your face should be hit with a shovel

A Girl Called Mike - Part Five

Pairing: Dean × Reader

Word Count: Around 2900

Summary: The reader disguises herself during hunting jobs as a man named Mike and has met up with the Winchesters several times. They are unaware of her true identity. Feeling they know and trust Mike, they agree to invite the reader to the bunker.

Click Here for Part 1

Part 2

Part Three

Part Four

Warnings: Language, Violence

This is purely for a hobby and my enjoyment. Maybe some of you will enjoy it too. I am by no means a writer so I apologize in advance for any mistakes or grammatical/spelling errors. I appreciate any feedback or suggestions!

@misguidedconqueress thank you so much for reviewing and sharing your wisdom! I love working (and chatting) with you!

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Dean sped down the freeway in the middle of the night, Sam had been able to trace your location to a small town outside of Lafayette, Louisiana. He didn’t understand Dean’s intentions or change of heart, but it didn’t matter. He didn’t want you deal with Crowley and hounds alone. So he didn’t ask Dean any questions and followed his lead. Dean insisted he drive, it would take over half a day to reach Lafayette with no stops, and that didn’t account for the time it would take to find you. As Crowley had not disclosed the timeline, in Dean’s mind, he needed to get to you as soon as possible.

Sam was catching up on some shut eye - leaving Dean alone with his thoughts. He knew he blew off Sam by spewing generic ramblings the night they found out, but to Dean, it felt like more than just being deceived. It felt like he had lost a brother, a best friend, replaced by someone he knew nothing about. Someone who he had put in danger on more than one occasion. Someone whose captivating smile and hypnotic eyes he couldn’t get out of his mind. He rolled his eyes at himself, putting those thoughts aside. No, they were going to save your ass this one time but that would be the end of it.

Of course that rat ran back to his master. It was your fault in the beginning for making a deal with a demon. You rubbed your arm where the deal was scrawled. To hold up his end of the bargain he did have to dig up information on Corson. But if you were being delivered the king of hell himself, one mere salesman’s deal wouldn’t matter.  Surely Crowley would have information. You’ve heard about him before; he was cunning, ruthless, and unforgiving. One good thing that came from that phone call was the head’s up.

You didn’t know what to think about the rest of the phone call. You were baffled as to how they found out in the first place. Sam you could understand. He wanted you out of harm’s way. But with Dean, all you could see was the look of animosity on his face when he found out who you truly were. He obviously wanted nothing to do with you; so why should he care about your wellbeing?

Replaying the call in your head, you laughed at yourself hearing the condescension in Dean’s tone. He didn’t think you had what it took to handle Crowley, which is why he ordered you out of there. Well, you would surely show him.

The third day came fast. Your shovel hit the gravel, remembering the patch from the same hole you dug a few weeks back. You removed the old box and replaced it with a fresh one, full of new belongings. Taking a deep breath, you covered it back up. Seconds later he arrived. You scratched at the wig as you contemplated his appearance. He wasn’t what you expected; resembling more of a slimy salesman than royalty, but by the way your skin crawled, it was undoubtedly him.

“Your Majesty, I presume.” You mocked by partially bowing, but did not lower your gaze from his.

“So, they gave you a heads up…” Crowley smiled. “You should have heeded their warning.”

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Sayings (Castiel x Reader)

#7: “Sweetheart. What did you bury in the garden?”


No matter how long you had been with Castiel, it still scared the living daylights out of you when he would just pop into your room without any warning.

This time was no different.

When your beloved angel appeared at the foot of your bed, dirt all over his trenchcoat and skin, and holding a shovel, you screamed.

“Cas! You scared the shit out of me!” you exclaimed as you sat up.

“It didn’t work, Y/N.” he huffed, his voice low and gravely.

“What didn’t work?” you asked.

“I went outside and buried it in the garden,like you said. But nothing happened.” his shoulders slumped.

That was when you started to worry, “What are you-”

“But Dean was still angry with me, so I thought that maybe I hadn’t dug deep enough.” he cut you off, throwing down the shovel.

“Sweetheart. What did you bury in the garden?” you asked, your hands slightly shaking as you placed it on his forearm.

“Your hatchet. You said that I should end my fight with Dean and bury the hatchet. I thought it was supposed to help.” he looked up at you, confusion written on his face.

“The hatch- Oh.” you were hit by realization, then you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing. It was just too good.

“I don’t understand why you are laughing.” he furrowed his eyebrows.

“It’s just a saying, Cas. ‘Bury the hatchet’ means to end the fight. Talk it out.” you finally managed to say when you had stopped laughing.

“Oh.” was his reply. He stood there, covered in dirt and looking a little sheepish.

Not caring, you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug. You smiled when you felt his arms settle on your waist.

“I’m going to need my hatchet back, though.”

If you have a pet that is an obligate carnivore, but you don’t feed it meat because you think it’s wrong…

I hope you know that I would like to hit you in the face with a shovel.