yumeiro patissiere

8

So I was gonna dedicate my famous hot chocolate recipe to the show Yumeiro Patissiere but there’s a fandom that needs this comforting drink of perfection so much more right now.

prayer circle for snk
prayer circle for jean
weeps forever

AHEM ANYWAY. Lets talk hot chocolate. There are so many ways you can make hot chocolate, but there are two main ways.

way #1: the shit way. Get Hershey Swiss bullshit outta my face. 

way #2: the rad way.

If you’re doing hot chocolate right, you’re not gonna need a hot chocolate mix, fuck, you’re not even gonna need sugar.

That’s the way I’m gonna show you right now. It’s literally the perfect drink because it’s warm, creamy, but it’s flavor’s hella complex because of spices and all that jazz. It’s basically art.

~

Perfect Hot Chocolate (aka Perfect Fandom Coping Mechanism)
(serves: 2-3)

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Ingredients*-

  • ¾ cup milk
  • 2/3 (14 oz) can of coconut cream
  • ½ cup heavy cream
  • 9 oz bittersweet chocolate chunks/chips/etc.
  • 1/8 tsp salt
  • 1 pinch nutmeg
  • 2 pinches cinnamon
  • 2 pinches cardamom
  • ½ pinch cayenne pepper
  • ½ tsp vanilla extract

*THESE ARE ALL VERY FLEXIBLE MEASUREMENTS. If you want it creamier, add more chocolate. Spicier? More cinnamon and cayenne. Coconut-ier? More coconut cream? Thinner? more milk. The choice is yours, nerd.

~

Procedure-

  • Add all ingredients into a medium sized sauce pan over medium heat, stirring constantly until all the chocolate is melted and the drink is sort of thick and hella creamy.
  • Taste the hot chocolate and add whatever extras you think it needs. You da boss bro. You da boss.
  • Top with whipped cream, add a dollop of vanilla ice cream, or eat with some chocolate chip or checker cookies

~

Wow. you are totally done making the most elaborate and delicious hot chocolate EVER. 

Real talk, I think it’s legitimately physically impossible to dislike this hot chocolate. Like it literally has anything anyone could ask for. I’m betting real money that if you asked this hot chocolate to be the best man at your wediding, it would without question, regardless of it’s gender (does hot cocoa have a gender? idk).

So enjoy it. Love it. Because once the secret gets out that you are a hot chocolate connoisseur, you will never be able to make this angelic gift from god again without people hulking around you like mini titans.

Later, nerds. Enjoy the recipe.

7

So as someone who really loves cooking, I can say for a fact that I really love anime and manga that involve cooking. 

One that I’m particularly fond of is Yumeiro Patissiere, because oh my god the food looks so amazing and I always feel hella inspired to make dellicious stuff whenever I watch the show.

Yesterday, I decided to take a crack at a sort of tedious (But super worth it) dish called the Mille Crepe, which basically means I make a jillion crepes, make some pastry cream to swipe over those lil guys, add some fruits, and make a cake out of it. So that’s what I did. 

And oh my god, it looked and tasted so rad.

~

Mille Crepe aux Fraises
(serves: probs like 10 people)

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Ingredients for Crepes-

  • 2 cups milk
  • ¾ cup water
  • 4 eggs
  • 1 egg yolk
  • 6 Tablespoons butter, melted
  • 2 Tablespoons sugar
  • 2 teaspoon vanilla
  • ¼ tsp salt
  • 2 cups flour
  • oil or clarified butter for cooking the crepes

-

Ingredients for Filling-

  • 2 cups milk
  • 2 cups heavy cream
  • 8 egg yolks
  • 2 Tbsp corn starch
  • 2/3 cup sugar
  • approx 2 tsp vanilla (give or take)
  • Thinly sliced strawberries (as needed)

~

Procedure for Crepes-

  • Mix all the ingredients with a regular hand held whisk. Combine them thoroughly because you don’t want any lumps in this beautiful masterpiece, right? Just remember, the anti-anthem of this recipe is ‘My Humps’ by fergie. ye.
  • Once that’s all done, let it chill in the fridge for an hour, and in that time, work on your pastry cream.
  • Once that’s all ready, heat a large pan up to high and brush it with cooking oil or clarified butter. Once it’s hot enough, pour about a ladle-full of crepe batter on. Move the pan around and stuff so that the batter’s thinly spread and sorta circular.
  • Wait until the edges are pale and starting to brown, then flip it over and let it cook for one more minute. After that, plop that shit onto a plate and repeat for the rest of the batter till you’re out. IF YOU ARE HAVING ISSUES WITH FLIPPING THINGS OR WHATEVER, CLICK HERE FOR A DUMB TUTORIAL.
  • Once all your crepes are done, let them chill in the fridge for about 20 minutes until they’re not hella hot anymore, then get started on dat cake-makin process.

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Procedure for Pastry Cream-

  • Put the milk, vanilla and heavy cream in a medium sized sauce pan and heat for about 5-10 minutes, until it’s hot but not boiling, then remove it from the heat.
  • During that time, mix the eggs, corn starch, and sugar in a bowl. Temper them by gradually adding about a cup of the hot cream mixture into the eggs while stirring it a shit ton so the eggs don’t curdle.
  • Once it’s tempered, pour the egg and cream mixture into the rest of the cream and turn the heat on low. Stir frequently to prevent the eggs from curdling and keep at it until it’s thick enough to cover the back of a wooden spoon.
  • Once that happens, remove it from the heat and put the custard in a sealed container, refrigerate until it’s what’s cooler than bein cool. 

~

Assembly-

  • Place one crepe on the plate, then add a thin layer of cream and then some strawberries, then top it with another crepe and repeat.
  • Don’t add strawberries to every single layer and use the cream sparingly, this is a cake not a mess of cream and fruit you gosh darn plebians.
  • Let it chill for at least an hour in the fridge, covered, so the cake will set. I neglected to do this because I am a dumb, but don’t be like me. Be better than me. 

~

And ye. that’s it. you just made a super fancy cake. I hope you’re proud of yourself cause I am. Now eat it. EAT AND EMBRACE THE FACT THAT YOU WASTED SO MUCH TIME MAKING SUCH AN AMAZING DESSERT.

Feed it to your favorite person. They will be so impressed trust me omg. 

aight nerds, well, I’d love to stay and chat buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut I don’t wanna stay and chat. 

Later, nerds. Later.