh, right, as the panel went on, I forgot she was there. She is a sign language interpreter. She take what is spoken and translated into sign language so that deaf or hard of hearing people in the audience can understand.”

Zort “Deaf? Hard of hearing? There are being here who are like that? Being who are like that can only communicate through writing. The movement mean words?!”
Susan “Yes, the movement means words. They can communicate with writing, but when in a group it easier if some people can translate it into sometimes easier. It is a whole language using just hands.”
Susan holds up her right appendage and curls down the two fingers farthest from the thumb and with the two fingers closest and holding them together, brings them to the thumb. This means “No.”

moves her hands into a fist and moves the fist up and down “Yes.”

“Without moving the fist, just the hand like this means the letter A.” and B is… Wow, it’ s been a long time since I learned the sign language alphabet.”

Susan “Why don’t I see if the sign language interpreter would be willing to speak with you?”

Zort said “Yes, please let me speak with her.” Then remembered that nodding with one head can mean “Yes.” and to show eagerness and moved its large head up and down many times to show how much he wanted this. Which causes several being around to move a little away from Zort.

anonymous asked:

IDW Rodimus, Drift, Ratchet, Red Alert, Brainstorm, and Fort Max reacting to bot s/o booping their nose

Rodimus laughs and boops you back. He likes the idea of booping, and whenever someone asks him a difficult question he boops their nose as answer. He loves to boop you as a greeting.

Drift melts. You are too cute!  Whenever you boop him he tilts his head up to try to kiss your finger. It tickles.

Ratchet thinks it’s cute and smiles at you gently. Fun Fact: You can wake him up in the morning by gently poking and running your digits down his face. He won’t be as grumpy if you wake him up that way.

Red Alert adores the boops. He will happily boop you back and give you bunny kisses. If you smooch his nose he might die of cute.

Brainstorm makes weird noises every time you boop his nose. He says “honk!” “zort!” “beep!” What a dweeb…

Fortress Maximus has no idea what you’re trying to do. You’re on your tip-toes pointing at his face, jumping to reach his nose. Finally, he lifts you up and you get your boop. He blushes and kisses you.

Healing (5)

5)

Marvin and Schneep rushed around the house looking top to bottom for clues as to where Jack was. They knew Anti would hide him somewhere simple, if not in plain sight, just to mock the other egos and their apparent stupidity.
“Vhere vould he keep a body? Itz not exactly an eazy zing to hide.”
“Where you’re less likely to look.” Marvin answered, “Probably in the last place you’d think of looking.”
“Zo, vhere vould zat be? Vhere have ve not checked?”
They paused to think, but didn’t stop scanning the rooms around them and double checking around doors. As they headed towards the stairs, Marvin suddenly had the answer.
“Jack’s office!” he yelled, “Returning to the scene of the crime is always the answer in crime dramas!”
“It’z alzo a common crime drama trope, if I’m zinging correctly.” The doctor added.
Marvin shrugged. “Anti likes recurring themes. Why do you think he always keeps his throat cut and his clothes black?”
Both the egos rushed up the stairs and stormed towards Jack’s office. They burst through the door and found Jack’s body slumped in his chair, his headphones on as if he was ready to start a video; Anti must have humorously put them on him, probably making a few snidey jokes about his inability to make videos anymore in the process.
As they both lifted his body out of the chair, the doctor explained, “Lazt time I checked, Anti’s poison had clogged itzelf vithin ze spinal cord, mainly around ze cranial area… I zing zat’s vhat it’z called- anyvay, because he vas attacking hiz brain. Zo, hopefully the poison haz not moved.”
“What do you need to do?” Marvin asked, laying down Jack’s body flat on the floor of the office.
“Zomehow ve need to force ze poison to v-one focal point in ze body, idealy just at ze back of hiz neck, and I vill make a zmall incision in ze muscle tizzue and ze poison should drain out of him. Vonce it iz all out you can uze your magic to restart hiz syztems and bring him back to life!”
Marvin’s eyebrows’ raised. The whole thing seemed like it would take a while. “Ah.” he sighed with a tone of dread, “’As easy as that’, eh?”
“Yes!” Schneep barked, his voice sounding a bit more like the confident, unstoppable Doctor Henrik Von Schneeplestein, “Ve can DO Zis! Now, do you mind if I uze your top hat for a zort of drainage bucket?”

There was a long silence in the void where Anti stood. He simply stood still and listened, occasionally twitching his head towards where he heard something moving. “How̵ ͘l̵on͘g i̶s̛ ̀ìt go̧in͡g t͏o ̀ta͟ke yo̶ư ̶t̛o ̨fin͘all̸y̨ m̕a̷ke͞ ͡th̷e ̕f͠i̶r͟st ͘b̡l̨ow̛?̷ ͢I'v̶e̕ g̸o͟t a͡l͏l̛ ͘t́hȩ t̡i̧me͏ in t͝h́e͡ w̕o͢rl̷d.͝ ͝”
Jackaboy kept his distance. He would try to take him down eventually, but he needed to waste time, anything to give the others a chance to save Jack. He quietly snuck around to the back of Anti, waiting for him to lower his knife so he could make a grab for it.
Glancing all around the room for any signs of the hero, Anti smiled and said, “T͘hìs ch͢a̷ra͠de̵ ͜i̷s jus͢t ́w͟hat I͞'͞d̢ ͜exp͠ec̵t̸ f́rom͝ you͢, ͜Ja̛ck͞ab̡oy..̕. ̸M̕aking your͟self͘ ͟ìn̷v͠i̵şi͡b̨le,̶ ̛cow͠er̕i̷ng aw͟a͠y͞,̕ no͏t d̡oi͟ng͝ ͏a̕n̷yt̷h̨i̶ng… Time w̛aste̕r͞!́” Jackaboy took a step forward. Spotting a faint outline of his shoes indicated that his invisibility was wearing off. He needed to make his move soon. Anti continued, ̸”Įf ̀you ͞had̡n’t bęen͏ wàs̷t͜in̛g͠ ͟t͞i̶m͞e, ̸wa͞i̡tiǹg͟ fo͜r͢ ̸t͘h̛e͢ ‘̡p͏erf͏ect̕ ͡móme͞n͞t͟’, Ja̕ck w̕o̧ul̷dn't̕ ̡b͡e dead. ̀Y̡ou cou̵ld h̴ave͝ s͘ave̴d h͞i͞m..́.̴ ̴b͠u̕t ̴no.͝ Y͠ou͏ ̡went͡ c̷r͠yin̷g ͡to͜ ̕thaţ ̛fr͝aud o͘f ͠a͞ m͟a͠ǵicia̛n͝! B͞eca͢u̷s̕e ͝ḩe͘ could̵ d̕o śooo͞oo ̨mu̕ch m̀ore th̸a̵n y͞ou̧ ͡e̕ve̴r ̛co̡uld̵…͝ ͏” Jackaboy’s fists started to clench. He was two steps away from Anti’s back. “'̕Su̷pe͞r h̵er̷o’ m͘y ͏A͠SS̀!”
Anti spun around and swung his knife at Jackaboy. The hero dodged it and made a grab for Anti’s arm. He yanked the knife out of his hand and threw it into the darkness. Anti disappeared then reappeared behind Jackaboy and kicked him hard in the back so he was on the ground. Anti leaped on him and began to strangle him, but Jackaboy flipped his legs up and around Anti and pushed him off. Both the egos got back on their feet and began delivering punches on each other.
Although Anti could glitch from one place to another, Jackaboy was precise, knowing where he would reappear and what he would do next. A pretty even fight, especially now Anti was disarmed. But Anti was a computer virus with green hair, a body of electronic energy that would never get tired, while Jackaboy Man was… just a man. Soon his punches were weaker and less accurate, his legs were starting to shake, his heart was beating uncontrollably fast, making his breathing heavy and his movements slow. Anti made more punches, each hit just as strong as his first, he even began to block each punch Jackaboy made. Slowly Jackaboy’s legs gave in and the hero was on his knees, too weak and exhausted to stop Anti’s kicks to his stomach and face.
“N͘o̸t̨ ̷ąs̕ ̕'super͢’ n͞o͝w̨,̢ ͜ar̸e͡ yo͝u̶?̨.̶.͜.͠”
Anti gave Jackaboy one final and almost earth-shattering punch to the head, knocking the hero out. He left him lying in his own blood and tears as he walked back to the center of the void, closed his bruised up eyes and concentrated. One ‘imposter’ down, two to go.

Using what Marvin considered to be very questionable methods of pushing poison through a dead body, such as very rough back massages and even holding Jack’s body upside-down, Schneep surprisingly succeeded in driving the poison up to the neck and head. Using a clear space on Jack’s desk, they laid his body down, leaving his head hanging over the edge.
“Vight!” Schneeplestein snapped as he pulled up his surgical mask, “To vork.” He pulled out a scalpel from his pocket and made a small incision at the back of Jack’s neck. Almost instantly the gloopy black substance began to drip out and into Marvin’s hat on the floor. “Not quvick enough.” Schneep sighed. He started to make smaller cuts along the first incision to get more poison to flow out.
Marvin’s body stiffened suddenly as a muffled thud came from the room below him. Whatever was going on between Jackaboy and Anti was clearly getting violent. The magician’s heart sped up as he pondered if he should stay with the doctor or try to help Jackaboy. He felt like he needed to do something useful while waiting for the poison to go.
He went back into Jack’s room, where he had left his suitcase all this time, and brought it back into the office. “I think I’ll make the solutions now, while we’re waiting.” he told Schneep, “Better ready than waiting.”
The doctor didn’t respond; he was too focused on Jack.
Marvin opened his case and thumbed through all his neatly labeled herbs and fluids.
‘Ok, focus, Marvin,’ he thought to himself, ‘Lavender aids circulatory problems… that’ll help. Some ciprofloxacin, most probably helpful- same with Ampicillin.’ His ears were starting to hiss. ‘Err… Burdock root might clean his organs a bit… maybe? Peppermint will certainly help his soar throat, but… but is it life educing?’
The hissing was getting noticeably louder, and a high pitched ringing noise joined it. Marvin rubbed his ears, but the annoying noise wouldn’t go away. As if it was coming from within his mind. ‘Ignore it. Focus. Reishi mushroom, gives oxygen. Must use that… Aaaugh, this stupid noise! Forget it… Fo͝rget͏ ít.͢ Right… err, what else? Or is that it? No. It needs more or it won’t ͘wor̢k. Just a few more things… gosh, it seems like a lot. Or n͘ot e͜nough͘. I don’t know, I’m not sure. It̕'̛s n͝o us͝e.́ You can'́t ͘d̴o͡ ͜a̧ny̛ţhi͏ńg to h̛elp h̨im̷ now͜. ͝’
Marvin shook his head viciously. “Get out of my head, Anti!” he growled, “You won’t stop me.”
‘F͟ro̡m̀ ac͜comp̛lish̶i͢n̕g w͝h͜at?’ Anti hissed in his ears, ‘Yoú͘r̨̀ ̀͜wh͡ơļ̴e͡͏͘ ̴c̡͘a͢ree͟ŕ ̶̶͠i̶̸̸s ̛a͝ ̛j̴ò̧͟k̕e̶͘.̢ ́Ý̕O̡͞U a̧͞rȩ͢ ̀a j͞͏ok̛ȩ͡.̡̨̢.̢͟.̷  ͏E͜͠v̨͠e͢r͟ ̛͢n͘otì̴c̶̢͠e̶̢͞d ̢h̨͝oẃ̸̕ ỳǫu̵r̴ ͘c̶͝r͘͢͝ǫwd́͝s̀ gr̵͘o̴͏w on̷̛͜ly̷ wḩ͢en you  ̷͟͞t͏̀͠à̧k̨e̛͝ ̶th̀͡a̛t stup̷̢͝i̢d ̡͞m̴̡a̛s͟͡k͡ ́o̕f͜͟f̵͜?.̢̨..͏ ͞͏̕Théy̷ onl̸̀͢y ̨l̢ó̕v͞e͝ t̢͠͡h̵e̡ ̸͢͝f̵a̴c̶͠e,̵́ ̨ǹ͠ǫ̶͡t ͡th̵e̕ ̶͏͜m̕ą̵n̡͠͡.̸ I̴̢͏t̷'̨͝s̷ ̧̕n͘ot ͟e̸v͜͢ęn̢ ͏ỳ̵͟o̢͡ur͘͢ ̴̡̡f̕a̴̴ćè̵͟.̢.̀.͡ ̨͡it'̵̵̡s̡͞ ́J̵̀͝a̵̡c̕͠k̛͟'͏̸s.͏̴̴’
“Your face is Jack’s too! We’re all part of his image! You know that!”
Marvin turned to Schneeplestein who had been silent this whole time. He was trembling wildly, staring off into nowhere, and slowly his hand, which held his scalpel, was hovering over from Jack’s neck to Schneep’s throat… He screamed as Marvin lunged on him and pulled his hand away. Marvin prized the scalpel out of his hand and threw it aside. The doctor blinked himself out of his trance and shook his head.
“Stay strong, Henrik.” Marvin assured, “Stay focused. You’re doing well, you’re doing really well. Don’t listen to Anti.”
‘Ý̴ǫu͞͡ ͟͞ar̴̴̡ę̛ ̨all no̶bodies!̶̴ Wa̢͠ş̶̕h͢-̨a͏w̡͟a͠y͏s.̶ A ͘͠wa̴s͠t̡͘é̛ ̡̕͡o̢f̡͘͢ ͠͞t̛i̕͢m̨̢͠è͟.̡ ̛ N͜͡o͘͞b͏o̸̡̕d̶y̵͟ ̷̛e̕v͘e̸͘n̵͘͠ re̵m͟͜e̛̕m̵̧b̶̴̀er͢s ̧ y͢o͏u.̨̨͟… ͘͞ų̛n͜ĺ͡i̢͝k̀e̕͢ ̷̵́ m̡e͏͟. ͏T̵͡h̨́é̴y̶͟ A͘͢LL̕͜͠ ̀ŕ͝e͡͞m̶͝e̴m̵̢̛b̵̀e͜͡r͜ ̨Ań͝t̷͠i̛̕͟s̵͘͝ept̶̵͜ic̢̕e͡ỳ͡e̛!’
The doctor and the magician were about to protest until they both felt their spines crumple up to pull them both up right, like soldiers standing to attention. They felt their arms and legs go limp yet they still stood up, as if they were held up by invisible strings. As hard as they tried to snap out of it, Schneep couldn’t stop himself from retrieving his scalpel, nor could Marvin prevent himself from taking out a vial of deadly nightshade and twisting the cap off.
‘No͡w…. b̢ȩ ̵good̀ lit͟tle͟ pup̸p͘et̡s.͏..̡ and́ ̛end th͏is ͜sḩow.́.͏.́’

“look at the pretty buttons! ZORT! they’re all flashy-washy!”

“pinky, under no circumstances are you to touch any controls, no matter HOW flashy-washy, sparkly-warkly, or…um…”

“flickery-wickery?”

“or flickery-wickery.”

anonymous asked:

Doğum günleride batı kültürlerine dahil midir?

Yani uzerine diktiğimiz mumdan, ışıkları kapatıp söylenilen şarkıya kadar bize ait olan neresi var ki? Yapilan pastanın malzemelerinin çoğu batı markalı urunler üstelik.

Bir de sorgularsak bu işi aşırı saçma bir durum olduğu ortaya çıkıyor. Bir insan neden yaşlandığı günü kutlar? Neden bir insana doğduğu icin hediyeler alınır? Mesela madem eşini çok seviyorsun git anne babasına hediye al doğum günün de -cok guzel evlat yetişirmişsiniz Allah razı olsun- de bir manası olsun. Ayrıca doğum günü kutlamaları, dansa davetler falan zaten Islam ile alakasi olmayan türdeler, kadın erkek karışık ortamlar vs.

Doğum günü zart günü zort günü boş insanların, beyinleri tv ile uyuşmuş, sorgulama nedir bilmeyen abilerin ablaların işidir. Müslüman sorgular, boş vakit bırakmaz kendisine, sürekli ve geçici aciliyetleri vardır dolayısıyla bunca işinin arasına bir de batı dayatması bir eğlence sıkıştırmaz/sıkıştırmamalı.

“E ama bir gün kafa dağıtıp eğleniyoruz” diyenler içinde “Dua et o gün son günün olmasın” deriz anca.

şimdi hoşlandığın veya aşık olduğun kişiyi düşün, ne güzel dimi hayallerin kadar muhteşem ve pürüzsüz. şuan napıyordur sence sımsıcak evinde uyuyor mudur hayır hayır saat daha erken ben sana ne yaptığını söyleyeyim sevgili tumblrcı kardeşim şuan sımsıcak evinde kapısı açık şekilde zar zort osurarak sıçıyordur. yine iyisin sayemde bu akşam aşk acısından kurtuldun hadi eyw.