zodiacity

Aries —
ripping off the band-aid, waking through a forest, being center stage, police sirens, fingernails tapping against a desk, boiling water, a sunflower field.

Taurus —
chocolate melting, the ticking sound of a clock, blanket forts, sliding across a wooden floor in your socks, using sticks as swords, sunsets from the hood of a car.

Gemini —
the scent that follows after you blow out a candle, how handwriting is like a voice, your first visit to a haunted house, a rigid spine, the sound of crunching leaves, church bells.

Cancer —
holding hands in a hospital, lemonade on the hottest day of the year, a psychic’s parlor, sage & lavender & vanilla, hot air balloon ride over the city, windmills.

Leo —
city life at night, an acid trip, paint splattered at the wall, bubblegum, a one-way ticket, broken mirrors.

Virgo —
fireflies in the summer, back of the class, pacing & the click clack of high heels, bleach, waves crashing, sun kissed skin.

Libra —
when the couple says “i do”, lucky charms, bonfires, finger painting, blowing kisses, ballet shows, sugar on the tip of your tongue, outstretched palms in the wrong direction.

Scorpio —
being stuck at the top of a ferris wheel, wind in your hair during a midnight car ride at 100 mph, skin on skin, magnets on the refrigerator, a ceiling fan in the dead of night, sticky notes, foxes in the bushes.

Sagittarius —
jet lag, a wolf howling, bad puns, five star restaurants, burning your tongue, chipped nail polish, walking barefoot through the mud, treehouses.

Capricorn —
a loaded gun, the first snow fall of the year when everything is still and silent, the first breath after a panic attack, sun showers, the dreamy state when you’re running on no sleep, candyland, breaking through the surface.

Aquarius —
cracking open a fortune cookie, city lights in the rain, scissors & wrapping paper, bats in caves, sneaking out for the first time, watching the sunrise with your best friends, a wildflower breaking through the cracks of a sidewalk.

Pisces —
a canoe on the lake at dawn, windchimes, spring, hundred year old trees, jazz music & feather boas, dream journals, glitter eyeshadow, art museums.

—  feeling association with the signs, a.l.
Zodiac Signs as Memes
  • Aries:Rickrolling (March 29th, 2007)
  • Taurus:Mmm Whatcha Say (May 19th, 2005)
  • Gemini:Derp face (May 21st, 2003)
  • Cancer:I'm in me mum's car, broom broom (July 21st, 2014)
  • Leo:Numa numa (August 14th, 2006)
  • Virgo:Little grey cat (September 17th, 2014)
  • Libra:I MIGHT boycott bath and body works!! (October 7th, 2014)
  • Scorpio:Crave that mineral (October 27th, 2014)
  • Sagittarius:YOLO (November 29, 2011)
  • Capricorn:I've never heard of a George Glass at our sküle (January 15th, 2015)
  • Aquarius:Sad frog (Pepe) (January 22nd, 2009)
  • Pisces:Doge (February 23rd, 2010)
MARCH HOROSCOPES

Pisces, it must be both sublime and
exhausting to be so luminous.

Aries, you do not owe your progress
to anyone.

Taurus, tell your heart to stop acting like a body.

Gemini, finding happiness
is a radical political act.

Cancer, it is impossible to fall
out of love gracefully.

Leo, just because it hurts
does not mean it is poetry.

Virgo, it is truly fascinating how you interpret the world around you.

Libra, their hair ties are still on your nightstand.

Scorpio, quit hanging up the ghosts
of people who used to love you.

Sagittarius, there is no shame
in leaving or being left.

Capricorn, you cannot fall in love with a house fire again.

Aquarius, remember that good people
can do terrible things.
—  MARCH HOROSCOPES, by Blythe Baird (2015)
THE SIGNS WHEN JEALOUS
  • Aries:Aggressively sighs constantly, will become enraged when someone accuses them of being jealous.
  • Taurus:Makes sarcastic responses, doesn't bother hiding it, tries to assert their possession over the person.
  • Gemini:Is jealous for .2 seconds then bounces to the next person.
  • Cancer:Gets really emotional and self-loathing, thinks that the other person is better than them anyways.
  • Leo:In public laughs it off, is super upset in private.
  • Virgo:Tries to analyze what the other person has that they don't, really bad at hiding it.
  • Libra:Tries to make the other person jealous in return.
  • Scorpio:Gets enraged, there is no hiding jealousy in a Scorpio. Gets incredibly possessive and territorial.
  • Sagittarius:Doesn't really care.
  • Capricorn:Really good at pretending they're not jealous, emotional wrecks behind closed doors.
  • Aquarius:Confronts the person they're jealous of and tells them to back off.
  • Pisces:Blubbering mess, asks all their friends for advice.
THE SIGNS DOING AN ASSIGNMENT THAT'S DUE THE NEXT DAY
  • Aries:Screaming, throwing books everywhere, ingesting inhuman amounts of coffee, slamming doors, ripping papers, tossing their phone in the toilet.
  • Taurus:Can't start until they're had a snack, nap, shower, break, and then they sit down. And they don't stand up until they are done.
  • Gemini:Hysterical laughter, is in denial, writes the most epic bullshit ever, has a meltdown at 3 am, suffers from loss of identity and motivation.
  • Cancer:Intense crying on their laptop keyboard, the laptop malfunction, electrocutes them, and all of their work has been erased off the face of the work. Turns in doctor's note.
  • Leo:Lies to themselves, says they have plenty of time. Says they'll start at 7, and when they check the time, its 7:03. Now they have to wait until 8. Damn it.
  • Virgo:Begins writing a bunch of drafts, is never satisfied, pulls an all-nighter, has three panic attacks, but turns in a pretty decent assignment.
  • Libra:Instead of starting, does elaborate research on how to fake sick, comes up with a million excuses, and practices executing them in the mirror.
  • Scorpio:Hates themselves extensively, cries through half of the paper, uses caps locks aggressively, blogs about how much they hate themselves and their life.
  • Sagittarius:Cannot seem to start, calls all of their friends and ends up paying someone to do the assignment for them. Plan flops miserably, skips school.
  • Capricorn:Loathes themselves, cries in the shower, then gets down to business. Thinks they'll fail, gets an A. We hate them.
  • Aquarius:Actually performs best under pressure. Has a game plan, perfectly executes it, goes to sleep at 1:30 a.m. Can't sleep because they're too wired.
  • Pisces:Has three months to do the assignment, spends the day before coming up with excuses why they shouldn't do it, skips school.
Signs In The Shower
  • Aries:Accidentally puts the water on too high, they bare through the pain bc they cannot be proven weak
  • Taurus:Probably had a bowl of popcorn next to the shower for when they wanna eat
  • Gemini:Wincing over in pain because they have shampoo in their eyes
  • Cancer:Water is also too hot and then they kick something in the shower and end up on the bottom of the shower in pain
  • Leo:The star of their own concert in the shower
  • Virgo:The weirdos who brush their teeth in the shower
  • Libra:They take baths with bathbombs and take photos of it for their tumblr
  • Scorpio:Forgets to put the flap of the shower curtain inside of the shower and gets water all over the bathroom floor
  • Sagittarius:They don't shower. Ever.
  • Capricorn:Taking showers without warm water. like how do you do that?
  • Aquarius:Contemplating the meaning of life
  • Pisces:Sitting in the shower pretending they're under a waterfall
THE SIGNS EMBARRASED
  • Aries:........I will kill all of you
  • Taurus:Whatever
  • Gemini:Shut up I'm not even blushing *is bright pink*
  • Cancer:Oh wow sorry I'm so dumb *about to cry*
  • Leo:Fuck dis fuck u
  • Virgo:*INTERNALLY SCREAMING*
  • Libra:HAHAHAHAHAHA IM SO FUNNY GUYS
  • Scorpio:Don't touch me
  • Sagittarius:Oh well!!!
  • Capricorn:Gets a lump in their throat
  • Aquarius:Stares at a wall for the next ten minutes
  • Pisces:*is used to it by now*
Let's play the zodiac tumblr matching game?
  1. Answer this post with your Sun, Moon, Mercury, Mars, Venus.
  2. LIKE THIS: sun Capricorn, moon Gemini, mercury Aquarius, mars Aries, venus Capricorn.
  3. GO TO THIS PAGE FOR COMPATIBILITY CHART: http://www.cafeastrology.com/articles/signcompatiblitygrid.html
  1. THINGS TO REMEMBER WHEN MATCHING:
  2. Your Sun/Their Moon - soulmate feel
  3.  Moon / Moon - Same love style
  4. sun / sun - bestfriend feel
  5. mercury /mercury - communicates amazingly
  6. mars/ venus or venus/mars - the actions feels loving
  7. mars / mars - fights are rare and you understand what each other means when it comes to actions.


Look through the answers and message the person that matches yours with “WE’RE PERFECT! :)”