youtube has changed my life

My YouTube Story

I just spent a good while crying about some really beautiful messages I’ve received in the past couple days and I thought that now was a good time to write this.

This is a very long post and to avoid clogging up all of your dashes I have cut it off here. Essentially, this is me pouring my heart out to all of the Internet about how my time on YouTube has changed my life. Read if you dare.

Keep reading

i love you.

i want you guys to know how much i appreciate you. i love every single one of you more than i could ever love myself and i hope for only good things in your life. i hope you feel happy and accepted and loved because you have a beautiful soul and you deserve the world. you, specifically you who’s reading this right now, mean so much to me. i know there are some people out there who will brush this off because they don’t think this applies to them, but dude this absolutely applies to you. i care about your well-being and i want you to know i am here if you ever need a friend.

thank you to everyone who’s ever talked to me, said hello to me, loved me, or been my friend. i know i don’t talk a whole lot about myself on here, so i’m gonna tell you about this: when i joined tumblr in january, i was in a very bad place in my life; i had nothing that i felt was worth staying alive for. and that’s when i started watching mark, and then jack, and then the grumps and matthias and everyone else i’m watching now. that’s when i made this blog to connect with people with the same interests, and holy shit did i meet people. i will remember this time of my life forever because youtube has literally changed my life: i am more confident in myself, i have met some of the best people i’ve ever known on here, i am happier with myself and my life, and i feel free. there are so many other things about myself that have changed since this year but i’m too tired to list them off.

so long story short: i have never loved as much as i do now, i have never felt more loved or accepted as i do now, and i have never been happier than i am at this very exact moment. obviously i still have my low days but they’ve gotten a lot less severe than they used to be. and i owe it all to you, this community. i love you all so much.

anonymous asked:

I love Mark, but I swear to god.... if he doesn't stop talking about how awesome his life/job is, I'm gonna flip a goddamn table. Sorry, I'm just having one of those days where I'd fight a rabid Lindsay Lohan for her last moonpie on top of a skyscraper during a typhoon of blood and acid rain, if i could live just one day of Mark's life. Even one of his shitty days.

Alright, I’d hate to sound rude, but I don’t agree with you at all, anon. I do understand that some people find Mark talking about the pros of his life/job a bit annoying. Take it from Mark’s perspective, like he said, becoming successful on youtube is all about luck. Just working hard and putting everything you have into your channel won’t cut it, if you want to make youtube your career. He lost his first channel, and he almost didn’t try again because putting so much hard work into something you love and then losing it all really sucks. When he made his second channel, his videos attracted a lot of people in a short amount of time. Eventually, he was able to make YouTube his job, and didn’t have to worry about it just being a hobby. That’s so rare. What’s even rarer is how good of a community the fanbase is. I’ll admit, we have our fair share of drama and fights, but I think that I can safely call this fanbase one of the best fanbases on youtube. Just imagine how Mark, centered around all of this, feels. Like, everything I described happened in a relatively quickly. (More than) Three years it took for all of this to happen. Mark has been able to do so many great things, meet awesome people, and help make the world a better place all because of youtube, all because of us. I can’t imagine how it must feel for Mark to have so many people look up to him, enjoy his content, and, in some cases, make really good friends with other people who share an interest with Mark and his videos. He’s amazed with everything that happening around him all the time, so I think him explaining how youtube has changed his life is quite fine, in my opinion.

And another thing, “if i could live just one day of Mark’s life. Even one of his shitty days.” Thinking that Mark’s life is relatively easy isn’t something you should do. With the perks of youtube comes the cons as well. There’s a lot of stress involving being a successful youtuber. Not just the “oh I’ve gotta put up quality videos for my fans” kind of stress, there is a lot of responsibility stress as well. With all of the popularity he has right now, there are a lot of people who insist that Mark doesn’t deserve what he has, or that he’s fake, or that he’s “a Pewdiepie copy!!!1!!!1!!111!!” etc. Being the “leader” (I know Mark doesn’t like that word, but I’m using it anyway) of over 7 million+ people is a lot of responsibility. Mark has a lot of people looking up to to him for guidance, so he has to set a good example for everyone; because if he even has the slightest of mess ups, people will rip him apart. Even on a shitty day, Mark puts on a happy face in order to keep his fans, us, happy. That’s gotta take a lot of strength, and I have so much respect for him for that.

Even though Mark sometimes talks about how great his life/job is because of youtube,it seems that people forget that being a youtuber isn’t easy, either.

Sorry about how long this is, I guess I had a lot stored up in me on this matter, lol.


At the conclusion of my senior year in high school, my AP English teacher suggested a book for summer reading. “Looking for Alaska is a great read, I think you all will really enjoy it,” she gushed. Unfortunately I was desperate for a break from being told what to read and when, and as such, thoroughly ignored her recommendation.

Years and years later, I picked up The Fault in Our Stars after seeing it advertised all over the busy New York City subway. A bright yellow sign with the words, “The #1 Mega Best-Seller Everyone is Reading” had become part of my bi-daily commute. I had no-less than 8 friends reading it, and since reading became fun again post-academia (and I needed a new book to read for my next Tipsy Book Review) I bought a copy at the 45th street Barnes and Noble. 

That video– by some amazing stroke of luck– made it to the author and fellow youtuber, John Green, and he has since changed my life in ways that will stay with me forever. He has supported my channel, given priceless advice, and above all, been this long-distance friend that has an unwavering belief that I can make my own dreams come true. 

I cannot thank him, his delightful wife, Sarah, Stan, and the rest of the team enough for inviting me to Indiana and being so professional, gracious, patient, and encouraging. This experience will no doubt inform the rest of my entertainment and comedy career, and I am better for it. 

Thanks so much, guys.

xo - Akilah

p.s.: I can’t wait to share our work with you!!!!!!!

p.s.s.: There may be another John Green inspired Tipsy Book Review in the works…

So like 5ish minutes ago I reached 2k on tumblr.

I dream a lot and I kind of have high expectations, but seriously, I thought it would take me like a year to hit 1k, so the fact that I’ve had this blog for 4 months now is like the most insane thing I’ve ever experienced.

Tumblr used to be an obsession of mine, but I always envied people who had friends on here, people who came on every day to smiling faces and questions in their ask boxes.

It’s a huge part of my life now, and honestly? I’m really not sure how I would have made it through this year without y'all

I don’t really tell almost anyone this, but I was struggling a bit in early 2014. Even though I was generally alright, I felt bored, distressed, and not very confident. I was having a hard time making it through the day because I was just so tired of doing the same thing.

I made this blog so I could post about Troye without annoying my followers on my personal blog, and my URL was “welovetroyesivan18”. Right around when troyler posted their Valentine’s Day videos, my blog started picking up speed. I started talking to more people, making my own posts, and even getting noticed by Troye and Tyler.

Since then, I have made the most AMAZING friends ever. We video chat, we talk A LOT of shit, and we freak out over YouTubers. My life has changed so much since I met these people, and it’s crazy to think that my parents and most of my friends don’t even know this part of my life exists.

So these are the people I talk to the most and people that may not even like me but I get excited when they reblog from me so:

Alex whoistroyeanyway: Dude you’re so amazing. I know you don’t believe it but honestly, you’re like a perfect human. You’re smart, hilarious, and legit the sweetest person I know. Plus your videos rock and you’re Miranda impression is better than Colleen’s. Your smile makes me happy, and it makes everyone else overjoyed. You’re the absolute Queen of Tumblr, and your absolutely stunning. Thank you for always being there for me. 

Molly shiveringtroye: I love you to death Molly. If y'all didn’t know Molly and I found out that we have a real life connection and I’m kinda dead. You are legit the prettiest, kindest, and smartest person I know. I swear to god you are brighter than I am right now and you are two years(ish) younger than me??? Please be less perfect with your videos also your music taste is just perfect.

Alex1 (Alexander ((that’s not even his real name))) troyesweave: The one time we went on tinychat together was probably one of the funniest times ever. You don’t think your cool but I’m still slightly afraid to talk to you so…but seriously you’re not only hilarious but ridiculously talented and I want to real-life hang with you because we would just be partners in crime and we could collab and it would be perfect.

Kasey twinkbottomsivan: Kasey you are so frickin’ sweet I don’t even know how to explain. You’re not only so so sweet but you’re also my favorite gif maker on tumblr and if y'all didn’t know I stole (with permission) her gifs for my sidebar and it got 8x prettier. You are perfect. Please stop. 

Dai troyesnugget: We don’t talk enough tbh but I feel like I owe you this so…just wow I’m obsessed with you. Every time you reblog from me I freak out inside a little bc I can’t believe you actually follow me. You make me smile so hard inside and you are insanely pretty and I completely look up to you like you are the perfect fandom member. Also I’m listening to the music on your blog so that should be reason enough.

I don’t understand the big deal about the actual 2k number because I was just as happy with 1999, but this is just an excuse to be appreciative of y'all. To everyone who follows me, I LITERALLY could not have done it without you. Whenever I’m having a bad day, you cheer me up and make me smile. You reblog my videos after I beg you for 3 hours, and you like my stupid text posts. You’re amazing. Crazy how so much joy could be brought through a website :)


troyesivan: You make me smile to the end of the earth. A day goes by that I don’t see a picture of your beautiful face or hearing your magical voice is a day lost. I wouldn’t be where I am without me. Please know that you made all this happen and that I wouldn’t know all these cool people without you.

tyleroakley: You are such a special person, Tyler. You cause me, and so many other people joy, and you care so much about us. You will do the most amazing things with your life, thank you for inspiring me. Seeing you in Boston was one of the coolest experience of my life, please never stop being who you are.

Thank you if you read all of this. If you did you’re kinda crazy but it’s ok. I love you for that.