yup. truth

  • Matthew: i like your pants
  • Stephanie: thanks, they were 50% off
  • Matthew: i'd like them 100% off
  • Stephanie: the store can't just sell free stuff, Matthew
  • Matthew: no, that's not what i —
  • Stephanie: that's a terrible way to run a business

grumpyfoxes  asked:

Part 2 witch!au!!! I wanna know more about their deal and why Neil's not Andrews familiar!

Neil is not Andrew’s familiar because he is not a spirit. Familiars are essentially the essence of a witch’s spirit and inner self taking the form of an animal. Gaining a familiar is a complicated process and requires blood magic, and Neil wasn’t summoned to Andrew’s side. It’s kind of hard to explain, but you know *jazz hands* magic.

As for the deal, it went something like this:

  • it’s the beginning of summer and andrew is tired
  • being around annoyances for nine months was exhausting and the only reason andrew is letting kevin inside his car is because of their promise
  • kevin stays in the car when andrew goes out
  • not too far but far enough that andrew can pretend to be alone
  • except there’s a cat in the tree above him that’s practically suffocating in binding magic
  • really, it’s a surprise that the cat’s even keeping himself upright
  • andrew… well, he’s not about to let a cat suffer so he takes the cat and does some magic to dispel the bind
    • side note: binding magic isn’t bad in any way
    • it’s usually used to make teammates/partners stronger
    • it can also be used as a sort of marriage ceremony
    • typically, binding magic isn’t permanent and requires the consent of all parties
    • however, the deal with the cat was that a taboo sort of binding spell was used so that he wouldn’t be able to escape his master without causing pain unto himself
    • that spell is not public knowledge–only the influential are meant to know about it
    • back to the story

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Sterek AU: Forever Be My Valentine

The fourteenth of February marks the day Stiles’ vocabulary vanished leaving just a single word to be uttered in response to Derek’s proposal:

                                                    Y E S!

However, the shocked filter doesn’t last long as a veritable torrent of, “Derek”, “I love you”, and praises in both English and Polish tumble from his lips. 

“I can’t believe you did all this. And here I thought the only romantic bone in your body was mine.” Stiles’ salacious eyebrow waggling falters slightly at a firm, yet loving, swat to the ass by his chuckling fiancé.

“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” Derek smirks, nosing his way down his jawline to his favorite spot on his neck just below his ear, eliciting a delicious shiver.

“Oh my god, that was terrible,” Stiles chokes on laugh. “Thank god you didn’t lead with that or I would have reconsidered my answer.”

Stiles let out a yelp as Derek nips at a tender spot.

“Lie.”

Stiles tilted his head giving him more room to explore. 

“Mmm. Yup. Truth is you had me at ‘This is private property.’ There were many very public things I wanted to do to said property.”

Derek eyes flash as he emits a playful growl as his hands slide down to grasp his ass and quickly hoist him up. Stiles’ legs automatically wrap around his hips as a surprised moan barely has time to escape; lips becoming entangled with his own. Blunt teeth gently nibble Stiles’ bottom lip, tongue soothing over the indentations, silently pleading for entrance; a satisfied rumble answers when it’s granted. Derek pulls back just enough to gaze into honeyed eyes filled with love and eternal mischief, slowly engulfed by blown pupils. His right hand cups his jaw, thumb gently traveling across the path of moles to plump, reddened lips.

“Feel like doing some trespassing tonight?”

Stiles tosses his head back, whole body shaking with laughter. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I’m going to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Derek grins brightly at that thought “Not having any second thoughts, are you?”

Stiles’ arms tighten around Derek’s neck, pulling him into passionate kiss that leaves them both breathless.

“Not on your life. I love you so much, Der.”

“Love you too, Stiles.”

The night was filled with saccharine whispers, breathless moans, praises to deities that may not exist, content groans, laughter and love. Stiles may have trespassed all those years ago, but they have since established a home in each other. 

CS FF: Dare to Love

Summary:  Emma and Killian play a married couples’ version of ‘Truth or Dare’, resulting in some very sexy and revealing moments between them.

Rating: M

Note: This was written for the CS Hiatus Challenge here on Tumblr.  The prompt was Truth or Dare.  Hope you enjoy it!  ~Steph

…Dare to Love: Part 1/1…

Emma settled next to Killian on the couch, her hand moving to stroke the hair at the nape of his neck.  

“So Henry is spending the whole weekend at Regina’s.  We have the entire house to ourselves for the first time in our six month old marriage.  Whatever should we do?” she whispered in his ear.

Killian felt his breath catch in his chest at the pure lust in his wife’s voice.  He lifted the remote and turned off the television.  He then turned to her, meeting her eyes.  His tongue darted out to lick at his lips and Emma felt herself begin to grow wet at the mere sight.

“Well, love, I believe I can think of a thing or two to occupy ourselves,” he said.

Emma smiled, arching an eyebrow.  “Care to make it interesting?”

“How so?”

“We play truth or dare,” she said.  

Killian’s brow creased. “I’m afraid I’m not familiar with that game.”

Emma shrugged.  “It’s exactly what it sounds like.  You can either choose truth or dare.  Truth means you have to answer any question truthfully.  Dare means you have to accept any challenge.”

Killian offered her a lopsided grin.  “Well, you know I love a challenge.”

Emma smiled.  “Great,” she said.  

She stood up and found her laptop.  In minutes, she had printed a sheet of truth questions and dare challenges designed specifically for married couples.  She figured this would make it more interesting than producing them themselves. Emma quickly cut them up into strips and then retreated to the kitchen to retrieve two bowls.  She returned to the living room and placed the bowls down on the table.  She put all of the truth strips in one and the dares in another.  

“All set,” she said, turning to her husband.

“Perhaps you should go first since I’ve never played this game before,” he suggested.

Emma nodded. “Okay,” she agreed.  “I choose truth,” she said and then pulled a strip out of the bowl.

Emma read the strip aloud. “What is the sweetest thing your spouse has ever done for you?”

Emma thought for a moment, her eyes flitting across Killian’s face.  “Hmm, this is hard.  You always do sweet things for me.”

Killian smiled and lifted his hand to caress her cheek.  “Get used to it, love.  There is a lifetime of sweet gestures in your future.”

A smile spread across her lips.  “Obviously, big gestures like trading your ship for me are incredibly sweet, but I think it’s the small, everyday things that mean the most to me.  I’d have to say all the times you brought me grilled cheese and onion rings.  You always know when I’m too busy or preoccupied to remember to eat.  The first time you did it showed me how much you truly cared.”

Killian shrugged.  “I also know how grumpy you get when you’re hungry.  It’s really for the protection of all.”

Emma laughed and gently swatted his arm.  “Your turn,” she said.

“Truth,” he said and pulled out a strip.  “What was your first impression of your spouse?” he read.

His eyes lifted to his wife’s and a slow grin appeared on his lips.

“Be nice,” she said with a chuckle.

He tilted his head to the side.  “So is this before or after you held a knife to my throat and tied me to a tree?”

“Your call,” she replied with a shrug.  

He bobbed his head.  “Well, when I first laid eyes on you, I knew you were the most beautiful lass in all the realms.”

Emma felt a blush creep into her cheeks.  

“And then after you held a knife to my throat and tied me to a tree, I knew you were the strongest and bravest lass I’d ever met.  And I wanted nothing more than to get to know you.”

“And know me you did,” she said, bringing her hand to his and squeezing.  

She smiled and said, “My turn.  Dare.”

Killian waggled his eyebrows as she pulled out a slip.

“Kiss your favourite part of your spouse,” Emma read.

Killian grinned at her, as Emma’s gaze slowly perused her husband’s gorgeous figure.

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Dare to Love

Summary: Emma and Killian play a married couples’ version of ‘Truth or Dare’, resulting in some very sexy and revealing moments between them.

Word count: 5,937

Rating: M for smut and language


Emma settled next to Killian on the couch, her hand moving to stroke the hair at the nape of his neck.  

“So Henry is spending the whole weekend at Regina’s.  We have the entire house to ourselves for the first time in our six month old marriage.  Whatever should we do?” she whispered in his ear.

 

Killian felt his breath catch in his chest at the pure lust in his wife’s voice.  He lifted the remote and turned off the television.  He then turned to her, meeting her eyes.  His tongue darted out to lick at his lips and Emma felt herself begin to grow wet at the mere sight.

 

“Well, love, I believe I can think of a thing or two to occupy ourselves,” he said.

 

Emma smiled, arching an eyebrow.  “Care to make it interesting?”

 

“How so?”

 

“We play truth or dare,” she said.  

 

Killian’s brow creased. “I’m afraid I’m not familiar with that game.”

 

Emma shrugged.  “It’s exactly what it sounds like.  You can either choose truth or dare.  Truth means you have to answer any question truthfully.  Dare means you have to accept any challenge.”

 

Killian offered her a lopsided grin.  “Well, you know I love a challenge.”

 

Emma smiled.  “Great,” she said.  

 

She stood up and found her laptop.  In minutes, she had printed a sheet of truth questions and dare challenges designed specifically for married couples.  She figured this would make it more interesting than producing them themselves. Emma quickly cut them up into strips and then retreated to the kitchen to retrieve two bowls.  She returned to the living room and placed the bowls down on the table.  She put all of the truth strips in one and the dares in another.  

 

“All set,” she said, turning to her husband.

 

“Perhaps you should go first since I’ve never played this game before,” he suggested.

 

Emma nodded. “Okay,” she agreed.  “I choose truth,” she said and then pulled a strip out of the bowl.

 

Emma read the strip aloud. “What is the sweetest thing your spouse has ever done for you?”

 

Emma thought for a moment, her eyes flitting across Killian’s face.  “Hmm, this is hard.  You always do sweet things for me.”

 

Killian smiled and lifted his hand to caress her cheek.  “Get used to it, love.  There is a lifetime of sweet gestures in your future.”

 

A smile spread across her lips.  “Obviously, big gestures like trading your ship for me are incredibly sweet, but I think it’s the small, everyday things that mean the most to me.  I’d have to say all the times you brought me grilled cheese and onion rings.  You always know when I’m too busy or preoccupied to remember to eat.  The first time you did it showed me how much you truly cared.”

 

Killian shrugged.  “I also know how grumpy you get when you’re hungry.  It’s really for the protection of all.”

 

Emma laughed and gently swatted his arm.  “Your turn,” she said.

 

“Truth,” he said and pulled out a strip.  “What was your first impression of your spouse?” he read.

 

His eyes lifted to his wife’s and a slow grin appeared on his lips.

 

“Be nice,” she said with a chuckle.

 

He tilted his head to the side.  “So is this before or after you held a knife to my throat and tied me to a tree?”

 

“Your call,” she replied with a shrug.  

 

He bobbed his head.  “Well, when I first laid eyes on you, I knew you were the most beautiful lass in all the realms.”

 

Emma felt a blush creep into her cheeks.  

 

“And then after you held a knife to my throat and tied me to a tree, I knew you were the strongest and bravest lass I’d ever met.  And I wanted nothing more than to get to know you.”

 

“And know me you did,” she said, bringing her hand to his and squeezing.  

She smiled and said, “My turn.  Dare.”

 

Killian waggled his eyebrows as she pulled out a slip.

 

“Kiss your favourite part of your spouse,” Emma read.

 

Killian grinned at her, as Emma’s gaze slowly perused her husband’s gorgeous figure.

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Locked In // Jay Park

Originally posted by jaywalkerzz

Pairing: Jay Park x Reader

Genre: Fluff // Comedy

Summary//Request: Anonymous said: The reader is a focused higher up employee for AOMG and jay never really paid that much attention to her but after some sort of encounter he becomes totally smitten. Fluffy please :) 


“Can you make sure to have the campaign translated and sent to me before 10 tonight? I need to proofread it and make sure there are no mistakes in English before we send it off.” You said to your assistant, Lisa, as you packed up your bags for the day.

“Absolutely Miss (Y/N), I’ll get to it right now. When is our deadline?” she replied, typing on her laptop and looking up at you eagerly. You smiled, thinking back to when you were just like her – fresh faced and new to a big company.

“Deadline is tomorrow morning! Ahh, translation for promotion is stressful sometimes, right?” you chuckled, placing your hand on her shoulder and giving it a little squeeze. She let out a silent sigh and nodded her head in jest.

“Yes, but with you looking after me…it’s not so stressful”

You smiled at her kind hearted words, before waving her goodbye and stepping out of your office.

You’d been an AOMG employee for the past 4 years, starting off as someone who went and got people their coffee and lunch. Now, you were head of translation in the marketing and promotions division and you had 7 people working under you. You’d worked your ass off to get to the position you were in now. The pay was great and you couldn’t complain about the hours as they were flexible for you, and you got to talk to and converse with a lot of the talented acts that filled the ranks of AOMG – although you never really had the opportunity to have a proper conversation with the man himself; Jay Park. When it came to the relationship you had with him, it was purely business – only ever talking to him through email or his P.A when one of you had a query regarding your line of work. You couldn’t deny that he was beautiful, that you hadn’t wished before that you could be as friendly with him as everyone else seemed to be, but usually – when it came to the serious side of things; Jay was all work.

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ISFP x Hogwarts Houses
  • Gryffindor: All great divas of the past were ISFPs from Gryffindor. Because you know... they´ve got the silent allure, the certain something it takes. They are popular and openly praised, which confuses them, but they continue anyway. The type to drop a selfie and has everyone raving in their private messages. Multi-talented, rebellious and bold on demand - think Mick Jagger. They like to travel with ENFPs from Slytherin.
  • Hufflepuff: Jakie Kennedy. Yes, they are very big on fashion and all contemporary trends, picking out unique pieces. Their twitter blows up with all types of feeds, streams, messages. They can be very reclusive and lazy, but their ESFP friends from Ravenclaw make sure to engage them in all sorts of activities. Hufflepuff ISFPs live for art blogs and probably own a Banksy bag. Charming just like their fellows from Gryffindor. Use a ton of emojis. Excellent writers in any genre.
  • Ravenclaw: Down to earth, but still very dreamy. Can be the odd one out, because Ravenclaw contains so many individualists tying to out-individualize each other. They don´t let anybody change them. They love pranking others and have probably opened a Youtube account about it. Chillionaires with a lot of clever insights, basically Brad Pitt; their Angelinas being the tough ESTPs from Gryffindor. Text and game at the speed of light because of their coordination skill (and practice of course). Discover trend apps before everyone else.
  • Slytherin: Always running a secret agenda. Have a lot of love to give, but they choose wisely. Lady Gaga-like ambition - take it slow, hold back the tears, and don´t be afraid (to shock!). Existential crisis on two legs. Despite the reputation Slytherin has, these ISFPs have an aura of cuteness and can attune themselves to many environments, making them popular. Know exactly what they want. "Hard" by Rihanna is their anthem, especially as Rihanna is a Slytherin ISFP, too.