Be present. Make love. Make tea. Avoid small talk. Embrace conversation. Buy a plant, water it. Make your bed. Make someone else’s bed. Have a smart mouth, and quick wit. Run. Make art. Create. Swim in the ocean. Swim in the rain. Take chances. Ask questions. Make mistakes. Learn. Know your worth. Love fiercely. Forgive quickly. Let go of what doesn’t make you happy. Grow.
I want to write. I really do. I've been working on this story for years and creating the world inside my head, but whenever I actually open a notebook or sit at the computer I freeze. I'm scared of writing crap. I'm scared of it all being wasted hours, wasted years. How do I just force myself to write?
I’m actually happy you asked this on Anon, because I’m going to ask you a few very HARD questions.
You see, any other writing blog would probably point you at many of the dozen times they’ve answered questions like:
But that is not what your question is really about, isn’t it? No. There is a little something-something to your question that attracted my attention. And this is the part where the HARD (and rather mean) questions come in.
I don’t give a flying fuck who it was, but someone — at some point in your life — told you that writing was a waste of time. Your father, your mother, your school counselor, the pretty girl you met at that one party. I don’t care who it was, but their shitty personality planted the seed of doubt in the garden of your mind. And whoa are the weeds showing.
Do you really think writing is a waste of time? Or did someone tell you it was a waste of time?
Is there something else you would rather be doing? Or did someone tell you that you should be spending your time doing something else?
Those are not the hard questions. These are:
Do you enjoy writing? Do you enjoy telling stories?
If you do, then why do you think it would be a waste of time?
If you’re expecting to put words on the paper and make a masterpiece on the first draft then I am going to give you a reality check. That doesn’t happen. The first draft of everything is shit. It’s going to be crap, the real test comes in revising the story— cleaning it, polishing it, and then you will truly see the beauty in it.
Is it hard? Yeah. But so is everything in life.
I love telling stories. I know that no one else in the world can tell my stories, and that someone out there will be going through a hard time in their life— and that only my words will get them through it.
The garden of your mind is full of weeds, Anon. Doubt has very thick roots— but if you have the courage you can rip it out.
If your father told you that unless you’re a doctor you’re wasting your time. Fuck him and his opinion.
If your mom told you that unless you get married you’re wasting your time. Fuck her and her opinion.
If your school councelor told you that unless you go to an university and get a degree you’re wasting your time. Fuck them and their opinion.
If that pretty girl at that one party told you that nobody reads books anymore. Fuck her— and fuck her shitty ass opinion.
You’re going to die someday, Anon. Your minutes are counted. Spend them doing the things you love. The things you enjoy. It’s your life, and you don’t have to make anyone else happy but yourself.
Remove the doubt from the garden of your mind, and please let the flowers grow.
► Name ➔ Camilla ► Will you answer all questions truthfully ➔ yes ► Are you single ➔ yes ► Are you happy ➔ no ► Are you Italian ➔ yes ► Are you German ➔ no ► Are you Asian ➔ no ► Are you angry? ➔ no ► Are you Irish ➔ no ► Are your parents still married ➔ no
TEN FACTS ► Birth Place ➔ Italy ► Hair Color ➔ brown but i dyed them red ► Eye Color ➔ brown ► Birthday ➔ 30th June ► Mood ➔ sad and heartbroken ► Gender ➔ female ► Lefty or Righty ➔ righty ► Summer or winter ➔ it used to be winter but now i like summer better ► Morning or afternoon ➔ afternoon
TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE ► Are you in love ➔ no ► Do you believe in love at first sight ➔ no ► Who ended your last relationship ➔ no one ► Have you ever broken someone’s heart ➔ yes, i think so ► Are you afraid of commitments ➔ kind of ► Have you hugged someone within the last week? ➔ yes ► Have you ever had a secret admirer ➔ idk ► Have you ever broken your own heart? ➔ yes
► Love or lust ➔ Love ► Lemonade or iced tea ➔ iced tea ► Cats or Dogs ➔ koalas ► A few best friends or many regular friends ➔ a few best friends ► Television or internet ➔ internet ► Pepsi or Coke ➔ coke ► Wild night out or romantic night in ➔ romantic night in ► Day or night ➔ day ► IM or Phone ➔ phone
TEN HAVE YOU EVER ► Been caught sneaking out ➔ no ► Fallen down/up the stairs ➔ yes ► Finished an entire jawbreaker ➔ ► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? ➔ yes ► Prank called a store ➔ no ► Skipped school ➔ no ► Wanted to disappear ➔ yes
TEN PREFERENCES ► Smile or eyes ➔ smile ► Light or dark hair ➔ light on girls, both on guys ► Shorter or Taller ➔ taller ► Intelligence or Attraction ➔ intelligence ► Hook-up or Relationship ➔ relationship ► Funny and poor OR rich and serious ➔ funny and poor every reference to jack dawson is purely coincidental
ABOUT ME ► Last Phone Call ➔ my bff ► Last person you hung out with ➔ my bff, his boyfriend and a few of his friends ► Last thing you ate ➔ pasta ► Last thing you drank ➔ water ► Last site you went to ➔ efpfanfic.net ► Last place you were ➔ home
FAMILY ► Do you and your family get along ➔ mostly my mom, my brother and my dog ► Would you say you have a “messed up life” ➔ yes ► Have you ever run away from home ➔ no ► Have you ever gotten kicked out ➔ no
It’s not really a good day. Sure, he got laid
(if an exchange of quick handjobs in a bathroom counts) but it wasn’t at all what he wanted. It wasn’t- It wasn’t very good, it wasn’t in the slightest intimate. It wasn’t with Harry. He can feel himself over compensating, because when the fuck is he ever chippy in the mornings (or in general life)? And he might want Potter to give him some sort of reaction, but when Potter only looks sad, Draco is taken aback. That is not what he was aiming for. Does it mean… that Draco just totally screwed something up now?
He can barley make himself ask the question and when Malfoy slams him in the face with an “Of course!” there is just too much for him to handle. That he actually thought that Malfoy wouldn’t go through with it, because him and Harry had something going on, is starting to feel absurd. Clearly Harry was not thinking straight. Malfoy can do whatever he pleases and Harry will just have to live with that. He doesn’t get mental images of walking in on Draco and Blaise fucking. He needs to go vomit or cry (or both) in a corner.
Imagine one day being able to come home to the girl you love sitting on your couch. Resting your head on your shoulder as you unwind from the day behind you. Drinking tea with the love of your life and getting to know that she’s yours and you’re hers, forever.